Rest In Peace Beloved Mother - Death Anniversary 7/19/09

[Judy246]

In Loving Memory of my beloved mother Cathy, who's 2 yr. death anniversary is this Sunday, July 19th

God saw you getting weaker and did what He thought was best. He heard me calling on Him, as I held you gasping for breath. God had mercy on us, looked down and called your name, He said, Cathy, I know you are tired, come home, come to rest.

My heart will eternally be broken. My life will never be the same. God took you in his arms and ended your pain but changed my life forever. I thought of you with love today, but that is nothing new, I thought about you yesterday and days before that too. I think of you in silence, I often speak your name, now all I have is your memories and your picture in a frame. Your memory is my keepsake with which I will never part, God has you in his keeping and I have you in my heart.

Rest in peace my beloved mother until we meet again.

Your loving daugher Judy

[specialmom]

I too lost my mom in the ICU.  It was sudden,however,  She had had surgery that was outpatient and minor that went terribly wrong.  She ended up with a perforated bowel and sepsis.  She was rushed to the hospital by ambulence and they tried to do surgery to repair the damage done.  They couldn't.  It was the longest 27 hours of my life from that surgery until her heart beat for the last time.  I stayed with her as well until the end.  Her heart would beat stronger when I talked to her so I kept talking and praying out loud.  The doctors went from telling me she had a 80% chance of survival right after surgery to no hope and it was time to let her go.  It was all so sudden and she was a healthy 50 year old woman.  I was in shock for two years at least.  I kept thinking I was seeing her places or seeing her car.  Until just a few years ago, I was haunted in my dreams.  Every dream that I had about her, she was either about to die or had been alive all this time and hiding from me.  They were nightmares.  After I had my kids, the dreams have dramatically changed and are happier.  They are less often however and less vivid.  The picture of her in ICU has finally faded as it was not a pretty picture.  Neta and Judy, this memory will fade for you too----  and you will remember what your mother and father/friend really looked like.  I'm glad that you both were with them in the end as I really believe that even if unconscious, this gave them comfort.  See, you even gave to them when your heart was breaking.   What good daughters you were!!

I agree about wanting the world to know that this special person existed.  It is hard as no one speaks of my mom anymore.  The most meaningful person throughout the majority of my life----  and no one currently in my life knows her.  

Judy, you've had a child since losing your mom too.  It is hard to tell them about their grandmother as it is painful.  My kids see that it hurts me and they, bless their hearts, try to comfort me.  

Sweet dreams to us all----  and peace in our hearts.  

[Judy246]

Thank you Neta and I understand about the ICU. When my mother was rushed to the ICU, died 9 hours later as I held her. She had an enlarged heart (Congestive Heart Failure), and the diabeties fill her lungs with fluid and as much as they removed the fluid, more would come back. She died sufficated followed by a heart attack. I held her. She was swollen and due to the lack of oxygen, she started changing colors. Her ears and lips were purplish/blue.  She also had so many tubes, she was almost unrecognizable, but she didn't die alone. She was surrounded by every member of the family including her youngest grandchild. It's bittersweet that she died July 19th and became a brand new grandmother July 21st two years later. Thank you for your kindness...and I will keep everyone grieving in my thoughts and prayers.  Judy

[Judy246]

I also invite everyone to visit my mom's grave too...click on my "Judy246" and I have pictures...thank  you all.

[Judy246]

You truly are a special person and I am so very sorry for your loss also. I too have a box with my mother's cloth's that I selected to keep. I too at times will take a special robe or dress and just hug and smell it to feel my mother again.

Death speared my heart forever when it took my mother away. Many times I wish I just cuddle with her in her resting place. A family friends mother meant well and said to me, "Judy, your not alone, I will adopt you and be your mom" and she hugged me and I said, "but I have a mother"....I want to tell the world that I have a mother, she's just dead, but I have a mother!!!

I always tell people who have their mother to love them, to be kind and do everything for them, because one day they will look back as I do and have no regrets. I did everything humanly possible for my mother and she died in my arms, but no regrets....I would have traded my life for hers.

I hope she will visit me in the form of a dream, so that I can see her again if only for just a moment.  Thank you again...Judy

[Neta100]

Hi there.  I lost a dear man who was like a dad to me two years ago, on September 12th.  I still miss him and a day doesn't go by in which I don't think of him.  He had been sick for several years and when I saw him lying in the ICU connected to a machine to breath, I knew it was time to let him go.  He wouldn't want to see himself like that and he had been through so much already.  So, I said good bye to him and now, two years after his death, I still wish he were here, but I know he is up there resting and in peace, and I know that one day I will meet him again and we'll be able to have a blast as in the past.

His wife is still going through a rough patch and I think that as time goes by you learn how to go on without your beloved one, but you'll always miss him or her.  The only way to keep him or her alive is to take him / her with you in your heart and cherish his / her memories, and thinking that someday you'll meet again.

I send you a big hug and a prayer.  And continue keeping your mom with you and talking to her.  She might not be down here, but she'll be listening and will help you out.

Neta

[specialmom]

Hi Judy246,
I understand completely what you are saying---- trying to feel close to her again.  I don't think anyone knows about this, but I have some of her clothes in a box and when I open it----  I smell her perfume.  It takes me right back in time.  For a brief and fleeting second, I'm back in the moment.

I had  physical recently and I was talking to the doctor who is this really nice and kind woman.  I've see her for a few years and she always asks me about how I'm doing with the loss of my mom.  She left the room for a minute and I glanced at my chart, she actually wrote "she still suffers from a broken heart about her mother."  I thought---- wow!  that is so true.  She's never said it that way to me or even acted like this was the case but it was interesting to see it in my medical chart.

Do you ever feel jealous of your friends that still have their mom's?  I must admit I do even though I know I shouldn't.  

Well, thanks for listening.  Someone who understands is so nice.  I wish you peaceful dreams with maybe a nighttime visit from your mom!