Aa
Going a little crazy…
I apologize but this is long….
I recently received a positive result of HSV-1 via PCR. I went in 5/31 because I was really sore after sex with my partner. The soreness didn’t seem normal or like any other pain or discomfort I had experienced before. The soreness was 2 or 3 days after sex and mostly by my butt. We had sex 2 weekends in a row after not having sex for a month or so (we live almost an hour apart, both have kids, full-time jobs, etc). Both weekends involved everything (vaginal, oral and anal sex).
I was fortunate to snag a last-minute cancellation with my PCP. She examined and swabbed my vagina but said everything looked normal (and was negative for gonorrhea and chlamydia but WBC Wet Prep showed Few. I showed her the spot by my butt that was sore and she said that looks like herpes and swabbed it (negative for HSV-2, positive for HSV-1). I did an 10 day dose of valacyclovir and everything cleared up. All other urine and blood tests were negative.
Obviously this was a shock because I have been with my partner since 2019. I was angry! I was married for 10 years prior to him and he was my first and only partner after my divorce. Of course I accused him of giving it to me and questioned whether he was faithful to me. He went in a week after me (a different clinic) and got tested. All his tests were urine and blood because he had no outbreak so there was nothing to swab. They called with his results and said everything was negative, including herpes. Second shock I received! How could I be positive and the person I was having sex with for the last 4 years be negative?! It has been an emotional drain, on both of us. We essentially broke up, but question if we should, but both are confused about our results and scared to even consider having sex.
I reached out to my doctor to try to get some answers or clarity on the situation. She said my test has a lesser chance of being a false positive than his does of being a false negative, because of the testing methods that each of us had. Over the weekend, he got a paper copy of his results in the mail and he sent me screenshots. English is not his first language and it was a lot of medical jargon and confusing so he didn’t understand it all. That’s when I noticed that his herpes test said:
HSV 2 IGG, W/REFL AS 2 INHIBITION (17170)
HSV 2 IGG, TYPE SPECIFIC AB
I tested positive for HSV-1 but it doesn’t look like that is what he was tested for. Is a HSV-1 IGG and a HSV-2 IGG 2 separate tests? Can that be determined from his results? Did the doctor just assume that he had HSV-2 because of my sores and positive result? Or am I just driving myself crazy trying to explain how we could have different results?
I recently received a positive result of HSV-1 via PCR. I went in 5/31 because I was really sore after sex with my partner. The soreness didn’t seem normal or like any other pain or discomfort I had experienced before. The soreness was 2 or 3 days after sex and mostly by my butt. We had sex 2 weekends in a row after not having sex for a month or so (we live almost an hour apart, both have kids, full-time jobs, etc). Both weekends involved everything (vaginal, oral and anal sex).
I was fortunate to snag a last-minute cancellation with my PCP. She examined and swabbed my vagina but said everything looked normal (and was negative for gonorrhea and chlamydia but WBC Wet Prep showed Few. I showed her the spot by my butt that was sore and she said that looks like herpes and swabbed it (negative for HSV-2, positive for HSV-1). I did an 10 day dose of valacyclovir and everything cleared up. All other urine and blood tests were negative.
Obviously this was a shock because I have been with my partner since 2019. I was angry! I was married for 10 years prior to him and he was my first and only partner after my divorce. Of course I accused him of giving it to me and questioned whether he was faithful to me. He went in a week after me (a different clinic) and got tested. All his tests were urine and blood because he had no outbreak so there was nothing to swab. They called with his results and said everything was negative, including herpes. Second shock I received! How could I be positive and the person I was having sex with for the last 4 years be negative?! It has been an emotional drain, on both of us. We essentially broke up, but question if we should, but both are confused about our results and scared to even consider having sex.
I reached out to my doctor to try to get some answers or clarity on the situation. She said my test has a lesser chance of being a false positive than his does of being a false negative, because of the testing methods that each of us had. Over the weekend, he got a paper copy of his results in the mail and he sent me screenshots. English is not his first language and it was a lot of medical jargon and confusing so he didn’t understand it all. That’s when I noticed that his herpes test said:
HSV 2 IGG, W/REFL AS 2 INHIBITION (17170)
HSV 2 IGG, TYPE SPECIFIC AB
I tested positive for HSV-1 but it doesn’t look like that is what he was tested for. Is a HSV-1 IGG and a HSV-2 IGG 2 separate tests? Can that be determined from his results? Did the doctor just assume that he had HSV-2 because of my sores and positive result? Or am I just driving myself crazy trying to explain how we could have different results?
