Avatar universal

Vaginal fluid HIV exposure

Hi, my question relates to hiv and possible exposure. I was at a strip club and a stripper wiped vaginal fluid in my mouth and caught me off guard. I merely wiped it my mouth with my sleeve and didn’t think anything of it until 5 weeks later developed neuropathy symptoms and at 7 weeks my arm lymph nodes felt tender and still do to this day 6 months later.
My wife has also had several recurrent mouth ulcer and recently has lymph node swelling in her neck.  I’ve started checking symptoms and everything points to HIV.
Most forums say oral sex is low risk but there is nothing detailing something physically by hand putting vaginal fluid in one’s mouth and the risk associated with that.
What is the risk here and if very little what could these symptoms be.
I’m freaking out as we have two kids and I was minding my own business on a bachelor party and this happens.. I’m so devastated!
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Avatar universal
That is not how HIV is spread. In an adult, the only risks are unprotected anal/vaginal sex and sharing IV drug needles with infected users. Nothing you described is any risk for HIV.
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20801659 tn?1520443393
HIV looses its capacity to infect once exposed to air. That's the reason why in 40 years of history, there has never been a single case of infection from a external surface.
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Does that mean it would have lost its capacity to infect with a second or two between her wiping herself then putting it in my mouth?
I’m only concerned due to neuropathy symptoms I developed 5 weeks post exposure wich remain today (albeit mild) 6 months ago now. My wife also has recurrent ulcers now so I’m worried I’ve potentially infected her.  Also I’m tender where arm lymph nodes are. This is the reason for my concern.
Are these symptoms HIV?
Once again, this is NOT a mode of transmission for HIV. In an adult, only unprotected anal and vaginal sex or sharing IV drug needles with infected users are a risk. Nothing else that you can think of will result in HIV infection. Symptoms are not used to diagnose HIV and are therefore totally irrelevant to your story.
I’ve reread my post after reading the replies and just wanted to clarify that the stripper wiped the fluid directly from her hands in to my mouth but was more on my gums as she tried to get her fingers into my mouth. My reaction was to naturally close my mouth which meant she wiped them on my gum.
The reason I bring this up as it appears to be quite unique to say someone giving oral where the fluids would naturally be on the tongue where there is more saliva unlike the gums where there are entry points to the blood stream should there be any cavities or ulcers.
I’m really concerned simply due to the symptoms of both me and my wife. My wife has had bad multiple recurrent ulcers and lymph node swelling and me neuropathy and lymph node swelling.

I appreciate you say this is zero risk but it’s slightly different to straight oral. In addition some say this is zero risk and some day low risk - please could you clarify.

Could the symptoms also be perhaps Syphilis and not HIV?

Thank you
Your questions are just variations of your previous ones, and they ignore the advice that Chima correctly gave to you, so reread about "NOT". Even if you had a risk, you are wasting your time trying to diagnose disease from symptoms since you have to pretend that no other condition can cause those symptoms - pretending and guessing are wasting your time and will just cause endless anxiety if you don't stop.

The below is the same thing Chima said but in more detail.
This answers all of your HIV questions, and if you can think of any more just reread about the 3. You had zero risk therefore  testing is irrelevant to your situation because you had zero risk. HIV is a fragile virus, which is instantly inactivated in air and also in saliva which means it is effectively dead so it can't infect from touching, external rubbing or oral activities. It doesn't matter if you and they were actively bleeding or had cuts at the time either because the HIV is effectively dead.  
Only 3 adult risks are the following:
1. unprotected penetrating vaginal with a penis
2. unprotected penetrating anal sex with a penis
3. sharing needles that you inject with.
The only way to get HIV is if you did one of the 3. The situation you describe is a long way from any of these 3.
Even with blood, lactation, cuts, rashes, burns, etc the air or the saliva does not allow inactivated virus to infect from touching, external rubbing or oral activities. Doctors have calculated the risk from what you describe to be less than that of being hit by a meteor, therefore no one will get HIV from what you did in the next 40 years of your life either. The above HIV science is 40 years old and very well established, so no detail that you can add to your encounter will change it from zero risk.
If you didn't have one of the 3 then you are just worrying about your own hiv theory - which is unrealistic for you to think that can become reality - so you should move on back to your happy life instead.
Thank you, appreciate the detailed feedback and apologies for going over and over this but it’s quite stressful for me having a wife and kids and it’s an exposure I didn’t go looking for... yes I put myself in that situation but was a bachelor party and was minding my own business making it harder to comprehend.
Thank you again
You say it is quite stressful which suggests you are still worrying. If so, which of the only 3 do you feel was your risk?
I see your point. The answer is none.  Thanks
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