Aa
A
A
Close
19200244 tn?1473835044

adoption or surrogacy?

Adoption or surrogacy?
Can’t make myself choose between these two options. I will have to undergo either surrogacy on donor’s eggs or just will start the adopting process. Maybe someone of you have a piece of advice for me because I honestly don’t know. It’s the same for each option in terms of money and time, and I have always had this thought in my head that there are too many kids without families and I have always wanted to help them. But having your own kid is so incredible and amazing, such a thing that everyone would want to experience. I must say that as for the adoption I would like to adopt a newborn if it is possible. I know nothing about it whatsoever and would like someone to enlighten me on it. I know that it is a very hard process and I would like to know if it is worth my time and my money.
I have to admit that my husband does want to have his own child, even though I won’t participate in our future baby’s making at all, he will give his sperm. So the kid will be his. But not mine, some woman will carry him. I am not sure that I will be able to love him at all. Knowing about how he came to this world.
Please, will you be so kind to tell me what to do? Thanks.
Read more
Cancel
Follow
Upvote - 0
5 Answers
Page 1 of 1
Avatar universal
We adopted, best decision ever. She is the light of my life. And I know she's so happy she was picked by our family. I'm so glad we did this.
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Comment
Post Comment
134578 tn?1517087675
You can't be the surrogate?  (Even if you have to use donor eggs it doesn't rule out being the person who carries the child.)

I'd go for donor eggs and surrogacy.  The baby would biologically be from your husband, and the timelines are faster, and there are very few infants available to adopt which means you wait and wait.
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Comment
Post Comment
Avatar universal
Surrogacy id love to help wemen who are infertile have a baby or 2 :)
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Comment
Post Comment
Avatar universal
I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I know how you feel. You're not alone with this! I don't have a uterus but I have a desire to become a mother. Well there are some options for me. I chose surrogacy. Now I'm looking for information and where it can be done. This process is not easy at all. Sometimes I feel like I'm stuck and no one can help. I can't talk about it with friends or family. All people I know have children and don't have problems with fertility. They just don't get it. They will never understand how I feel. It feels like every month someone announces their pregnancy. Every month someone makes a baby shower. Not to mention all those photos of kids in social network. This is so hard and sometimes I feel like I can't take it anymore. I don't want to be rude but sometimes I have to skip baby showers or babies’ birthdays. I have to make up reasons not to go and it makes me feel a bad person. But what can I do? I'm sure when I will have my baby it will be easy for me. I will be able to divide happiness of parenthood with my friends. But now it makes me feel even more stressed than I am.
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Comment
Post Comment
961574 tn?1505958942
if you are able to carry a pregnancy, you could look into donor\adopted embryos.  
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Comment
Post Comment
Your Answer
Avatar universal
Answer
Do you know how to answer? Tap here to leave your answer...
Answer
Answer
Post Answer
A
A
Fertility / Infertility / IVF Community Resources
Top Trying to Conceive Answerers
5875562 tn?1410902486
Blank
miami, FL
973741 tn?1342346373
Blank
4769306 tn?1519524956
Blank
NC