Bisacodyl, Bulimic and desperate

[Felicityinabox]

Ive been taking bisacodyl laxatives(5mg tablet) for about 6 years now, Im a 19 year old female, weigh about 140 at 5'8. Ive struggled with bulimia since i was 13 and am now taking 27 pills a night leaving me at 135mg. I dont sleep well anymore and usually am still exhausted and dont want to get up even after 12 hours of sleep. Ive been told im in pain all night because of the noises i make from the constant cramping but dont remember since i sleep through it. I wake up about 5-8 times that i can recall to use the restroom, lately this has involved vomiting instead of the usual diarrhea. When i wake up im to hot and feel like i cant breath, my heart races to where i feel like ill fall over and the pain is horrid. By the time im done with each bowel movement im freezing and clamy. When i get up in the morning  i usually have to have coffee or some sort of caffeine before i can actually function. My heart literally hurts, I get pounding in my chest and its painful to breathe. What is going to happen to me? Is it possible to die of an overdose or just from the dehydration? Im struggling and cannot stop, I hate the way food feels in my body and only find comfort when my stomach is raw. On some occasions i find my disorder getting so bad i weigh and keep an reference of everything that goes in and out. Ive been very successful in hiding my disease from most except my husband and i want to rid myself of it before my children become old enough to notice.

[Felicityinabox]

Thank you all do much

[CalGal]

Felicity, the fact that you're reaching out to talk to the members of this group is a good thing and it can be a first step in getting some help for what's currently going on.

Eating disorders can be very difficult on a body and they can unfortunately result in a number of different physical problems in the long run. It sounds like you need both some emotional and physical help in coping. Have you considered talking to a therapist and also talking to your doctor? I'd really like to urge you to reach out to some professionals and get some help sooner rather than later.

[patient915]

Hopefully this post will be moved to the eating disorders community where you can get a more appropriate answer.  I am sorry that there are people that are responding to your post who have no knowledge of eating disorders, and are providing no helpful information or support at all.  Mental illness is a very hard thing to deal with, and even though you know you are causing yourself harm, you don't know how to stop it.  Please try and get yourself some help for your eating disorder, if not for you, then for your husband and kids.  Good luck with everything.