getting bad

[septmomma827]

Ok, so here is my history. I was first diagnosed with anxiety and depression 10 years ago at age 16. I've been on antidepressants since then. I had a bad breakdown 2.5 years ago, causing me to be off work for 6 weeks, (severe agoraphobia) and lost 38 lbs in the 6 weeks. Since that resolved with a huge bump in medication and counseling, I've been pretty good. I tapered off my medication 6 months ago because I was trying to get pregnant. I got pregnant in January, and miscarried in march. the last month has been hard and only being harder. My boyfriend and I have been fighting like crazy, and I truly believe it is bc of my anxiety/depression. I'm getting back on meds and have been takings my prn Klonopin, but I just feel like everything is taking apart and I can't do anything about it but worry. Its taking a huge toll on my relationship and is starting to effect my job.

[Rain4Lafleur]

I wanted to tell you that journaling is a great idea.  Also, there are new meds out there that do not take as much time to kick in.  Viibryd worked quickly for me and has made a huge difference.
I am thankful this site is available for me and other people to write to each other.  Again, best to you.

[Rain4Lafleur]

I am sorry for the loss of your baby.  Even a person without emotional difficulties (I am not sure this person exists) would have great trouble with the loss of a pregnancy.  Hormones really get out of whack.  As another forum commentor said, she had suffered miscarriages.  I have, also. Grief is not over in just a few days after your experience.  
You mention arguing with your bf.  As you know, irritability is part of depression.  It is easy for others to misunderstand this. And, too, he has experienced a loss, also.
I wish you well. Stay in therapy and don't change meds without discussing with your physician or health provider.  You have been through a lot.

[septmomma827]

I'm going to the doctor now. I just wish there was something our there that was a magic fix our drug that doesn't take 4 to 6 weeks to feel effects. I started a journal on here, maybe that will help...

[forgottensick]

  Hi there. I too have had anxiety/depression my whole life. I have been on many different meds trying to find the right one that worked for me. They are all different. MAYBE you need to change meds. I suggest you be totally open with the doctor about how you feel and what has been happening. Every med I was on helped in some way but didn`t do it all until I was put on Paxil. That is what turned MY life around. But it doesn`t work for everybody. You need to find the one that works for you. It sounds like you have a lot of stress in your life too. All the medication in the world won`t help you don`t have a good home life with support. Sadly enough, they don`t make a pill for that.....yet.  Hang in there and when you need to vent, come here. We`ll listen.
Dan

[trying43]

So do you think the miscarriage caused things to get stirred up again?  That in itself can cause anyone issues and having suffered 2 myself I know how that feels.  It may be too that the hormones from the pregnancy/miscarriage threw you for a loop too. Are you and ur bf in any kind of couples counciling?  It may benefit you both.  Are you seeing anyone for therapy at all?  Sometimes another unbiased ear can help and maybe they can offer you some coping techniques to get you through.  Have you tried journaling your thoughts when you feel anxious or depressed?  Sometimes just getting it out in paper helps. I am sorry you are dealing with this and I hope you get the help you need soon and feel better.  And please I hope you wont do anything to yourself.  That wont solve anything at all.  Best of luck to you.

[septmomma827]

Darn phone. for the first time in my life, this past weekend I actually starting thinking about suicide, taking pills. I don't think I could ever actually do it, but it scares me. I'm not sure if there is a question in all of this,I just ranges to talk to someone.