its back..and with a vengeance :(

[andrewm88]

hi everyone, i know its been a while since i have posted, been really caught up with school and finals *sigh*, i recently just moved in with a couple of friends because i was living alone and it was driving me crazy. i feel like this should have helped the problem somehow but i cant help but feel extremely depressed for the past 2 days, to the point where death is the only option out, i dont make plans to kill myself but the thought just lingers. im really at the end of my rope, i feel like a stranger in my own body, im not the person i used to be...happy, energetic and full of life. i also have this overwhelming sense that i am somehow deserving of this, i dont understand i consider myself to be a good person but i guess bad things happen to good people. sorry to be such a downer but i have nowhere else to turn but to blog my feelings out, i am fedup of calling my parents becuase when im sad it just burdens them and my friends are fedup of hearing about it. everything just seems alien to me and life just seems flat, grey and with no prospects for the future. iv been trying alot of herbal stuff but none of it has helped. i think im going to just say to hell with it and start my presciption of Pristiq 50mg because i dont know where else to turn.

[Dwet]

Just remember no matter how bad you feel, killing yourself is never an option.  You would hurt and burden so many ppl by doing that.  You will feel better eventually, just take one day at a time, one hour, one min if you have to.  But eventually you will be better.  I have had depression and anxiety for a long time on and off and i hit rock bottom when i realized that i wanted to die to end all my pain and suffering.  Then I was reading an article online about a kid who committed suicide and all the pain, hurt and suffering on his loved ones faces made me think that suicide would be plane selfish.  If worst comes to worst, pick up the phone, and call 911 and tell them you are contaplating suicide.  They will most likely keep you at the hospital and get you the help you need.  Just be strong and make it through these darkest nights because there is always a brighter day.   Good luck !!

[DreamNaut]

I was were you were a few months ago. I started an SNRI and my depression improved within ONE day, on the lowest dose. Thats how terribly depressed I was. You have to understand if your depression does not improve you have to get on the meds. In the meantime, running will buy you some relief. Each time I ran a mile I would get a few hours of mild relief aftwards. Believe it or not all those thoughts your having is due to depression, and most likely 99% of them are completely irrational. I fought with my thoughts and anhedonia for nearly 5 months. Once the slow motor movements started kicking in , i threw in the towel, and im glad I did. I feel 100% better and its only been 2 weeks.

God bless.