Dating and Disclosing

[sisterbabymama]

I just told my new boyfriend that I'm HCV+. He totally freaked out and gave me the boot. He's all paranoid thinking he's already getting sick and has whipped himself up into quite a froth over the whole thing. (And this from a medical professional!) Yes, I should have told him before we had sex the first time. But I didn't think I was deceiving or victimizing him, given my understanding about the risk of transmission being so low and the fact that we have been using condoms for all but the first couple of times. My question is this: When you are dating, when should you disclose your diagnosis? Do you have any experiences you can share? Any tips for dating with Hep-C are greatly appreciated. (P.S. I'm better off without him - his only concern was for himself.)

[dointime]

To put this in perspective, here in Europe somebody has already been convicted and jailed for knowingly infecting a partner with HIV and HCV.  It's a serious offence if it can be shown that you were aware and still put another person at risk.

  

[dointime]

I don't know how.  I think that every person and situation are different and you just have to play that one by ear.  

As to when to tell - I'd say that you definitely tell before ANY body fluids are exchanged.  Me, I couldn't have sex with somebody even with a condom without telling first.  I would tell whether or not I believed that the activity was safe, out of consideration for the peace of mind of my partner.  Ultimately ofcourse it's for my peace of mind too.  I don't want a partner freaking out on me but if that still did happen then at least I'd know that I had done nothing wrong, had given him the choice and had definitely not infected him.  It's my self-respect at stake here as much as anything.  

Jim - you are right on with the full monty STD panel.  I used to ask a long-term partner to do a mutual HIV test with me but now that I know about some of the nasties that are out there well ....... maybe we could just drink tea instead of getting all biological?  

dointime.    

[charm27]

I think if you dating someone and know it will be serious...you just tell him that you have a blood borne disease that was contracted by blood. I would mention also that there is only a 3-5% chance of getting this sexually.

there's one one way- to spit it out and tell the truth. Its a disease----just like all the rest.
Unforunately this one is totally mis- interpreted by ignorance and knowledge.

[sisterbabymama]

Let me try asking my question again: Does anyone have any tips or suggestions about how and when to broach this subject when dating?

[nygirl7]

Lots of stuff you can catch out there other than Hep C,


hahahahah  I wouldn't say I'm a 'fan' (actually I haven't had the opportunity post tx to find out) but that is so true.  It's not until finding out you have hep that you realize how many other things and how easy it is to get them it REALLY is.  How many of us didn't even know we had THIS for over 20 years?

Some scary stuff.

[jmjm530]

As we all know, interferon can enhance pre-existing conditions.