Sexually assaulted, found out I was pregnant

[Expecting_myfirst]

Please help me. I was sexually assaulted and found out I was pregnant on New Years Eve, I have a boyfriend & we both do not believe in abortions. However I can not have a baby by my attacker. However, I have been through so much trauma that I don't want to go through with an abortion if in fact it is my boyfriends baby. I didn't tell my mother I got attacked, she only knows that u am pregnant and is kicking me out. I have no means of financial stability od another place fo stay. I am so scared. Please help. My boyfriend wants to keep the baby too, but he doesn't know what happened to me. I am embarrassed of it. Please please please help me. I can't even express how sincerely thankful I will FOREVER be. I don't want to go through with another devastating event if I don't have to. I feel gross in my own body, it's not fair my boyfriend is so happy... Thank you in advance!!!  


If anyone has information on prenatal DNA testing etc, any advice or support is Appreciated!!



Here's some information : my last period was November 2014 I was sexually asaulted December 5th but was sexually romantic with my boyfriend everyday/every other day from my last period... My attacker used a condom for the most of it I believe... Please help me. Thank you! I

P.s. Does anyone know of a way to get some sort of finachail help to pay for the testing which I know is super expensive. I haven't opened up about this to anyone, I know it wasn't my fault but I shouldn't have been in that situation. I'm scared and feel so guilty.

[AnnieBrooke]

Make sure to ask the doctor to review the actual films from the first ultrasound.  Later ultrasounds are just not helpful, because babies grow at different rates.  But embryos do all begin as just one cell.  The earlier the ultrasound the better, for answering these questions.

[Expecting_myfirst]

Thanks girl.

[AnnieBrooke]

No, it doesn't really, since if the guy on the 5th did manage to get any sperm into your system, it stays a while.  

Talk it over with your doctor.  I'm sorry you're in this pickle.

[Expecting_myfirst]

I will DEFF have to do that. Also, I forgot to fall you, the new due date is September 2,2015 thy said their BEST guess as the when conception was, was December 10,2014 ... Does that make any difference in determining
If it's my boyfriend or ..:

[AnnieBrooke]

Well, I think in your shoes I would discuss this with the doctor.  None of the dates (whether you are due August 24 or whether you were 7 weeks, 0 days on January 13) entirely rule out the date of December 5 for producing the baby, but possibly if you explain the situation (take a copy of the rape report so he will see you are not just making up a story because you had two boyfriends) and ask him to review the films from the first ultrasound, he might at least be able to clarify for you whether the 7 weeks figure was accurate at that first ultrasound.  

[Expecting_myfirst]

My first ultrasound was on January 13,2015

[Expecting_myfirst]

Ok. My first ultrasound they said I was 7 weeks, but kept my due date being August 24th. I believe it was based solely on my last period being November 18th,2014. I heard the heartbeat for the first time today, I've seen it before but hearing it is making things feel so much better !! :)

[AnnieBrooke]

And at what week of pregnancy were you when you had your FIRST ultrasound?  Later ones don't matter as much for dating a pregnancy, it is the earliest one that matters (and that's the one I'm asking about.)

[Expecting_myfirst]

I had an appointment today and she pushed my due date to deffinetekg August 31st

[AnnieBrooke]

And at what week of pregnancy did the doctor say you were when you had the first ultrasound, the one that gave you the due date of August 24?

[Expecting_myfirst]

Yes everyday including the day of the assault, but not since.

[AnnieBrooke]

Hi, at what week of pregnancy did the doctor say you were when you had the first ultrasound, the one that gave you the due date of August 24?  You say you had been having sex every day unprotected with your boyfriend around the time of the assault, was it literally every day?  Including the day of the assault?

[Expecting_myfirst]

Who thinks it's my boyfriends baby?



Who thinks it's my attackers ?

[Expecting_myfirst]

But what do you most likely think the baby's father will be? Based on dates etc? Or is there absolutely no way to determine? Should I get the Prenatal dna test? Ahhh in so scared & stressed. It blows my mind how sick people can be. God might forgive, I won't.

[mandajayne0333]

While sometimes it can take a while to conceive you can get pregnant just having sex once. All u need is one sperm to get to the egg and youre pregnant. My sister got pregnant the first time she lost her virginity. She only had sex once. I hope for your sake ots your boyfriend and everything works out, i couldnt imagine what you are going through to be honest but that said you can get pregnant just having sex once and i dont know why everyone keeps saying it takes a week or a couple of days. I only had sex once the month i concieved and here i am 34 weeks pregnant.

[omayraf]

It wasn't your friends fault what happened to you, but i do understand the way you feel towards her. Talk to your mom i'm sure she will be there for you every step of the way & if your bf loves you he will be there for you too. Answer to your question the baby can be either your bf or your attackers but it is still your baby & it needs its mommy<3 God bless you i'm sure everything will fall into place.

[Expecting_myfirst]

Thank you ladies !!!!! But if it takes a week to conceive does that mean it deff can't be my attackers? Also could the genetic testing help determine since my boyfriend and I are 100% Italian and my attacker was Spanish of something  of that ethnicity.. My friend dated a Spanish dude and that's what most of the guys were there she knew I wasn't comfortable and she left me there I will never forgive her

[Liyahsmommy1]

There are also programs out there to help you. Try going through the state to help you with food, or cash assistance. Also housing programs. There are many programs out there that is willing to help pregnant mothers. Just got to go out and get it. Because it won't just come to you.! Good luck.

[Liyahsmommy1]

It takes roughly a week to conceive. I am sorry you had to go through that. But it would be in your best interest to go and tell your mom and boyfriend so they can be there every step of the way with you. So yu don't have to go through the pain alone. I've never experienced this myself however, talking about it to someone who loves you and won't judge you will be the best decision you have ever made and you will realize that after you do so. I wish the best of luck to you. And always remember that precious baby inside you is also part of you. Even though it could have happened because of the situation however, he/she needs the love and affection from you and everyone else who is around you. Also remember, God will not put you through something he knows you couldn't handle. He made us women strong and we can deal with a whole lot. I honestly wish you the best of luck with everything and I hope even though your not exactly sure who the father is that baby is unconditionally loved by you and your boyfriend.! Just take it day by day and don't stress yourself out because it is hard on the baby. Keep your head up. You got this.! :)

[Expecting_myfirst]

Thank you ladies !!!

[jenz21]

:) thank u ladies

[Kristinstith]

I was sexually assaulted at 13 and didn't tell my family until I was 16. You need to tell your family and boyfriend, not only will you feel relieved but you can get justice. I know I just wanted to forget about it but I look back now and wish I had pressed charges do the scum bag couldn't do it to anyone else. I hope this post isn't fake and I'm really sorry about all the women on here saying horrible things, rape isn't a joke. I understand how dirty you feel and how embarrassing it is but it's not your fault!

[AllysaRose]

Best advice right now would be to tell your boyfriend of the incident because what is he going to think when the baby comes & worst comes to worst maybe it isn't his ? Then he will definitely leave because he would wonder why you his such a thing from him . talk to him , you need him right now more than ever especially after what happened . talk to your doctor and find out some options you have if it isn't his & you don't want to keep your attackers baby , there are plenty of people who would love to have a child but can't & would gladly take yours .

[Expecting_myfirst]

I just want to make sure it's my boyfriends he is so happy & I can't handle an abortion after all that happened but I also know I can't have a baby with the awful sad excuse for a "man" who could've done this. The only thing that would be good was the police would have the attackers DNA by the baby!!