I would like to shed a little light on the reason for people being vague about their illness.
From the very beginning, when someone is first diagnosed, regardless of whether the patient quits smoking, quits drinking, or follows the strict diet guidelines, etc., the doctor puts the blame on their shoulders for what is happening to them at that point in their life. It's doesn't matter if a person has never smoked or drank, it's STILL their fault and nobody wants to be reminded who's fault it is, everytime they talk to anyone. So they keep it to themselves, and the less anyone knows, the less they will brow beat the person.
I am stage 4 heart failure, which I am convinced was caused by a virus, which was contracted at the ER in the local hospital, where I had taken my husband because he collasped(which was caused by medication the doctor had him taking). Anyway, pre-virus, I had had a stress test that came back 100% normal, with absolutely no blockages. Then I caught the virus and my heart enlarged, and got weak, and I went into heart failure.....none, of which, I consider to be my fault. However, when I was diagnosed with heart failure the doctor said it was MY fault, not the virus, that caused the problem. In any event, they did a heart cath on me, and found that I had no blockages still, but, it's still my fault.
Then, I had a heart attack in November. When I told my daughter, I made it abundantly clear that it was a small vein heart attack, and wasn't a dangerous situation. However, she attacked me, telling me it was MY fault, blah, blah, blah. So, now, I don't discuss my medical stuff with anyone, outside of this board, and my doctor....since he just won't shut up about it. :)
I need a heart, and kidney to survive, and I won't get either one because I need both, but I don't want to spend the rest of my life explaining my actions to everyone around me, so I just don't share. A person who is ill gets to the point that they feel like every single action they make is scrutinized by the people around them, and they, just want to be allowed to live what is left of their life.
As far as knowing how long you have with your Dad. Only God knows the answer to that question.
I hope the best for you......
Knowing how long you may have with your dad will be a very hard guess. I just lost my dad a week and a half ago. He awas in late stage copd and accidentally pulled his tube out of his oxygen machine while in the bathroom. Since he got so exhausted by barely moving he sat there for what seemed like hours I am sure to wait for someone to find him. My mother did but because of the lack of oxygen he suffered and was on a vent for 3 weeks then his heart just gave. This has been the most difficult thing for us because I was close, I was daddys little girl. My advise is to spend as much time with your father as possible. My father was the same stubborn and quiet about his disease for the most part. He also smoked. Take it one day at a time but don't leave him alone and don't take a day for granted. Jacki H NC
Hi Tiffany,
I used to work with seniors with COPD. What I know about it is that it can't be cured. You can keep it from getting worse, but you can't reverse it. Your dad sounds just like a typical COPD patient with the barrel chest and not being able to get very far without being out of breath.
There are exercises he can do to improve his breathing and his function. He needs to learn pursed-lip breathing for starters. He can also do seated exercises with light hand weights to improve his functioning as well.
Is he monitoring his heart failure symptoms like swelling and weight gain? He should be weighing himself to check for sudden fluid weight gain. His doctor probably mentioned needing to keep his salt and fluid intake controlled as well. Avoiding frozen meals and convenience foods will help greatly. Those can have more than a day's worth of salt in one serving.
Heart failure patients have to control salt because eating too much makes the body hold too much fluid which overloads the heart that is already weakened.
Sorry he's having trouble with quitting smoking. Unfortunately, nicotine is on the top of the list of the most addictive substances there are. Many heart patients and COPD patients continue to smoke, even until death. Maybe you could help him with his diet and exercise to control his symptoms and improve his quality of life and functioning.
Good luck with your dad