Please I Need your advise

[MDF333]

My wife is 19wk pregnant after IVF procedure ( 8 years fertility), our precious baby diagnosed yesterday with major congenital hear problem, our baby will need at least 3 surgeries with the first 2 years to correct the bllod circulation and after that he/she will not be normal...... we considering termination ( IT IS VERY HARD DECISION ) ....Actually I have many questions in case we do termination:

1. Any risk on my wife ( will probably 20wk).
2. Is this termination may affect on her uterus
3. How long my wife needs to go back to normal ( uterus size and breast size )
4. When we can start do IVF again
5. What is your advice
my wife had PCO with moderate to severe hyperstimulation in addition she is taking her Thyroid pills.

Thanks
God bless you

[trying43]

Sorry I hit post again accidently.  To me it would never be a question because I couldn't end my baby's life.  I am sorry u both r going through this and u are both in my prayers.

[trying43]

Since you asked if I was in your shoes I would not terminate.  Medicine an ultrasound are not perfect.  My best friends daughter was told her baby was going to be born with a cleft pallet and club foot and other deformities and she should terminate.  Against drs advice she didn't and the baby was born fine a healthy little girl.  Another couple my dh works with similar thing happened.  They were told their baby was going to b born with a cleft pallet so severe it wouldn't ever b able to b surgically fixed and baby would have to b tube fed for the rest of his life. They did not terminate.  The baby was born with only a slight deformity that was corrected in 2  surgeries.  

[rmmoye]

If i were in your shoes i would ignore the politics and what everyone else says and thinks.  I can give you one story that may help. We have a guy named dave in savannah. they told him and his wife that there child would be born brain dead. It was a hard decision but they kept it because they said when they went to heaven they wanted to stand before GOd  and say that they left the decision with him. The baby was born happy and healthy. it laughed, coed,smiled, played. It lived 6 months and then died in its sleep.

My aunt also was told that they baby would die and she might die if she kept it. She decide to keep the baby. both were fine. her youngest is actually married and has children of her own now.  

I told u these stories to show u that God is in control and to tell u that if it were me i would leave it in Gods hands. U may have this baby and it die the day after it is born but at least u go tto see and hold it.  You and your wife are already attached to it and love it. do what is best for your emotions. No matter what u decide U are already a dad!  

The dr. could be wring!!! they are not always correct!!!

I will keep u in my prayers.  

[MDF333]

We can not imagine that our baby will go through many surgeries ** open chest ** ( Dr will decide how many depends on her condition and her health but at least 2-3) , cann't imagine feeding tube for 6 months, our life will be stopped and our baby life will struggling too , she will not be happy.... is it fair to let baby comes in our world and struggling because I want to be a dad !!!!! I know Our LORD GOD is the great physician but he decide to creat this heart with defect !!!

What you will do in case of you are in my shoes ? (finger cross)
Guys, would you please answer this question ASAP, only 2 options Stop or continue
Waiting your replies ASAP

God bless all of you

[trying43]

God can do wonderous things but remember its not in our time but his.  We don't know what his plans are.  We don't know who's life your little one will touch by being born.  Trust in him.   He knows our name before we are in our mothers womb. I am praying for a great miracle for your family.  Remember our Lord God is the great physician.  Good luck to you.

[rmmoye]

I am so sorry! Just remember God is still there for u and that sometimes his answer is no. I know this is hard. >:D< Hug for u and your wife. Just pray for God to help you make the right decision.

[MDF333]

We did repeat ECHO again today ......NO MIRACLE .... Same situation , nothing changed  :(((

[worththewait78]

One of my dear friends had a baby born with severe heart complications and she had over 10 surgeries in her first year of life.  She actually ended up having a heart transplant when she was just a year and a half old.  BUT despite all of that, she is now a happy and healthy 3 year old girl!!  I don't think that it is a reason to terminate the pregnancy at all.  But then again, I am not in your shoes and can't imagine the agonization you must be going through.  

[rmmoye]

I am still praying for the 3 of u. God gives us miracles everyday. Hoping to hear great news on thursday. No matter what happens Know that GOD is there for u.

[MyYuyin2005]

My heart goes out to you and your wife.  I cannot imagine the pain you are going through.  I will keep you, your wife, and the baby in my prayers.  I will pray for a miracle.  Stay strong for your wife she is going to need your support.

[Risa615]

I will say a prayer for your family for sure!!  Please keep us posted.  Aug. 4 is a very important day.  

Risa

[MDF333]

Thank you guys for your support, My wife and I are dying ......... :(
I talked with pediatric cardiovascular surgeon, he said the baby has to do at least 3 surgery, after delivery they will transfer our baby to another hospital for investigation for 1 - 2 wk , first operation will be within 2 month, 2nd operation will be 4 month later, the 3rd one will be in 2 -3 years depends on the baby condition .. during this time the baby will be bluish , pale , difficulty in breathing and cann't feed well and might be affect his growth.. if he continue grow he might be have arrithymia and heart failure ( no body know ) baby will have restricted activity during his life and there is chance to reach adulthood .... he will take medication all his life ( blood thinner, Blood pressure medication ....etc ).

I begged the doctor to repeat the ECHO again and he said it is useless , nothing will change, i told him i am waiting a MIRACLE from OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST ...... we will repeat the ECHO coming Thursday August 4th, 2011......... JESUS CHRIST please touch and heal my baby 's heart ...:((

PLEASE PRAY FOR MY WIFE AND I

THANKS

[rmmoye]

I know this is a hard decision. I would not want to be in your shoes. I will pray for u. and your wife.  My nephew was born with a hole in his heart. they said he would need surgery. The doctors put him on meds and it closed up by its self.  He is a very active boy. He does have altisum but still functions very well. I get him everysummer for a few weeks. You would never know he had heart problems.  The emotions part is what i would worry about. It is going to be hard on both u and her no matter what u decide. U will be in my prayers.

[Kricket212]

I am also praying for your family.  These are surely questions you should be asking your Dr.
May God bless your sweet babies.

[AnnieBrooke]

Talk to the doctor about your questions, since they are so serious.  He or she should be able to help advise you.  

[MDF333]

Thank you Risa... really, we need you prayers badly :((((

[Risa615]

I don't have advice, but I wanted to let you know my friends child had heart issues, was in the hospital the first 4 months of his life and also had surgeries, and it was hard as she stopped working and lived nearby.  He recovered from all surgeries and is now a happy and healthy 3 year old.  He was smaller than most for a while, but now he is catching up on weight.  

I know you are facing some tought choices, so I will say a prayer for you and your wife.
Risa