Confused and very depressed about hsv1, please help!?

[Ghost6342]

i'm 16/male/gay. back in summer 2010 i met up with an older man and he gave me unprotected oral sex. I had a blood test done 2 months later because i was scared i caught hsv1 but my test came back negative. so i don't have hsv1 or hsv2. but i know that a ton of people have hsv1 (almost 80% of people) I'm just really confused and really depressed about it because i don't want to catch this virus because i have diabetes, and i don't want to catch a bunch of sores around my mouth that keep coming back. but there's this other guy i want to be with, he's very sweet and he says he cares about me and loves me, but i scared he might have hsv1 since 80% of people do. I really don't want to catch it but i still want to be with him. It's tearing me apart inside.

Basically what i think is i have 2 choices. Be single/lonely my whole life and not have anyone or get a bunch of painful sores on my mouth that never go away. Can someone please tell me that I'm wrong if i am. I literally spent 2 nights in my room crying about this.

can someone please help me.

[gracefromHHP]

best of luck! I hope you make better progress now :)

[Ghost6342]

well i just saw her again today and i told her how i felt about her not taking my problems seriously and she's willing to help :)

[gracefromHHP]

you are over 14, you can make your own medical decisions. without being in school all day it's hard to find others to talk to who have therapists to see if someone recommends one but why not just take the phone book to dinner with the folks one night and open it up to child therapists and say - I think we need to look for a new therapist for me because I have concerns I need help with and I don't feel my current therapist is helping me near enough.

[Ghost6342]

i'll see what i can do. my parents are the only ones who can find therapist for me. or i could try a hotline or forum or something.
and i know i already said this but i'm sorry for being rude earlier <3

[gracefromHHP]

you definitely need to find a therapist that you feel more comfortable with.  it's not doing you any good if you don't feel that she takes your concerns seriously and if you can't see her on a regular basis.

[Ghost6342]

yeah. i'm seeing a therapist and i tell her all of this but she dosen't help me at all. i tried to tell my parents to have me see someone else but there too dumb to find a different therapist.
i can't even see my therapist that often because she always busy :(

by the way, im sorry for snapping. i was just really upset <3