Just needed to vent...

[Cheli06]

Once again the Oct treatment for IUI did not take...I got AF right on time this morning...right before I had to go to work...I hate when that happens b/c I go to work with this big knot in my throat and I cannot cry at all...In this last treatment they told us by the director of the department that I have done it 5 times already and my chances at 36 years old is 8%...8%! noone had told us that...We are paying 50% of the treatment...it just takes a toll in all directions to be in this situation...He said the next logical step is IVF...0% coverage by insurance...we need to come up with $15000 for one try with this clinic...where would we get that from?  Sometimes it feels irrational that I want a baby so much but I cannot afford to have such treatment...does that mean that I cannot afford a child at all?  should I have the $15K available now so i can feel less of a failure as a woman?  I am really frustrated, confused, hurt, disappointed, lost, sad, angry, hopeless...anything and everything but normal.

Losing hope...

[AmburG]

It's definitely worth looking into Cheli, Just like with india it's around $2000 USD here and that's including all meds, injections, and every dr visit! Plus surgery and the procedure and the freezing of the embryos!! Wishing you luck in finding something!!

Amber

[Cheli06]

My DH had mentioned to go back to our country to do it and come back so I am not looking into contact clinics in El Salvador to see how to start that whole process going over there.
Thank you so much for your suggestions and good luck.

Take care.

Cheli

[babyhope40527]

Agree with you totally. I know travelling may not be possible all the time for everyone. In India, 1 cycle of IVF costs max of $2000, including meds and everything. even donor egg is cheap there, if my December attempt does not work, i am going India to get it done, I am an indian so its easy for me to do it.

[AmburG]

So sorry sweetie! I can't believe the dr did not tell you this! We just had our first unsuccessful try at it and I'm 27 and he said the first time we had a 25% chance and this time if we wanted to do it again we'd have a 15% chance! If you can't afford IVF I'd really recommend travelling to do it. We came to Egypt for IVF and the cost is insanely different then that of the US! My dh is egyptian so we had a reason to come other then that, but if you can find a place to go cheaper it'd be worth it!

[Cheli06]

Thank you for taking the time to read my post...I am the problem in the equation...DH has a prior child and his results are great everytime...we are looking into refinancing our house to see if we can at least have enough for 1 try...I am thinking maybe by the beginning of next year we can start again.  I am glad I have this place to come and vent feelings only ladies that are going through are expericing as well.

Take care and SSBD...

[babyhope40527]

Cheli, feel sad to read your post. Wish it worked this time. It hurts. You cant express the exact pain that you have. you may run out of words. and on top of that being at work, i had the days where i went to ladies room and cried silently. 15k is huge. wish your insurance pays it. is there a way you can change the job where insurance covers it? by now you might know if it is male factor or female factor issues. could that be sperm that is not taking it? or could that be egg you know? can you afford a personal loan for the treatment, which you could pay off later on. i am sure you must have looked at all the options. when IUI does not work, sadly IVF is the only way. you may end up having a beautiful baby in the first go, never know. vent it out, let the pain slowly move out of you, you feel better slowly, good luck, you take care. there is still hope. remember that.

i pray for you.

love and hugs
babyhope