COMMUNITY LEADER
Okay, so get comfy because it's going to get a bit complicated.
First, let me say that I see no reason to think he was unfaithful if this is the only reason to think he was. I'll explain why, but let me put that out there so you can read the rest calmly.
You have genital hsv1. That's been established by your PCR swab. (And congrats to your doctor for doing the best available test there is on sores. Really. Not many docs know to do that.)
You got this genitally from oral sex, almost certainly. It is almost never transmitted genitally to genitally.
Now, for the blood testing. Our blood tests suck. That's about as nicely as I can put it here. Our hsv2 tests are slightly better than the hsv1 tests, and our hsv1 tests really, really suck.
The hsv1 IgG test (and yes, they are type specific) miss a full 30% of infections. Your partner could have a well-established infection and the blood test could easily miss it. He could have gotten it as a child and the blood test might not pick it up.
The other lousy part of this - as far as figuring this out - is that about 90% of people with oral hsv1 never get a single symptom, so unless they test and get an accurate test result, they don't even know they have it.
They are still infectious and can transmit it, even without symptoms, but they won't know they have it until they transmit it.
Did you get an hsv1 IgG blood test? Was it positive? It's also possible that you've had it for a long time, and just didn't know it, too. There are many people who get an outbreak, don't know it's herpes, and think it's something else, and then don't get another one for years and years. Some, especially with genital hsv1, never get another one.
If you and your partner decide to get back together, and if it's an otherwise good relationship, I hope you do, there will likely be little impact on your relationship from this.
Since it's ghsv1, you are unlikely to ever transmit this. If you got it from him, he has antibodies that give him strong protection against getting it in another location.
If you got it before him, that means you've had it for more than 2 years. We know that ghsv1 sheds about 4 days a year after having it for 2 years outside of outbreaks. Again, this means you are unlikely to ever transmit it, and even if he doesn't have hsv1, he's not at any real risk of getting it from you.
You can read more about shedding in the Herpes Handbook at https://westoverheights.com/herpes/the-updated-herpes-handbook/. It's free and you can read it on any device. It's geared mostly to hsv2, but the shedding info is good for anyone.
I hope I didn't confuse you too much, but let me know what questions you have.
First, let me say that I see no reason to think he was unfaithful if this is the only reason to think he was. I'll explain why, but let me put that out there so you can read the rest calmly.
You have genital hsv1. That's been established by your PCR swab. (And congrats to your doctor for doing the best available test there is on sores. Really. Not many docs know to do that.)
You got this genitally from oral sex, almost certainly. It is almost never transmitted genitally to genitally.
Now, for the blood testing. Our blood tests suck. That's about as nicely as I can put it here. Our hsv2 tests are slightly better than the hsv1 tests, and our hsv1 tests really, really suck.
The hsv1 IgG test (and yes, they are type specific) miss a full 30% of infections. Your partner could have a well-established infection and the blood test could easily miss it. He could have gotten it as a child and the blood test might not pick it up.
The other lousy part of this - as far as figuring this out - is that about 90% of people with oral hsv1 never get a single symptom, so unless they test and get an accurate test result, they don't even know they have it.
They are still infectious and can transmit it, even without symptoms, but they won't know they have it until they transmit it.
Did you get an hsv1 IgG blood test? Was it positive? It's also possible that you've had it for a long time, and just didn't know it, too. There are many people who get an outbreak, don't know it's herpes, and think it's something else, and then don't get another one for years and years. Some, especially with genital hsv1, never get another one.
If you and your partner decide to get back together, and if it's an otherwise good relationship, I hope you do, there will likely be little impact on your relationship from this.
Since it's ghsv1, you are unlikely to ever transmit this. If you got it from him, he has antibodies that give him strong protection against getting it in another location.
If you got it before him, that means you've had it for more than 2 years. We know that ghsv1 sheds about 4 days a year after having it for 2 years outside of outbreaks. Again, this means you are unlikely to ever transmit it, and even if he doesn't have hsv1, he's not at any real risk of getting it from you.
You can read more about shedding in the Herpes Handbook at https://westoverheights.com/herpes/the-updated-herpes-handbook/. It's free and you can read it on any device. It's geared mostly to hsv2, but the shedding info is good for anyone.
