Aa
HJ from stripper - have symptoms
Hi, thank you for taking my question. 4.5 weeks ago I received a hand job from a stripper with a condom. Before she put on the condom she rubbed the head of my penis for a second or two. During the HJ, I played with her clit with my thumb, which was intact (no open cuts or sores), for about a minute. She was wet so there was fluid contact with my thumb. Afterward, I went to the washroom and washed my hands. I pulled off the rubber and then with the same hand urinated (thereby touching the base of my penis). Washed hands again. After I left the club, I used hand sanitizer.
Symptoms:
-9 days later, came down with a cold and sore throat.
-11days later, went for HIV antibody test to establish a baseline result for no prior exposures (last sexual encounter was 7 months prior - and very low risk. The test result was fine.
- intermittent headaches for the next few days (days 9-14)
- malaise and fatigue set in at about day 12 and still continues but not nearly as acute as at first.
- feverish at times from days 9-20 and a little but now from time to time.
- muscle aches in back occasionally occur now (i normally don't feel this way)
- sore throat persists occasionally (the lump in the throat as if going to get sick - not to be confused with swollen glands.
Typical symptoms that i did not have:
- diaharea
- thrush
- rash
- swollen lymph nodes
- joint pain
Question:
With the risk of me touching her being low-to-none with an intact thumb, what might be my level of risk from her momentarily touching the head of my penis and then masturbating me with a condom?
If she had infectious fluid on her hand, I assume the HJ that followed could have pushed it down the urethra? This seems very remote - but a possible risk?
This is all speculation because everything else seemed safe. I cannot account for my symptoms. Could my fear/anxiety/depression from this encounter cause these symptoms?
Please help. Thank you.
Symptoms:
-9 days later, came down with a cold and sore throat.
-11days later, went for HIV antibody test to establish a baseline result for no prior exposures (last sexual encounter was 7 months prior - and very low risk. The test result was fine.
- intermittent headaches for the next few days (days 9-14)
- malaise and fatigue set in at about day 12 and still continues but not nearly as acute as at first.
- feverish at times from days 9-20 and a little but now from time to time.
- muscle aches in back occasionally occur now (i normally don't feel this way)
- sore throat persists occasionally (the lump in the throat as if going to get sick - not to be confused with swollen glands.
Typical symptoms that i did not have:
- diaharea
- thrush
- rash
- swollen lymph nodes
- joint pain
Question:
With the risk of me touching her being low-to-none with an intact thumb, what might be my level of risk from her momentarily touching the head of my penis and then masturbating me with a condom?
If she had infectious fluid on her hand, I assume the HJ that followed could have pushed it down the urethra? This seems very remote - but a possible risk?
This is all speculation because everything else seemed safe. I cannot account for my symptoms. Could my fear/anxiety/depression from this encounter cause these symptoms?
Please help. Thank you.
Ok, thanks for the insight and help. I very much hope that you are correct and I will know in a day or two (hopefully). Thank you for your dedication to this forum and helping others.
You were not exposed to HIV from her even if she was positive.
Agreed. I'm concerned about my exposure to a virus from her.
Your main issue is most likely guilt over your hand job incident. I can't tell you how many times I've seen married men fall apart after they're has some kind of sexual encounter at a strip club. You need to talk to a therapist about this so you can put this into better perspective. Your issue is not HIV, it is PSYCHOLOGICAL, and you need to seek appropriate help before you destroy your marriage.
You cannot give anyone anything that you don't have and you do not have HIV from kissing a stripper.
And probably part of my concern is that my wife seems to be demonstrating some of these same symptoms. However, we have not yet broached the subject (I've been waiting for test results to drive that conversation if it needs to occur). However, seeing fatigue, abdominal pain in her gives reason to think that it is not anxiety induced but actually a real condition (HIV or other).
Did you confront your wife with the concerns that you believe she infected you with HIV?
I don't mean any disrespect, Teak, but what is not rational about asking for some insight into the actual risk of a one-time unprotected encounter? Yes the other questions might be predicated on emotion but there are some valid questions here and some very real concerns.
I think your best bet is to consult a mental health professional to help you figure you why you are so fixated on HIV.
Irrational thinking.
Thank you again for this forum. I have some follow-up questions that I would like some help with.
I had not previously disclosed that two weeks after my seemingly low/no risk encounter at the strip club (previously described), I had unprotected vaginal sex with my wife. Now I'm wondering about my risk from her. I went to get tested and will get tested again at 3 months but in the interim, I'm becoming increasingly concerned with my symptoms - some of which have abated and some of which are new.
After my last post, (4.5 weeks after the strip club and 2.5 weeks after unprotected vaginal sex with wife), I started to develop muscle aches in back (between shoulder blades) and a bloating feeling in abdomen. This abdominal pain came after the headaches, which have subsided. The abdominal discomfort developed into increasingly sharp pains over a couple days in lower left and lower right abdomen so I checked into the ER. A CT scan showed appendix was fine and a CBC panel + differential showed the WBC was normal (ER doc said they were not elevated or low but I don't know the exact values). The abdominal pain and bloating is felt daily but not as severely as when I checked into the ER. Sometimes it feels like a side ache from exercising after eating. Other times it feels as if I were punched in the stomach.
Question 1:) My "symptoms" (headache, malaise, fatigue, weakness, abdominal pain) have not been concentrated into the typical 1-2 week window but have been staggered over 5+ weeks. Do we have any indication of what percentage of people who have ARS do not exhibit symptoms in a 1-2 week window?
Question 2:) What are the odds that abdominal pain would be an indication of ARS? I've read both that abdominal pain can accompany diarrhea (which I did not have) as a symptom but I have also ready that abdominal pain by itself isn't really a symptom (and even diarrhea and nausea are not primary symptoms of fever, rash, and headaches).
