Aa
Joke of the day
An elderly woman walked into the Bank one morning with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because, she said, she had a lot of money.
After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is always right) an employee took the elderly woman to the president's office.
The president of the Bank asked her how much she wanted to deposit. She placed her purse on his desk and replied, '$165,000'. The president was curious and asked her how she had been able to save so much money. The elderly woman replied that she made bets.
The president was surprised and asked, 'What kind of bets?'
The elderly woman replied, 'Well, I bet you $25,000 that your testicles are square.'
The president started to laugh and told the woman that it was impossible to win a bet like that.
The woman never batted an eye. She just looked at the president and said, 'Would you like to take my bet?'
'Certainly', replied the president. 'I bet you $25,000 that my testicles are not square.'
'Done', the elderly woman answered. 'But given the amount of money involved, if you don't mind I would like to come back at 10 o' clock tomorrow morning with my lawyer as a witness.' 'No problem', said the president of the Bank confidently..
That night, the president became very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of the mirror examining his testicles, turning them this way and that, checking them over again and a gain until he was positive that no one could consider his testicles as square and reassuring himself that there was no way he could lose the bet.
The next morning at exactly 10 o'clock the elderly woman arrived at the president's office with her lawyer and acknowledged the $25,000 bet made the day before that the president's testicles were square.
The president confirmed that the bet was the same as the one made the day before.. Then the elderly woman asked him to drop his pants etc. so that she and her lawyer could see clearly.
The president was happy to oblige.
The elderly woman came closer so she could see better and asked the president if she could touch them. 'Of course', said the president. 'Given the amount of money involved, you should be 100% sure.'
The elderly woman did so with a little smile. Suddenly the president noticed that the lawyer was banging his head against the wall. He asked the elderly woman why he was doing that and she replied, 'Oh, it's probably because I bet him $100,000 that around 10 o'clock in the morning I would be holding the balls of the President of the Bank
After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is always right) an employee took the elderly woman to the president's office.
The president of the Bank asked her how much she wanted to deposit. She placed her purse on his desk and replied, '$165,000'. The president was curious and asked her how she had been able to save so much money. The elderly woman replied that she made bets.
The president was surprised and asked, 'What kind of bets?'
The elderly woman replied, 'Well, I bet you $25,000 that your testicles are square.'
The president started to laugh and told the woman that it was impossible to win a bet like that.
The woman never batted an eye. She just looked at the president and said, 'Would you like to take my bet?'
'Certainly', replied the president. 'I bet you $25,000 that my testicles are not square.'
'Done', the elderly woman answered. 'But given the amount of money involved, if you don't mind I would like to come back at 10 o' clock tomorrow morning with my lawyer as a witness.' 'No problem', said the president of the Bank confidently..
That night, the president became very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of the mirror examining his testicles, turning them this way and that, checking them over again and a gain until he was positive that no one could consider his testicles as square and reassuring himself that there was no way he could lose the bet.
The next morning at exactly 10 o'clock the elderly woman arrived at the president's office with her lawyer and acknowledged the $25,000 bet made the day before that the president's testicles were square.
The president confirmed that the bet was the same as the one made the day before.. Then the elderly woman asked him to drop his pants etc. so that she and her lawyer could see clearly.
The president was happy to oblige.
The elderly woman came closer so she could see better and asked the president if she could touch them. 'Of course', said the president. 'Given the amount of money involved, you should be 100% sure.'
The elderly woman did so with a little smile. Suddenly the president noticed that the lawyer was banging his head against the wall. He asked the elderly woman why he was doing that and she replied, 'Oh, it's probably because I bet him $100,000 that around 10 o'clock in the morning I would be holding the balls of the President of the Bank
Here are some groaners......
1. The roundest knight at king Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
6. Now matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'
14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'
17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
18. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
19. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
20. A backward poet writes inverse.
21. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.
22. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
23. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects!
1. The roundest knight at king Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
6. Now matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'
14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'
17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
18. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
19. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
20. A backward poet writes inverse.
21. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.
22. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
23. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects!
A man and a woman were sitting beside each other in the first class section of an airplane.
The woman sneezed, took out a tissue, wiped her nose, then visibly
shuddered for ten to fifteen seconds.
The man went back to his reading. A few minutes later, the woman sneezed again, took a tissue, wiped her nose, then shuddered violently once more.
Assuming that the woman might have a cold, the man was still curious about the shuddering.
A few more minutes passed when the woman sneezed yet again. As before she
took a tissue, wiped her nose, her body shaking even more than before.
Unable to restrain his curiosity, the man turned to the woman and said, 'I couldn't help but notice that you've sneezed three times, wiped your nose and then
shuddered violently.
Are you OK?'
'I am sorry if I disturbed you, I have a very rare medical condition; whenever I sneeze I have an orgasm.
The man, more than a bit embarrassed, was still curious. I have never heard of that condition before' he said 'Are you taking anything for it?'
The woman nodded, 'Pepper.'
The woman sneezed, took out a tissue, wiped her nose, then visibly
shuddered for ten to fifteen seconds.
The man went back to his reading. A few minutes later, the woman sneezed again, took a tissue, wiped her nose, then shuddered violently once more.
Assuming that the woman might have a cold, the man was still curious about the shuddering.
A few more minutes passed when the woman sneezed yet again. As before she
took a tissue, wiped her nose, her body shaking even more than before.
Unable to restrain his curiosity, the man turned to the woman and said, 'I couldn't help but notice that you've sneezed three times, wiped your nose and then
shuddered violently.
Are you OK?'
'I am sorry if I disturbed you, I have a very rare medical condition; whenever I sneeze I have an orgasm.
The man, more than a bit embarrassed, was still curious. I have never heard of that condition before' he said 'Are you taking anything for it?'
The woman nodded, 'Pepper.'
An English Lesson
For my 75th birthday, I got a gift certificate from my
wife.
The certificate paid for a visit to a witch doctor living on a
nearby reservation in Unasville who was rumored to have a magic,
wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction.
After being persuaded, I drove to the reservation, handed my ticket to the witch doctor, and wondered what he was going to do. The old witch doctor slowly,
methodically produced a potion, handed it to me, and with a grip on my
shoulder, warned, "This is powerful medicine and it must be respected".
"You take only a teaspoonful and then say '1-2-3". 'When you do that,
you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life and you
can perform as long as you want.
" I was encouraged. As he walked away, I turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?"
"Your partner must say '1-2-3-4 ", he responded.
"When she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon".
I was eager to see if it worked. I went home, showered, shaved, took
a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited my wife to join me in the
bedroom. When she came in, I took off my clothes and said, "1-2-3".
Immediately, I was the manliest of men.
My wife was excited and began hurriedly taking off her clothes. But then she asked, "What's the 1-2-3 for?"
And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end
our sentences with a preposition!
For my 75th birthday, I got a gift certificate from my
wife.
The certificate paid for a visit to a witch doctor living on a
nearby reservation in Unasville who was rumored to have a magic,
wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction.
After being persuaded, I drove to the reservation, handed my ticket to the witch doctor, and wondered what he was going to do. The old witch doctor slowly,
methodically produced a potion, handed it to me, and with a grip on my
shoulder, warned, "This is powerful medicine and it must be respected".
"You take only a teaspoonful and then say '1-2-3". 'When you do that,
you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life and you
can perform as long as you want.
" I was encouraged. As he walked away, I turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?"
"Your partner must say '1-2-3-4 ", he responded.
"When she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon".
I was eager to see if it worked. I went home, showered, shaved, took
a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited my wife to join me in the
bedroom. When she came in, I took off my clothes and said, "1-2-3".
Immediately, I was the manliest of men.
My wife was excited and began hurriedly taking off her clothes. But then she asked, "What's the 1-2-3 for?"
And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end
our sentences with a preposition!
Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.
Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.
Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.
Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.
Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'I'll serve
you, but don't start anything.
you, but don't start anything.
An Irish woman of advanced age visited her physician to ask his advice
In reviving her husband's libido. "What about trying Viagra?"
asked
the
doctor. "Not a chance," she said. "He won't even take an
aspirin."
"Not a problem," replied the doctor. "Give him an 'Irish
Viagra.' It's
when you drop the Viagra tablet into his coffee. He won't even taste
it. Give it a try and call me in a week to let me know how things
went."
It wasn't a week later when she called the doctor, who directly
inquired as to her progress. The poor dear exclaimed, "Oh, faith,
bejaysus and begorrah! T'was horrid! Just terrible, doctor!"
"Really, what happened?" asked the doctor. "Well, I did as you
advised
and slipped it in his coffee and the effect was almost immediate. He
jumped straight up, with a
twinkle in his eye and with his pants a-bulging fiercely! With one
swoop of his arm, he sent me cups and tablecloth flying, ripped me
clothes
to tatters and took me then and there passionately on the tabletop!
It was a nightmare, I tell you, an absolute nightmare!"
"Why so terrible?" asked the doctor, "Do you mean the s ex your
husband
provided wasn't good?" "Twas the best s ex I've had in 25
years! But
sure as I'm sittin' here, I'll never be able to show me face in
Starbucks again!"
I think spring's was awesome!!! LMAO!
I also love all these jokes...
I now have fodder for work... LMAO!
Meki
I also love all these jokes...
I now have fodder for work... LMAO!
Meki
A very shy young man goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting alone.
After an hour he gathers enough courage to go and ask her,
"Er... excuse me, but would you mind if I sat here beside you?"
She responds in a loud voice :
"NO, I DON'T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!"
Everyone in the bar turns to stare at them.
The young man is surprised, shocked and embarrassed and goes back to his table.
After a few minutes the woman walks over to him smiles, apologizes, and says,
"You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing situations."
The young man responds loudly with,
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN FIVE THOUSAND RUPEES. FOR ONE NIGHT ? ! THATS TOO MUCH !"
After an hour he gathers enough courage to go and ask her,
"Er... excuse me, but would you mind if I sat here beside you?"
She responds in a loud voice :
"NO, I DON'T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!"
Everyone in the bar turns to stare at them.
The young man is surprised, shocked and embarrassed and goes back to his table.
After a few minutes the woman walks over to him smiles, apologizes, and says,
"You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing situations."
The young man responds loudly with,
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN FIVE THOUSAND RUPEES. FOR ONE NIGHT ? ! THATS TOO MUCH !"
http://www.cartoonbank.com/product_details.asp?mscssid=QFW56L2K8RR08MQBQUJ6SPS4TXLTF1X0&sitetype=1&did=4&sid=125592&pid=&keyword=chronic+disease§ion=all&title=undefined&whichpage=1&sortBy=popular
Will I live to see 80?
I recently picked a new primary care doctor. After two visits and
exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing 'fairly well' for my age.
A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him,
'Do you think I'll live to be 80?'
He asked, 'Do you smoke tobacco, or drink beer or wine?
''Oh no,' I replied. 'I'm not doing drugs, either!'
Then he asked, > 'Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?'
I said, 'No, my former doctor said that all red meat is very
unhealthy! '
Do you spend a lot of time in the sun?
'No, I don' t,' I said.
He asked, 'Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sexual partners?'
'No,' I said.
He looked at me and said, 'Then, why do you even give a sh*t?
I recently picked a new primary care doctor. After two visits and
exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing 'fairly well' for my age.
A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him,
'Do you think I'll live to be 80?'
He asked, 'Do you smoke tobacco, or drink beer or wine?
''Oh no,' I replied. 'I'm not doing drugs, either!'
Then he asked, > 'Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?'
I said, 'No, my former doctor said that all red meat is very
unhealthy! '
Do you spend a lot of time in the sun?
'No, I don' t,' I said.
He asked, 'Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sexual partners?'
