How to best support my husband

[songinmind]

My Husband just told me two days ago that he has diabetes.  He's 48 and just slightly overweight- this was quite a surprise to us.

He had a fasting glucose of ~300 and A1C of 7.8.  He was put on metformin 500 1x/day.  

I guess I'm having a tough time really understanding what he's going through right now.  We were just married in January and he's 18 years older than I am.  We have had a few discussions about what this means for our lifestyle and how he feels about this.  The only feeling I get from him is that he feels he's letting me down by not being as healthy as he thought he was.  

Does anyone have any tips or advice on how to best support him in these early weeks/months?

[bellafotos]

Hi, a lot of the times, even some of the healthiest of people can get diabetes.  I was one of those individuals. I was healthy, very athletic, muscular, super active-on-the-go all the time.... Then one day, I woke up just not feeling well. I was exhausted all the time. Couldn't get out of bed. I would go to work and come home and sleep all night til the next day. I started gaining all kinds of weight and no matter how much I worked out, I started gaining like crazy. After seeing 6 doctors, it finally took a thyroid specialist tol find out & tell me I had a metabolic disorder that was throwing my thyroid into hypothyroidism, which threw my liver enzymes up and into non alcoholics fatty liver disease ... Which then resulted into chronic kidney stones and type 2 diabetes. The best way to support your spouse is not to play the blame game or make him feel guilty at all. Support him by cooking him healthy meals and eating them with him. Remove the temptations and avoid things that can spike his sugar levels. Not all of us eat ourselves into a diabetic frenzy. If he hates to exercise, even the smallest amount like a 30 min walk a day makes a big difference. I hate being a diabetic. It's so much worse for women then it is men...  It already sounds like you are on a great path to help him just by being concerned.  Sometimes weightloss reverses type 2... And if it gets out of hand, gastric bypass reverses it too! Good luck!

[brice1967]

I'm sorry about the diagnosis.  I know how frightening it can be.  You're plugging along, enjoying life and then this hits you square between the eyes!  Our minds always rush to the "worst" of things, but I just want to say that if you look at this like a wake up call compared to a death sentence, you can be just fine.  For some folks, managing their diabetes is rather simple.  For others, it takes a lot of work.  I feel that the best way to support your husband is, go through the necessary life changes with him. Change your diet, watch the carbohydrates, get exercise, test his/your levels often, let him know that you are there every step of the way.  to me, there is no better support system than having someone walk in the same shoes at the same time.  Spend more times taking walks and being outdoors.  Join a gym or do yoga together.  Bottom line, let him know that you are willing to do whatever is necessary in order to help him out.  The lifestyle changes are only as difficult as you want them to be.  Again, if you look at them as a penalty, you're likely to not stick with a program.  Look at it as your time to get things right and it often seems to come together a lot easier.  Keep in touch and let us know how its going.

[Super_sally888]

Hello,

This is a very stressful time for you and your husband.

Could you ask the Drs whether there is possibility if he has type 1, instead of type 2.  It is possible to have type 1 diabetes at any age.  They can find this out by testing for antibodies and also by testing c-peptide which tells how much insulin his body is still producing.  Given that his blood sugar is this high, even with treatment (normal is < 7.7), it could be a possibility.

Is he on insulin yet?

I would like to reassure you that diabetes is a manageable disease with the right tools; including medications, diet, and exercise.

Suggest you start reading up.  Some good books are Diabetes Solutions (by Dr. Richard Bernstein).  If he will be on insulin then Using Insulin (by John Walsh), and Think Like a Pancreas, are also very helpful books.

Please come back and let us know how things are going?

[Nortje]

My husband has been diagnosed last week with type 2 and he is in hospital, but the doctors are struggling to get the HbA1C down it fluctuate alot. the first 4 days is was between 24-26 now 19-21 after a week in hospital. He lost 13kg and is not over weight at all. He is starting to worry and getting a bit depressed. I cried my eyes out on my way from the hospital to see him like that. We live about 1hr away from the nearest doctor.

[Super_sally888]

Diabetes is a very manageable condition.  It is managed by diet, exercise and medication, as necessary.  you can get as educated as possible and eat well and exercise together.

Support him by helping him get the tools to manage this well. And living the lifestyle with him.

Best wishes.  You will both be fine!

[hava]

You can make your husband healthy and have a happy married life with pranayam.Both of you do it together.
These pranayam exercises will help control the diabetes and the side effects.Build up the timing gradually.If you feel tired or dizzy, stop and resume later(after about a minute).The benefits will be noticed in weeks as the sugar level and weight can be checked.Over the long term the diabetes will be in full control and the medication can be reviewed.

Kapalbhati -(Do it before eating) Push air forcefully out through the nose about once per second. Stomach will itself go in(contract in). The breathing in(through the nose) will happen automatically. Establish a rhythm and do for 15 to 30 minutes twice a day.
Children under 15 years – do 10 to 15 minutes twice a day.
Not for pregnant women. Seriously ill people do it gently.

Anulom Vilom –
Close your right nostril with thumb and deep breath-in through left nostril
then – close left nostril with two fingers and breath-out through right nostril
then -keeping the left nostril closed deep breath-in through right nostril
then - close your right nostril with thumb and breath-out through left nostril.
This is one cycle of anulom vilom.
Repeat this cycle for 15 to 30 minutes twice a day.
Children under 15 years -  do 10 to 15 minutes twice a day.
You can do this before breakfast/lunch/dinner or before bedtime or in bed.Remember to take deep long breaths into the lungs.You can do this while sitting on floor or chair or lying in bed.

Also everyday, press the centre point of the palm of both your  hands 40 times with the thumb and press the tips of all fingers 40 times each.
To stimulate the pancreas to produce insulin: mandukasan - kneel down(with feet pointing inwards,and sit on the ankles/heels, Vajrasan position), breathe in and breathe out completely and hold your breath, pull the stomach in, press both your  hands on stomach, bend forward as much as possible keeping the head straight, hold for 5 to 15 seconds and come back up while breathing in. Repeat  this 3 times daily  to stimulate the kidney and pancreas.Mandukasan2 - Repeat the whole process,but this time with with fists of both hands pressing against the stomach.Mandukasan can be done sitting on a chair, if you cannot bend the legs.
Continue the breathing exercises once a day, after the diabetes is in full control.