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Diabetes - Type 1 Community
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Avatar universal

Type I Diabetes and Marriage

Is it advisable for people with juvenile-onset diabetes to get married? My parents are forcing me to break up with a diabetic because he is not "marriage material".. apparently diabetics who have had diabetes for a long time (this boy has had it since 17) begin complications really early.. my dad is an eye doctor and he says that he gets patients with diabetic complications in their eyes every single day, and that they get blind by their 40s if they even last that long.. not to mention all these other long-term complications... gangrenes, amputations, strokes, etc etc... are my parents being overprotective or do they have a point?
19 Responses
Avatar universal
Hello, Mary.  Of course people with diabetes can get married.  Having diabetes is not a reason to avoid marriage.  People with diabetes these days are doing much better with diabetes management, and the rate of complications in people who are using these management principles are dropping drammatically.  20 years ago, this wasn't the case, so the patients that your dad sees fall into that group, where they didn't have the tools and the knowledge that we have today.  I'd have your significant other show that he can and does manage his diabetes well.  Your parents need to understand that times have changed with respect to diabetes care, and there is no reason to break up with someone simply because of diabetes.
Avatar universal
Mary,

I have been a diabetic since I was 14.  I am now 49.

I am very active and have no diabetic problems, but I do take care of myself.

I was diagnosed with diabetic retnepothy when I was 28 and according to my eye Dr. at last months visit it has not progressed since I was first in his office 21 years ago.  In fact he told me he would be dead before I needed lasar on my eyes.

Your parents are wrong.  Diabetics can have a very long and fulfilling life, but as with anyone healthy or not things can happen to us in our life that will shorten it, that is the chance you will have to take with anyone, diabetic or not.

Diabeties can be taken care of with the proper meds, diet and exorcise.

Bob
Avatar universal
Just a thought--do your parents like this boy?  Maybe there are other reasons for their dislike of this boy, because I guess I find it hard to believe someone would make you break up simply because they have diabetes.  In fact someone as knowledgeable as your father would know that diabetes management has progressed as above mentioned.  
And are these patients your father sees Type 2 diabetics? Type 1 diabetes is when the pancreas does not produce insulin. Type 2 diabetes is most often diagnosed in people who are overweight, do not exercise and have a history of neglecting the needs of their bodies.  Therefore Type 2 diabetics still produce insulin but their bodies do not use the insulin sufficiently or I could say properly.    
Anyway, why don't you try talking to your parents, maybe there was some miscommunication.  
Avatar universal
I have been married to a Type 1 diabetic for almost 2 years now.  He is 41 and was diagnosed at the age of 9.  I will not tell you that it is not hard at times but you can not let this disease stop you from marrying someone you love.  My husband takes care of himself, works, hunts and fishes.  The only major complication he has had so far is diabetic retinopothy.  He is currently having his second set of laser treatments for this problem and his retina specialist says he should be fine as long as he has regular checkups. Good luck with your situation.  I hope everything works out for the best.
Avatar universal
I am a type 1 diabetic and just got married! And it's great (which has nothing to do with diabetes).

I think that you parents are having some other issue, either with him or with the idea of you growing up. Plus, if you love him, then you love all of him. He may even be a lot healthier because a lot of people with diabetes take better care of themselves than other people!

Don't base your relationship decisions on diabetes! We are normal people :)
307500 tn?1302119746
I have had Diabetes since I was 16 and I went on to get married and have 4 beautiful children. I am 51 and I have taking very good care of myself. Ur parent are being silly. Don't break off a mariiage if u Love him truely. Diabetes is not a contagious disease. And he won't be the one having the babies, u will, so all will be fine. I feel sorry for your boyfriend, your parents are starting out holding a gridge all to soon for not a good reason...My, my...
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