'No,' I said.
He looked at me and said, 'Then, why do you even give a sh*t?
One morning John pinched his wife's bottom and said "if you firmed this up we could get rid of your girdle". Betsy bit her tongue.
The next morning John pinched Betsy's breast and said "if you firmed these up we could get rid on your bra".
Betsy reached over and pinched John's penis and said "if you firmed this up we could get rid of the pool man, the yard man and your Brother".
The next morning John pinched Betsy's breast and said "if you firmed these up we could get rid on your bra".
Betsy reached over and pinched John's penis and said "if you firmed this up we could get rid of the pool man, the yard man and your Brother".
Well, if you can't laugh at the election process, what can you laugh at? Thanks for the jokes. Keep it up - they really brighten things up. Hope you are well in NJ. Get a "slice" for me. :-)
Maybe this isn't a joke technically, but this JibJAb (if you haven't already seen it) is pretty funny!
http://www.peteyandpetunia.com/VoteHere/VoteHere.htm
http://www.peteyandpetunia.com/VoteHere/VoteHere.htm
A preacher was making his rounds on a bicycle, when he came upon a little
boy trying to sell a lawn mower.
'How much do you want for the mower?' asked the preacher.
'I just want enough money to go out and buy me a bicycle,' said the little boy.
After a moment of consideration, the preacher asked, Will you take my bike in trade for it?'
The little boy asked if he could try it out first, and, after riding the bike around a little while, said, 'Mister, you've got yourself a deal.'
The preacher took the mower and began to crank it. He pulled on the rope a few times with no response from the mower.
The preacher called the little boy over and said , 'I can't get this mower to start.'
The little boy said, 'That's because you have to cuss at it to get it started.'
The preacher said, I can't cuss. It's been so long since I became a Christian that I don't even remember how to cuss.'
The little boy looked at him happily and said, 'You just keep pulling on that rope. It'll come back to ya.
boy trying to sell a lawn mower.
'How much do you want for the mower?' asked the preacher.
'I just want enough money to go out and buy me a bicycle,' said the little boy.
After a moment of consideration, the preacher asked, Will you take my bike in trade for it?'
The little boy asked if he could try it out first, and, after riding the bike around a little while, said, 'Mister, you've got yourself a deal.'
The preacher took the mower and began to crank it. He pulled on the rope a few times with no response from the mower.
The preacher called the little boy over and said , 'I can't get this mower to start.'
The little boy said, 'That's because you have to cuss at it to get it started.'
The preacher said, I can't cuss. It's been so long since I became a Christian that I don't even remember how to cuss.'
The little boy looked at him happily and said, 'You just keep pulling on that rope. It'll come back to ya.
Three football fans were out for a ride when one noticed a foot
sticking out of the bushes by the side of the road. They stopped and
discovered a nude female, dead drunk.
Out of respect and propriety, the Eagles fan took off his cap and
placed it over her right breast.
The Giants fan took off his cap and placed it over her left breast.
Following their lead, but with some grumbling, the Dallas Cowboy fan
took off his cap and placed it over her girly part.
The police were called and when the officer arrived, he conducted his
inspection. First, he lifted up the Eagles cap, replaced it, and wrote
down some notes.
Next, he lifted the Giants cap, replaced it, and wrote down some more
notes.
The officer then lifted the Cowboys cap, replaced it, then lifted it
again, replaced it, lifted it a third time, and replaced it one last
time. The Cowboys fan was becoming annoyed and finally asked, 'What are
you, a pervert or something? Why do you keep lifting and looking,
lifting and looking?
'Well,' said the officer, 'I am simply surprised. Normally when I
look under a Dallas Cowboys hat, I find an a$$hole.
LET THE FOOTBALL SEASON BEGIN!!!
sticking out of the bushes by the side of the road. They stopped and
discovered a nude female, dead drunk.
Out of respect and propriety, the Eagles fan took off his cap and
placed it over her right breast.
The Giants fan took off his cap and placed it over her left breast.
