Stay positve and all wil be fine? Get real

[Sam Hall]

I'm agreat proponent of positive attitude and how strong it is in combating many of the things that life throws up for us.However that differs from standing on a rairoad track with **it eating grin saying " here comes agreat growth experience". In pure medical-babble there are no withdrawls from tx because they define it as a craving for the drug(highly unlikely). But there are many many reports of long term non-prexsting depression,nervedamage(pripheral neropaphy)lupus further liver damage auto-imune liver damage and more. Now of coure you can argue that this is nt caused by withdrawl but i believe this misses the holistic meaning of treatmeant part of wich is "what occours at the point when chemo-therapy is withdrawn. The answers are unclear and causitive explanations are inadequate. On withdrawl of treatmeant there are no clear or certain expectations to say stay positive etc is TRITE in the extreme. Tell it to those whos experences have left them debilitated and suffering mental health problems. Positivity is superb for many but by no stretch of the imagination all.

[ringeding]

david, i am sorry for your struggle.....please keep writing as well, and allow yourself this forum to hopefully offer comfort, wisdom and support....you are in my thoughts


sam hall........would that be you paul darlin?????..(it was the buffalo!!!!)..........i truely am so deeply sorry , i know you are left with many disturbing and difficult side and after effects....i wish i knew what to tell you...my heart breaks for those that still struggle so very much even after tx.....please know you are thought of often and i do so hope you begin to feel better soon......its a tough, difficult, long road....please don't stop expressing the difficulty you are experiencing....it is important for all to know that not everyone has an easy time of it post tx.....

huge hugs guys!!!

kimmy

[honey1616]

I'm so glad you posted!  Your dad is lucky to have you caring for him and in order for you to do this,,,,You definitely need to make a plan to get yourself back in good health mental and physical.  I know what it is like to be caregiver for children and/or our aging parents and it can be a double whammy at times. But,,,,we have to take care of ourselves first in order to be able to help others.  I do know what you mean about visiting hospitals, drs and it does get very old when we are having aches and pains due to hep c. You really do need a dr to work with your depression and fatigue and then to work towards starting tx when in better frame of mind.  Getting rid of this disease = Good Health for us in are aging years!  We do care and I will pray for you in this difficult journey!

[Struggler]

I wish I could beleive that. Thanks for the thought.

[Tallblonde]

I wish I had just the right words that could make you feel better.

All I have to offer is this truth:  God loves you and has a plan for your life -- including the suffering you're going through.  Trust him with all your heart and soul.

Don't give up David.  Seek HIS comfort and you will be blessed with the peace that passes all understanding.  

Susan

[Struggler]

I was lucky enough today to get turned down for two different Clinicle trials in one day. If I lied about a couple of things I might have had a chance. I'm trying to get my life straightened out and then all hopes get dashed. I have pain everyday, URQ, ULQ, left chest and arm, right chest, abdomnam pain, enflammed heart, enlarged spleen, uncontrolled diabeties, I shake a lot. Was scared to even think of trying treatment due to I am a care giver for my 75 year old father who has diabeties, a heart condition and is a BK amputee. I would have no support. And I have a temper. I can't even mow the lawn without becoming exhausted. Sometimes it takes hours to feel right in my head when I wake up. I've come here for over a year. I walked off my job in late Febuary, I had stressed out to much. My job was all deadlines which natrally always get moved up. Had daily pain from 8/03 to now lost 40 lbs because I couldn't eat (it was spare weight). Was suicidal for a while too then, also been involunarally commited twice. Two different anti-d's didn't work, Lexapro and Prozac, I even cry watching touching sences on TV.  My biopsy was a Stage 3 Grade 3 geno 1A &1B viral loads at just over a million. I'm a loner and I don't actually like even posting. I just hoping getting this off my chest will help me from spiraling out of control. Because this time I don't think I will make it. I hate doctors and going to their offices and forget hospitals, I panic at the thought. I couldn't beleive I got has far as I did in even going to the hospitals. I am sorry for my rant everyone has there problems here I know.


David

[sofarsogood]

3a, 1.1 mill VL @ start. Did full dose combo for Genotype. Off meds for 3 weeks now. Hgb hit 8.6 in March. Still managed with only iron supplements although did decrease Riba to 800 from 1200 for short time. Then bumped up to 1000. It is different being off meds. Extreme fatique secondary to bone marrow suppression is still present, my gut is coming around, that was aweful issue during tx. Going to take a while to build up my counts. The tongue tip has lost ability to taste sweets now that I am off. Beginning to do light exercise (very lite!)

Ya know this reads crazy but I craved that **** only for a short time afterward. Never had hx of depression and managed to get through tx without an antidepressant. Was up to 2.5 mg of ativan a day. It was my sleeper and something to take the wind out of my sail when I needed it. I had some rough times emotionally while on tx. Developed GERD and had issues with esophagitis. Started on proton pump inhibiter but took very few secondary to these drugs being given cautiously in people with liver dz. Zofren is a great anti-nausea drug without sedating effects. I too wonder about long term effects of these two nasty meds. I am a registered nurse. I cannot dwell on this issue too much. It is time to move on. I obtained responder status with undetectable VL at 13 and 23 weeks. LFTs came back to normalize within weeks of starting tx.

I guess if you take one thread out of my rambling above it is this. Have courage, fight through the rough times. Find support wherever you can with family or a friend. Hang tough!! It is hard, very hard on some of us, hang in there.

My best always all. Thank you for all your help. I used to sign in as The Gaffer but had to change handles when new applications were added to my puter.

Praying for SVR status. Also all, speak to your body. Tell it to heal in Jesus name. It is the old principle of "calling that which is not, that which is." The most powerful message I can convey.

Dale