What does "protected" mean?
Thanks in advance for all of your help everybody. My final question is, if this person I had intercourse with had HSV am I still in the clear from HIV due to my condom use? I ask only because a few days later I did get a mildly congested throat that didn't clear up for a few days and, now that it has cleared up, I am pretty sure that my neck lymph nodes are at least a little swollen, particularly on the right side (and tomorrow will mark a week since the initial congetsion). I haven't had any fever or any other HSV symptoms, but it makes me worry about the likelihood of having gotten something from her. Again, I wouldn't even be thinking HIV if it weren't for what little knowledge of her sexual history that I do have.
And thank you FMMax. I agree that this has taught me that I really can't stomach this type of sexual encounter. I am really hoping that this first and only incident isn't something I pay for and regret for the rest of my life.
I think choosing a partner wisely is the right thing to do, HOWEVER, it is the ACT and how one protects themselves that defines what is a a risk and what isn't. A person can have anal or vaginal sex with a corfirmed + partner, as long as they use condoms consistently and correctly, there will never be a risk (with the exception of a condom failure).
The OP had no risk, he is suffering from anxiety, like so many others do. The condom protected him. Now he needs to put this behind him. If he can't, he needs to get help.
The are high risk groups and they have been identified.These people are IV drug users and homosexuals.
Teak,
There is no need to quibble about semantics. HIV is transmitted from and to an individual, not a risk. I would argue that contracting HIV, or any sexually transmitted infection has EVERYTHING to do with who an individual has sex with, as that is how the infection is transmitted.
Ultimately it becomes a statistical issue concerning who is high or low risk, but even low risk, is a risk for those outliers.
Mitigating "risky behavior" would include knowing your partner before engaging in sexual intercourse, and limiting the number of casual sexual encounters. Certainly you can contract an STI from a monogamous relationship - but it is much less likely than from multiple casual partners. Again here, we delve into statistics.
I think most importantly we agree on the use of condoms, my point was that a condom cannot protect you from everything - particularly what the OP is suffering from at the moment.
It has nothing to do with the people one has sex with, it's the risk one takes that is the problem.
CP414347,
I guess if you learned anything from this experience, its that you don't have the stomach for one-night-stands. That's probably not a bad thing.
The real issue here is not the condom or the spermacide. Condoms and spermacide have never caused any Sexually Transmitted Infections. The issue is having sexual intercourse with an individual who in hind-sight, wasnt the "safest" or most thought out partner. Unfortunately you dont always have the luxury of knowing your partners complete sexual history - but it might be best in the future to wait and take things at a slower, more deliberate pace before having sex with them. It wouldn't have changed anything about your risk exposure in this situation, but you likely wouldnt have posted anything at all because you wouldn't be so freaked out.
Sex is big, for more reasons than just STIs. If this was your second sexual partner, you probably have a lot more on your mind about the encounter and that's what is leading to this anxiety. Sex doesn't have to be scary, just make sure its on your terms and you are "safe," meaning physically and emotionally. Wear a condom, but also don't wear your heart on your sleeve.
Common sense tells you that it does not matter. You may not have much knowledge but think about the question before you ask it because we don't keep answering question after question when you have been told you did not have a risk.
Does position, duration of intercourse, or, um, how rigorous it was factor at all? I know I'm sounding ridiculous, it's just I have so little experience. Thank you in advance.
Not LOW risk...NO risk because your condom remained intact.
You need to educate yourself about what constitutes a real risk. Nothing you did was risky. The spermicide is irrelevant, especially because it causes VAGINAL irritation, and I'm willing to bet you don't have a vagina. That has nothing to do with risk.
Condoms protect you 100% when they are intact...you have no worries.
Had the condom failed you would have known. You never had an exposure.
I don't think there's NO risk, just extremely low risk. What about what I was saying about the N-9 being on the condom? Non-issue with one-time intercourse?
figured you KNEW that PROTECTED sex = NO risk.
I did have sex with her though (using a condom though).
"She did masturbate me after rubbing her clit before intercourse as well as before our third re-try at intercourse."
hiv transmission takes place INSIDE the body...when a penis is INSIDE a vagina / anus.
you had no risk
No risk from masturbation under any circumstance. And you're welcome.
She did masturbate me after rubbing her clit before intercourse as well as before our third re-try at intercourse. I know I'm being ridiculous, it's just this was my first encounter like this and given her sexual history I am concerned after-the-fact. Thanks again for your help man.
Yes,you are fine.At no time was your penis exposed.
I actually used more than one. I had lost my erection after about ten minutes (I think it was the booze, although I wasn't drunk at all), so tried to get hard again, put another on, still couldn't go, then tried again, and then had to give up. I checked all three after she left and no breaks at all so far as I could tell. I did finger her for a while before intercourse, as well as during my second attempt to get erect again. Still think I'm fine?
If the condom didn't break then you had no risk.Simple as that.