I hope I didn't confuse you too much, but let me know what questions you have.
4 Comments
Thanks for taking the time to provide such a detailed explanation. I find all of it confusing as a native English-speaker so it’s not surprising that it’s difficult to explain to a non-native speaker.
You said that this is likely an oral herpes that was passed to me. But that doesn’t necessarily mean that my partner passed it to me? I could have had it for years and not known and the timing of my outbreak is just convenient? Not only do I need to try to understand this (and my doctor, who did do the correct test on me and is very thorough, says I should schedule an appointment if I have more questions but has no openings until the beginning of August) but I need to try to explain it to someone else that does not understand at all. And I don’t blame him. This sounds like it is straight out of a sci-fi movie or a totally made up explanation. If I didn’t understand as much as I do, I would think the same thing.
I did not have the blood HSV-1 test, just the swab. His was a Quest Diagnostics HSV-2 blood test. I am not even sure what the benefit would be of a blood test for me since I already got a positive PCR.
Here is what I am still trying to understand/explain:
- there is no way to determine when I got it?
- there is no way to determine who got it first but it likely wasn’t me because mine is genital?
- or it could have been me and I passed it to him?
- how do I explain the difference and the way it spreads?
- do you know of any good resources in Spanish that would easily explain all of this?
You said that this is likely an oral herpes that was passed to me. But that doesn’t necessarily mean that my partner passed it to me? I could have had it for years and not known and the timing of my outbreak is just convenient? Not only do I need to try to understand this (and my doctor, who did do the correct test on me and is very thorough, says I should schedule an appointment if I have more questions but has no openings until the beginning of August) but I need to try to explain it to someone else that does not understand at all. And I don’t blame him. This sounds like it is straight out of a sci-fi movie or a totally made up explanation. If I didn’t understand as much as I do, I would think the same thing.
I did not have the blood HSV-1 test, just the swab. His was a Quest Diagnostics HSV-2 blood test. I am not even sure what the benefit would be of a blood test for me since I already got a positive PCR.
Here is what I am still trying to understand/explain:
- there is no way to determine when I got it?
- there is no way to determine who got it first but it likely wasn’t me because mine is genital?
- or it could have been me and I passed it to him?
- how do I explain the difference and the way it spreads?
- do you know of any good resources in Spanish that would easily explain all of this?
"But that doesn’t necessarily mean that my partner passed it to me?"
Yes, a partner passed it to you via oral sex. However, now that it's genital, it will be very unlikely for you to transmit it to someone else.
Herpes has site preferences. Hsv1 prefers the mouth. Hsv2 prefers the genitals.
When herpes is in it's preferred location, it's more active. When it's more active, you'll get more outbreaks, it will shed more, and therefore, it will transmit more.
The only thing a blood test would do is tell you if you have antibodies already. If you have antibodies, you've had the virus for maybe at least 12 weeks. (Some develop them sooner.)
Your partner's tests were for HSV2 only. I don't know why he didn't get an HSV1 test. HIs hsv2 tests were for hsv2 antibodies, and an inhibition test, which is done if the test comes back positive, to confirm that.
-there is no way to determine when I got it?
The only way to determine that is if you have hsv1 antibodies, but as I explained, the hsv1 blood test sucks, so it's not a reliable way to know.
- there is no way to determine who got it first but it likely wasn’t me because mine is genital?
See above on the test.
- or it could have been me and I passed it to him?
It is VERY, VERY unlikely that if you have it genitally, and he has it orally, that you passed it to him. That would be just a coincidence that you both have it.
- how do I explain the difference and the way it spreads?
- do you know of any good resources in Spanish that would easily explain all of this?
For both of these, the Herpes Handbook is available in Spanish.
https://westoverheights.com/herpes/the-updated-herpes-handbook/
Google Chrome translates things to Spanish. I don't know how well it would translate this, but try it, maybe. I'll put this into Google Translate for you.
________
"¿Pero eso no significa necesariamente que mi pareja me lo pasó?"
Sí, una pareja te lo transmitió a través del sexo oral. Sin embargo, ahora que es genital, será muy poco probable que lo transmitas a otra persona.
Herpes tiene preferencias de sitio. Hsv1 prefiere la boca. Hsv2 prefiere los genitales.
Cuando el herpes está en su ubicación preferida, es más activo. Cuando esté más activo, obtendrá más brotes, arrojará más y, por lo tanto, transmitirá más.
