Vance/NurseGirl

[Fall123]

Hi,

I am a female and I am very worried about some sexual acts.  I made out with a guy on at least 10-15 different occasions and may have had cuts/sores in my mouth, along with my wisdom tooth looking like its causing a cut through my back molar.  What if he had cuts/blood in his mouth when we were kissing?  Also, he inserted his fingers inside me and may have had cuts, etc.  Does this pose a risk even if he was bleeding from cuts?  Lastly, which concerns me the most is that he performed unprotected cunnilingus on me for not very long.  I don't even think he stuck his tongue up my vagina.  I think he just licked the outer portion, but I am not positive.  I am worried about this because Dr. HHH says its not a risk, but then says we can't say it won't happen but it is too rare too worry about indicating a risk.  Can you please clarify receiving cunnilingus?  I don't know this guys hiv status; although, he claims to be negative.  Would your answers still be the same even if the guy was known to be hiv positive?  I am freaking out because my tongue has been  a little white and the left side of my neck has felt stiff, which could indicate swollen glands.  Please answer!!! Thanks!

[nursegirl6572]

Are my symptoms a concern?  No.  You're likely over-analyzing things secondary to anxiety.  People often complain of problems with their tongues (white color, etc), but if you ask them, admittedly, they never really paid attention to it before.  Most likely your tongue has always looked like that, or does from time to time.  Not to mention, that isn't an HIV symptom anyway.  A stiff neck also is not an ARS symptom.

Are there any scientific studies on these issues? There has been a lot of data collection and research done about HIV in general, yes.  Because HIV is an illness that doctors are required to report upon diagnosis, that allows for a lot of data collection, which in turn results in pictures being painted of how people are becoming infected.

There are tons of studies about risk factors, and every one comes to the same conclusion pretty much, regardless even of geographical location.  The people getting HIV typically engage in repeated high risk activities, and often demonstrate multiple high risk behaviors.  

The majority of new infections occur in men having unprotected sex with other men, then IV drug abusers, then heterosexual unprotected INSERTIVE sex.  If foreplay activities led to infection, they would be at least listed as an uncommon occurence.  It's not ever listed at all if you carefully read the studies. If it's ever mentioned, it's a brief blurb that one person claims this or that, but that the info was not reliable, verifiable or significant. Here's one example:

http://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/mm6147a5.htm

Another:

http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/topics/women/resources/factsheets/pdf/women.pdf

And another:

http://www.dabtheaidsbearproject.com/woandhivrifa.html

If you read through the studies, nowhere do they even MENTION a low risk for non insertive sexual acts.  Even if an agency wants to assign certain acts as a "theoretical" risk, that's still not something to be concerned about.  It's just semantics and a CYA thing.  NO one ever wants to put themselves in a position to be told by someone, "HA!  You were WRONG!  I got infected by x, y z".  Especially when you're talking about a disease that relies almost solely on subjective data collection (ie what the person reports).  People can claim anything.  An agency like the CDC isn't going to purposely open themselves up for liability.  Docs too.  That's why often times, you won't see those folks commit to saying things like "never", "always", "Impossible", etc.

So, in summary, you have ZERO to worry about.  

[Fall123]

Ok, thanks Nurse girl.  I read a response from Teak about what theoretical risk meant and it kind of scared me.  He said theoretical means no documented cases.  Although there is a possibility, it isn't likely.  SO I keep thinking I will be like the 1 in a million.  Are my symptoms a concern?  A white coated tongue and stiff neck.  Although the stiff neck subsided after a few days....I think I slept on it wrong.  I do drink a lot of alcohol and have post nasal drip I think so possibly that's the cause of my white tongue or maybe I never noticed it before and its normal, I don't know.  I won't write anymore.  Just wanted these last few details clarified.  Are there any scientific studies on these issues?

[nursegirl6572]

NOT a concern!!

[Fall123]

Thanks so much Vance.  I am definitely going to try to move past this.  The symptoms just scare me, although I know they could be due to anything.  One last question if you don't mind answering.....Are theoretical risks anything to be concerned about?  I see a lot of questions on here that say in theory, cuts could raise the risk, but it doesn't happen.  Just wanted to make sure theoretical risks aren't a concern.  Thanks to you and Teak!

[Vance2335]

Move past that Dr's rarely will give an absolute. Move past and use the words Teak wrote.

[Fall123]

Ok thanks so much Vance.  I will try to put this behind me.  I was worried about the white tongue and sore neck.  So, basically I should move past that no absolutes can be given?  Only that I need to move on and not worry?

[Vance2335]

Reread what teak wrote.

[Fall123]

Ok Vance,

So do I need to get tested for these exposures?  I'm so worried if there is a possibility.  Plus I have a regular partner that I am going back to and don't want to infect him.  Do you think it would be safe to have unprotected sex with him?  Am I at risk based on the possible cuts, etc. in mouth when kissing or cuts when fingering, or cunnilingus performed on me.

[Vance2335]

Most Dr's will not give absolutes.

[Fall123]

Thanks Teak!  Do you know why Dr. HHH says those things?  Like it is not to say it can't happen, but it is too rare to worry about?  It makes anxious people like me worry because he saying a risk may be indicated.

[Teak]

Not an HIV concern, even if the other person was HIV positive.