Welcome to the forum. Sorry to hear of your experiences with partners' responses to your past herpes. Stories like this unfortunately are common, although probably less so now than in past years, with improved knowledge about herpes both among medical professionals and sexually active persons. In any case, I'm glad you're now with an understanding guy. Congratulations on your current success in romance!
You probably had HSV2; genital HSV1 doesn't usually cause the frequent outbreaks you had when you were young. Most people with HSV2 do have declining outbreaks over the years, so your experience is typical. But it doesn't mean your infection is gone, and it is likely you still have periods of viral shedding, i.e. times when you are infectious for a partner without symptoms. But I would guess it's pretty infrequent, which explains why your husband apparently never caught it. (Although it's possible he did, just didn't have symptoms.)
As for your current partner, it wouldn't be surprising if he has HSV2 himself, given his past sexual lifestyle. If so, he is immune to a new infection with it. In other words, if both of you have HSV2, neither of you is at risk of catching it again from one another. Alternatively, he may not have HSV2, and you just don't shed virus very often or in amounts necessary for transmission.
What to do now? Discuss with your partner and decide together whether you should both have blood tests for HSV2 (or both HSV1 and 2). That would tell who is infected with which virus, and therefore who is susceptible or immune to the other's infection. Alternatively, with no symptoms in either of you after "hundreds" of sexual encounters, you may decide to just carry on without further worry. As for other STDs, since you're currently monogamous and his wilder lifestyle is in the distant past, it is extremely unlikely he is carrying any active STDs at this time, with the possible exception of asympomtic herpes as just discussed.
I hope this has helped. Good luck!
And it goes without saying, I hope, that there is absolutely no rational basis for you to "feel stuck and yucky about myself." This is pretty obviously an emotional reaction to the horrible treatment you received from past partners. It has nothing to do with you as a person or, really, your herpes. But if you can't shake those feelings, you would be wise to consider professional counseling about it.