Question 3:) Last week I went for a physical and more tests. Blood work (metabolic panel) was fine and came back in a couple days. However, my HIV test has not returned now in 6 calendar days!!! I'm worried that it came out positive and is being re-tested for confirmation. My previous HIV test at the same lab only took 2 days!!! Does this test-result window seem abnormally long if the result were to be negative?
Question 4): I've read that the risk of male-->female infection is somewhat low (1:1000 or greater). I've read that female -->male infection from the same is even less likely to transmit the virus. There are many factors that can play into this (viral load, circumcision, cuts, etc.) but I don't understand how if the virus is not transmitted easily in this manner, why so many people seem to get infected from a single exposure? Or do they?
Question 5): Since this forum considers my strip-club encounter to be low/no risk, what kind of risk might I be with this one unprotected vaginal-sex encounter with ejaculation inside my wife? (Fwiw, I'm circumcised, no STDs ever, and my wife has not any STDs but I have suspected infidelity/multiple male partners with her.)
Any insight to these questions would help my anxiety. I realize that the tests will tell conclusively. However, this is an emotionally charged issue for me and I'm very concerned about my prognosis. I feel like I'm "all in" on this gamble; much is at stake here and it's hard to continue acting normally (as a dad, husband, employee) with this level of stress.
Thanks, in advance.
I had not previously disclosed that two weeks after my seemingly low/no risk encounter at the strip club (previously described), I had unprotected vaginal sex with my wife. Now I'm wondering about my risk from her. I went to get tested and will get tested again at 3 months but in the interim, I'm becoming increasingly concerned with my symptoms - some of which have abated and some of which are new.
After my last post, (4.5 weeks after the strip club and 2.5 weeks after unprotected vaginal sex with wife), I started to develop muscle aches in back (between shoulder blades) and a bloating feeling in abdomen. This abdominal pain came after the headaches, which have subsided. The abdominal discomfort developed into increasingly sharp pains over a couple days in lower left and lower right abdomen so I checked into the ER. A CT scan showed appendix was fine and a CBC panel + differential showed the WBC was normal (ER doc said they were not elevated or low but I don't know the exact values). The abdominal pain and bloating is felt daily but not as severely as when I checked into the ER. Sometimes it feels like a side ache from exercising after eating. Other times it feels as if I were punched in the stomach.
Question 1:) My "symptoms" (headache, malaise, fatigue, weakness, abdominal pain) have not been concentrated into the typical 1-2 week window but have been staggered over 5+ weeks. Do we have any indication of what percentage of people who have ARS do not exhibit symptoms in a 1-2 week window?
Question 2:) What are the odds that abdominal pain would be an indication of ARS? I've read both that abdominal pain can accompany diarrhea (which I did not have) as a symptom but I have also ready that abdominal pain by itself isn't really a symptom (and even diarrhea and nausea are not primary symptoms of fever, rash, and headaches).
Question 3:) Last week I went for a physical and more tests. Blood work (metabolic panel) was fine and came back in a couple days. However, my HIV test has not returned now in 6 calendar days!!! I'm worried that it came out positive and is being re-tested for confirmation. My previous HIV test at the same lab only took 2 days!!! Does this test-result window seem abnormally long if the result were to be negative?
Question 4): I've read that the risk of male-->female infection is somewhat low (1:1000 or greater). I've read that female -->male infection from the same is even less likely to transmit the virus. There are many factors that can play into this (viral load, circumcision, cuts, etc.) but I don't understand how if the virus is not transmitted easily in this manner, why so many people seem to get infected from a single exposure? Or do they?
Question 5): Since this forum considers my strip-club encounter to be low/no risk, what kind of risk might I be with this one unprotected vaginal-sex encounter with ejaculation inside my wife? (Fwiw, I'm circumcised, no STDs ever, and my wife has not any STDs but I have suspected infidelity/multiple male partners with her.)
Any insight to these questions would help my anxiety. I realize that the tests will tell conclusively. However, this is an emotionally charged issue for me and I'm very concerned about my prognosis. I feel like I'm "all in" on this gamble; much is at stake here and it's hard to continue acting normally (as a dad, husband, employee) with this level of stress.
Thanks, in advance.
Thank you very much for the clarification. This helps to put my mind at ease - although it'll take a while I'm sure.
That is what genital-hand-genital contact means: transfer of fluids from a partners genitals to hands and then your genitals. Her hand could have been soaked in fluid and it would not be a risk. HIV does not maintain its infectiousness outside the human body.
Thanks Joggen. I agree with those scenarios. I guess my question comes down to a hypothetical; what if there was a minute amount of vaginal fluid on her hand when she rubbed my head? What if there was cum or pre-cum on her hand from a previous guy? Im not saying there was - but is a possibility and what would the risk be? Low or none? Some people say HIV dies on contact with air. Others say it lives for minutes at normal concentrations (and for hours in a lab environment at unreaistically high concentrations).
Hand-genital, genital-hand, genital-hand-genital, etc. contact is not a risk for HIV infection. Using a condom for a handjob is a waste of latex, and having anxiety and depression over it is a waste of emotional energy. This was a NON-EVENT. Forget about it like you would any other masturbatory activity and move on with your life.
I should be clear; my questions pertain to my risk of contracting HIV. Very concerned about this. Thank you.
You are reading content posted in the HIV Prevention Community
Condoms are the most effective way to prevent HIV and STDs.
PrEP is used by people with high risk to prevent HIV infection.
Can I get HIV from surfaces, like toilet seats?
Can you get HIV from casual contact, like hugging?
Frequency of HIV testing depends on your risk.
Post-exposure prophylaxis (PEP) may help prevent HIV infection.
