what to do.

[helppmee1234]

its been 7 months since my dog died. I think about him everyday and every second. As the months went pass, I couldn't live, I lost my appetite, my interest in everything, and most of all I can't stand dogs anymore. I use to love dogs, but now when ever I see a dog, my heart hurts and I think about my dog and I can't stand being near a dog. I can't stop thinking about him, and I know i shouldn't because he probably hates me. After all, it was my fault he got sick and I was the one who took him to the doctors to put him to sleep. He was so scared and he didn't want to go. He didn't want to. My dog has always been the kindest. When I yelled at him he would always come back. He would wag his tail and look at me with his big brown eyes and rest his chin on my lap and just stand there staring at me. Is it bad to think about him? after all i had done to him? is it wrong?

[workshop]

I have just lost my dog through misdiagnoses from a vet , my new vet said there was probably a tumour on the lung come in tomorrow for an x-ray. That  night she died fluid built on her lung her upper respiratory tract gave way and died through drowning from her own fluid and not being able to breath it was awful had we of known we could have allowed to go peacefully. Im gutted my old vet never picked up on it only because we could have prevented her horrid death. She was nearly 15 and i rescued her at 1.
Thanks all who read this , by writing this it helps me get through.

[tonyb286]

You have been given some excellent advice and suggestions by prior posters and I just want to add my own concern about you. Please make sure you let your mom know how you feel and please call the number given by littlebit667 above. Keep in contact with us ... we really want to know that you are ok. Depression is a terrible thing (I know from my own experience) and it can cause us to lose the sense of rational thoughts. Please take good care of yourself. Tony

[littlebit667]

I read your other posts and I want to say my husband is bipolar and I understand your concerns.  Please talk to your doctor about this episode.  You may need more help than we can give you at this time.  

[ginger899]

Please listen.....I am not pitying you, but I certainly know the depth of that pain and grief when a loved one has died, and the guilt that goes with it, feeling that we let them down....feeling that we ever did things to hurt them...feeling that we didn't give them NEARLY enough love and care in their lives...
A lot of my loved ones have died, and I am very much alone nowadays, so I do know. And there isn't ONE of them that I feel I did things perfectly with while they were alive. If I look at it deeply -every single one I let down in one way or another, and yes there are regrets in my heart.
All I do is try to do my best next time. That's all we can do, any of us. I wonder if that's what were here for -to keep learning how to do better, to purify our Hearts more and more.

Anyway, please listen. Your beloved dog was suffering the late stages of cancer. His body was filling up with fluids, (ascites) nothing inside him was working properly any more. Yes, the fluid could have been drained off, but because of the cancer, it would have all come back again. Hewas beginning to shut down.
Cancer is weird, there are good days and bad days. Sometimes, even in the late stages of cancer, the patient can seem to rally, and we believe they can even get better! We think some more medicine, or some more treatment or whatever -will help them. But it never works for long. All we can buy them is days at a time by that stage.
So what happened there was that you took your dog to the vet....you didn't want to, he didn't want to go (they never do) and you made that heart-rending agonising decision, to have his suffering ended.
That was the bravest thing, probably, that you have ever had to do. It will torture you. You WILL blame yourself. We all do.
But never forget, you are brave, and you had the strength and selflessness to do that.
Now please get some help for the deep and painful depression. I know. I've been there. Someone, something -is there for you. Go and find it. If you had the strength to come to the help of your dog under such dreadful circumstances -then you have the strength to do this.
Bless you. Please take care of your own precious Soul.

[littlebit667]

This is not pity...You need help and NOW!  You did NOT kill your dog you helped end his pain.  He did not understand why he was hurting and you did the only thing you could do to help him.  I want you to call this number and talk to them until you calm down.

The number is:  1-800-784-2433 .  Then tomorrow talk to your mother and ask her to find you help.  You have been kicked into full depression and need help immediately.  These people are trying to help and you are not ready to hear it yet.  I understand that.  Please call the number and be truthful.  You will get help until tomorrow when you will talk to your mother.  She needs to know the pain you are in and she will want to know.
she is your mother and nothing matters more than that.  Please, Please do these things.

[helppmee1234]

STOP LYING TO ME! ALL OF YOU. STOP LYING.... I KNOW I KILLED HIM...why him? why did I kill him.... I HATE MYSELF I HATE MYSELF> i should be dead not him WHY!