Driving myself crazy

[gs1754]

I am a 23 yr old straight male. Although I usually wear a condom when engaging in sex, I have made some mistakes in my past. My girlfriend of 4 years, who we normally engaged in unprotected sex (no longer) has been tested for HIV - which she is negative (not sure if that helps much) - she is the only one who I've had intercourse more than a few times with unprotected.  I have been under much anxiety lately, and I've come to the conclusion that I most likely have HIV for various reasons:

1. Since I was 16, I've had unprotected sex with 6 different women (5 of them were a 1 time thing).
2. About a year ago I had multiple painful ulcers in my mouth, which the doctor diagnosed me with coxsackie virus.
3. About a year ago I can remember having some kind of 'thrush' on the side my tongue, the same time I had coxsackie (it got worse with the use of anti-biododics).

I've read on here multiple posts, and I find that I am spending more time on the internet researching / reading articles on HIV - and I've fully convinced myself that I have this illness. I know the simple solution would be to get tested, but I am afraid I can not live with a positive result, as I am sure will be the outcome.

Please help

[gs1754]

For all those who read this:

I've been searching the internet for months now about HIV, and my risky behavior I have had in the past. I decided today that I would put an end to it. I got tested, and my results came in HIV non-reactive (negative). Do yourself a favor, and go get tested.

I feel like the weight has been lifted, and I can finally get some sleep. I was in your shoes

[gs1754]

I'm going to get tested today. Thanks.

[jhguy011]

There really is nothing else you can do other than to get tested.  You probably don't have it, but it's really easy to convince yourself of anything if you're anxious enough.