Lo único que haría un análisis de sangre es decirle si ya tiene anticuerpos. Si tiene anticuerpos, ha tenido el virus durante al menos 12 semanas. (Algunos los desarrollan antes).
Las pruebas de su pareja fueron solo para HSV2. No sé por qué no se hizo la prueba del HSV1. Las pruebas HI hsv2 fueron para anticuerpos hsv2 y una prueba de inhibición, que se realiza si la prueba resulta positiva, para confirmarlo.
-¿No hay manera de determinar cuándo lo obtuve?
La única forma de determinarlo es si tiene anticuerpos contra el hsv1, pero como expliqué, el análisis de sangre del hsv1 apesta, por lo que no es una forma confiable de saberlo.
- no hay forma de determinar quién lo recibió primero, pero probablemente no fui yo porque el mío es genital.
Ver arriba en la prueba.
- o pude haber sido yo y se lo pasé?
Es MUY, MUY improbable que si lo tienes genitalmente, y él lo tiene oralmente, se lo pases. Eso sería solo una coincidencia que ambos lo tengan.
- ¿Cómo explico la diferencia y la forma en que se propaga?
- ¿Conoces algún buen recurso en español que explique fácilmente todo esto?
Para ambos, el Manual del herpes está disponible en español.
https://westoverheights.com/herpes/the-updated-herpes-handbook/
Google Chrome traduce cosas al español. No sé qué tan bien traduciría esto, pero inténtalo, tal vez. Pondré esto en Google Translate para ti.
Yes, a partner passed it to you via oral sex. However, now that it's genital, it will be very unlikely for you to transmit it to someone else.
Herpes has site preferences. Hsv1 prefers the mouth. Hsv2 prefers the genitals.
When herpes is in it's preferred location, it's more active. When it's more active, you'll get more outbreaks, it will shed more, and therefore, it will transmit more.
The only thing a blood test would do is tell you if you have antibodies already. If you have antibodies, you've had the virus for maybe at least 12 weeks. (Some develop them sooner.)
Your partner's tests were for HSV2 only. I don't know why he didn't get an HSV1 test. HIs hsv2 tests were for hsv2 antibodies, and an inhibition test, which is done if the test comes back positive, to confirm that.
-there is no way to determine when I got it?
The only way to determine that is if you have hsv1 antibodies, but as I explained, the hsv1 blood test sucks, so it's not a reliable way to know.
- there is no way to determine who got it first but it likely wasn’t me because mine is genital?
See above on the test.
- or it could have been me and I passed it to him?
It is VERY, VERY unlikely that if you have it genitally, and he has it orally, that you passed it to him. That would be just a coincidence that you both have it.
- how do I explain the difference and the way it spreads?
- do you know of any good resources in Spanish that would easily explain all of this?
For both of these, the Herpes Handbook is available in Spanish.
https://westoverheights.com/herpes/the-updated-herpes-handbook/
Google Chrome translates things to Spanish. I don't know how well it would translate this, but try it, maybe. I'll put this into Google Translate for you.
________
"¿Pero eso no significa necesariamente que mi pareja me lo pasó?"
Sí, una pareja te lo transmitió a través del sexo oral. Sin embargo, ahora que es genital, será muy poco probable que lo transmitas a otra persona.
Herpes tiene preferencias de sitio. Hsv1 prefiere la boca. Hsv2 prefiere los genitales.
Cuando el herpes está en su ubicación preferida, es más activo. Cuando esté más activo, obtendrá más brotes, arrojará más y, por lo tanto, transmitirá más.
Lo único que haría un análisis de sangre es decirle si ya tiene anticuerpos. Si tiene anticuerpos, ha tenido el virus durante al menos 12 semanas. (Algunos los desarrollan antes).
Las pruebas de su pareja fueron solo para HSV2. No sé por qué no se hizo la prueba del HSV1. Las pruebas HI hsv2 fueron para anticuerpos hsv2 y una prueba de inhibición, que se realiza si la prueba resulta positiva, para confirmarlo.
-¿No hay manera de determinar cuándo lo obtuve?
La única forma de determinarlo es si tiene anticuerpos contra el hsv1, pero como expliqué, el análisis de sangre del hsv1 apesta, por lo que no es una forma confiable de saberlo.