Following their lead, but with some grumbling, the Dallas Cowboy fan
took off his cap and placed it over her girly part.
The police were called and when the officer arrived, he conducted his
inspection. First, he lifted up the Eagles cap, replaced it, and wrote
down some notes.
Next, he lifted the Giants cap, replaced it, and wrote down some more
notes.
The officer then lifted the Cowboys cap, replaced it, then lifted it
again, replaced it, lifted it a third time, and replaced it one last
time. The Cowboys fan was becoming annoyed and finally asked, 'What are
you, a pervert or something? Why do you keep lifting and looking,
lifting and looking?
'Well,' said the officer, 'I am simply surprised. Normally when I
look under a Dallas Cowboys hat, I find an a$$hole.
LET THE FOOTBALL SEASON BEGIN!!!
It is hard to find a joke today without a dirty word or two in it, but
here is one: Yes, it is true, I am sending a joke that is very funny
and does not contain a single dirty word.
Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A
small tree begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the
birch, Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch? The birch says he cannot tell.
Just then a woodpecker lands on the little sapling. The birch says,
Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a
beech or a son of a birch?
The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree. He replies, It is
neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch. It is, however, the
best piece of ash I have ever put my ****** in.
Wipe that smile off your face!!!
here is one: Yes, it is true, I am sending a joke that is very funny
and does not contain a single dirty word.
Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A
small tree begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the
birch, Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch? The birch says he cannot tell.
Just then a woodpecker lands on the little sapling. The birch says,
Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a
beech or a son of a birch?
The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree. He replies, It is
neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch. It is, however, the
best piece of ash I have ever put my ****** in.
Wipe that smile off your face!!!
A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her.
Suddenly she sneez es, and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket toward the man. He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back.
"Oh my, I am so sorry," the woman says as she pops her eye back in place.
"Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you," she says.
They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they go to the theatre followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and
he shares his. She listens.
After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap and stay for breakfast. They had a wonderful, wonderful time.
The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed. Everything had been SO incredible!
"You know," he said, "you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?"
"No," she replies. . .
She says:
"You just happened to catch my eye."
Suddenly she sneez es, and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket toward the man. He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back.
"Oh my, I am so sorry," the woman says as she pops her eye back in place.
"Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you," she says.
They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they go to the theatre followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and
he shares his. She listens.
After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap and stay for breakfast. They had a wonderful, wonderful time.
The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed. Everything had been SO incredible!
"You know," he said, "you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?"
"No," she replies. . .
She says:
"You just happened to catch my eye."
Whoops! Sorry, about the last line there. Thought you were male, and just checked your profile - you're a girl! my BAD, madam!
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs are roaming in the forest when they come across a lake. The water was enticing and Snow White decides to take a bath. So she tells the Dwarfs to turn around while she is taking a bath in the lake. The Dwarfs protest vehemently because they want to take a bath too.
Snow White relents and says "When I get into the water and you hear the splash, you can turn around." Snow White undresses and as she is about to jump into the water, at that very moment, she is startled by a frog who jumps into the water before she can. The moment the Dwarfs hear the SPLASH, they turn around and see Snow White standing NAKED.
Now, given that this incident is an idea for a TV ad, what product is being advertised?
That's easy ... Seven-Up!
FL Gator... never mind... I won't ask who threw the first punch and wear it landed.
Snow White relents and says "When I get into the water and you hear the splash, you can turn around." Snow White undresses and as she is about to jump into the water, at that very moment, she is startled by a frog who jumps into the water before she can. The moment the Dwarfs hear the SPLASH, they turn around and see Snow White standing NAKED.
Now, given that this incident is an idea for a TV ad, what product is being advertised?
That's easy ... Seven-Up!
FL Gator... never mind... I won't ask who threw the first punch and wear it landed.
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Hepatitis Social Community
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Condoms are the most effective way to prevent HIV and STDs.
PrEP is used by people with high risk to prevent HIV infection.