- no hay forma de determinar quién lo recibió primero, pero probablemente no fui yo porque el mío es genital.
Ver arriba en la prueba.
- o pude haber sido yo y se lo pasé?
Es MUY, MUY improbable que si lo tienes genitalmente, y él lo tiene oralmente, se lo pases. Eso sería solo una coincidencia que ambos lo tengan.
- ¿Cómo explico la diferencia y la forma en que se propaga?
- ¿Conoces algún buen recurso en español que explique fácilmente todo esto?
Para ambos, el Manual del herpes está disponible en español.
https://westoverheights.com/herpes/the-updated-herpes-handbook/
Google Chrome traduce cosas al español. No sé qué tan bien traduciría esto, pero inténtalo, tal vez. Pondré esto en Google Translate para ti.
Hi, thanks again for your response. I knew a partner gave it to me, I just wasn’t sure if it could be attributed to my current partner. But based on the information that you provided, it doesn’t seem so. He could get a HSV-1 test and if positive, he has likely had it for more than 12 weeks. Or I could get one and see if I had antibodies, which would tell us the same thing. If we both had antibodies, then it wouldn’t really tell us anything other than we both have it.
It was a bit disappointing that my doctor didn’t explain this further. All the information you have provided has been super helpful and has relieved some of my stress about this.
It was a bit disappointing that my doctor didn’t explain this further. All the information you have provided has been super helpful and has relieved some of my stress about this.
Oh it could easily be attributed to your current partner. It could also be attributed to a previous partner - you might never know.
In the end, it doesn't mean they cheated. It doesn't mean someone did anything wrong, other than they probably just didn't know.
Doctors often don't know this stuff. Of all of the things they have to keep up with, herpes falls way to the bottom because it's so common, and they think it never changes.
If you end up going back with your current partner, even if he didn't give it to you, it won't have any impact on your relationship. You'd be really unlikely to transmit it outside of symptoms, so just avoiding sex during an outbreak would be fine.
Good luck, whatever you decide. If you ever have questions about symptoms, transmission, or anything, we're here.
__________
Oh, podría atribuirse fácilmente a tu pareja actual. También podría atribuirse a una pareja anterior; es posible que nunca lo sepa.
Al final, no significa que hicieron trampa. No significa que alguien haya hecho algo malo, aparte de que probablemente no lo sabían.
Los médicos a menudo no saben estas cosas. De todas las cosas con las que tienen que mantenerse al día, el herpes cae hasta el fondo porque es muy común y piensan que nunca cambia.
Si terminas volviendo con tu pareja actual, aunque él no te lo haya dado, no tendrá ningún impacto en tu relación. Es muy poco probable que lo transmita cuando no tienes sintomas, por lo que simplemente evitar las relaciones sexuales durante un brote estaría bien.
Suerte, decidas lo que decidas. Si alguna vez tiene preguntas sobre los síntomas, la transmisión o cualquier otra cosa, aquí estamos.
In the end, it doesn't mean they cheated. It doesn't mean someone did anything wrong, other than they probably just didn't know.
Doctors often don't know this stuff. Of all of the things they have to keep up with, herpes falls way to the bottom because it's so common, and they think it never changes.
If you end up going back with your current partner, even if he didn't give it to you, it won't have any impact on your relationship. You'd be really unlikely to transmit it outside of symptoms, so just avoiding sex during an outbreak would be fine.
Good luck, whatever you decide. If you ever have questions about symptoms, transmission, or anything, we're here.
__________
Oh, podría atribuirse fácilmente a tu pareja actual. También podría atribuirse a una pareja anterior; es posible que nunca lo sepa.
Al final, no significa que hicieron trampa. No significa que alguien haya hecho algo malo, aparte de que probablemente no lo sabían.
Los médicos a menudo no saben estas cosas. De todas las cosas con las que tienen que mantenerse al día, el herpes cae hasta el fondo porque es muy común y piensan que nunca cambia.
Si terminas volviendo con tu pareja actual, aunque él no te lo haya dado, no tendrá ningún impacto en tu relación. Es muy poco probable que lo transmita cuando no tienes sintomas, por lo que simplemente evitar las relaciones sexuales durante un brote estaría bien.
Suerte, decidas lo que decidas. Si alguna vez tiene preguntas sobre los síntomas, la transmisión o cualquier otra cosa, aquí estamos.
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You are reading content posted in the Herpes Community
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
