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Sexual Dysfunction
hello community, ( help grace)
Here's what going on. I am 39yr old , female. In a relationship for all most 5 years now. In the beginning of our relationship, I had told him I was infected, He was supportive and still is. He has herpes too(from me). He said he didn't care, and wasn't concern about using a condom. I was hesitate. But in time, gave in. we do not use protection. So for a long time now, I feel I opened a can of worms and cant resolve 1 of our sex life problem, which involves the herpes. The herpes bothers me still to this day. I feel dirty and ashamed. (my perception). anyways, after about 6 months or so of not using a condom, sexual intercourse has become painful. Its painful on the outside, right at the opening. Its always the same spot. When it hurts I try to tolerate it so I can please him. But he is a horn dog and pushy. Then it came to a point, I started reducing sexual activity. I would tell him I'm having an outbreak and didn't want to fool around. he would say it doesn't matter cause he has herpes too. This went on for a lonnng time. I would explain my concerns and he would blow me off. We have many arguments about this and I am at my end, enough to end this relationship. he thinks I'm making this stuff up. so now I found this website. I have a few questions to ask to clarify my concerns.
1) If i am having an outbreak, so assuming a could have lesion inside of me or blisters, if the penis breaks it open, it spreads and can it make the herpes worst?
2) If he is having a outbreak, which i assume the virus is active in his cum. anywhere that cum touches, I could have future outbreaks there correct? ( I have stops on my hand that inflame and itch. it always the same spot.)
3). Does your period bring on herpes? I have a outbreak every month right before my period.
4) It is possible to be active for a long period of time?
5) Does a autoimmune disease make herpes difficult to control?
6) What can I do to get my gyne to prescribe valtrex on a daily treatment?
7) When you have a outbreak does this throw off the yeast balance?
8) Does stress and sickness bring on herpes?
9) When a outbreak occurs, is it always blisters? Can it be a spot that's inflamed and itches so bad?
10) I never had blood work, I was swabbed. should I get Blood work to know my levels? what does the levels mean?
I have herpes 1 and 2, I've been tested for all other STD's. all negative.
Thanks Christine
Here's what going on. I am 39yr old , female. In a relationship for all most 5 years now. In the beginning of our relationship, I had told him I was infected, He was supportive and still is. He has herpes too(from me). He said he didn't care, and wasn't concern about using a condom. I was hesitate. But in time, gave in. we do not use protection. So for a long time now, I feel I opened a can of worms and cant resolve 1 of our sex life problem, which involves the herpes. The herpes bothers me still to this day. I feel dirty and ashamed. (my perception). anyways, after about 6 months or so of not using a condom, sexual intercourse has become painful. Its painful on the outside, right at the opening. Its always the same spot. When it hurts I try to tolerate it so I can please him. But he is a horn dog and pushy. Then it came to a point, I started reducing sexual activity. I would tell him I'm having an outbreak and didn't want to fool around. he would say it doesn't matter cause he has herpes too. This went on for a lonnng time. I would explain my concerns and he would blow me off. We have many arguments about this and I am at my end, enough to end this relationship. he thinks I'm making this stuff up. so now I found this website. I have a few questions to ask to clarify my concerns.
1) If i am having an outbreak, so assuming a could have lesion inside of me or blisters, if the penis breaks it open, it spreads and can it make the herpes worst?
2) If he is having a outbreak, which i assume the virus is active in his cum. anywhere that cum touches, I could have future outbreaks there correct? ( I have stops on my hand that inflame and itch. it always the same spot.)
3). Does your period bring on herpes? I have a outbreak every month right before my period.
4) It is possible to be active for a long period of time?
5) Does a autoimmune disease make herpes difficult to control?
6) What can I do to get my gyne to prescribe valtrex on a daily treatment?
7) When you have a outbreak does this throw off the yeast balance?
8) Does stress and sickness bring on herpes?
9) When a outbreak occurs, is it always blisters? Can it be a spot that's inflamed and itches so bad?
10) I never had blood work, I was swabbed. should I get Blood work to know my levels? what does the levels mean?
I have herpes 1 and 2, I've been tested for all other STD's. all negative.
Thanks Christine
Best Answer
many things can cause pain like this. return to the gyn again for further evaluation or pick a new one. if you can find someone who specializes in vulvodynia, even better ( fancy name for pain in the genital area ).
grace
In April when I went to the gyne, i tried to explain and show her where it hurts me. She said she didn't see anything. I could touch it and it burns.It is there and it hurts every time during intercourse. I have to use lube and this helps but it's not enough. What else could it be? any thoughts?
christine
In April when I went to the gyne, i tried to explain and show her where it hurts me. She said she didn't see anything. I could touch it and it burns.It is there and it hurts every time during intercourse. I have to use lube and this helps but it's not enough. What else could it be? any thoughts?
christine
if you have pain in the same area every time you have sex, that isn't a herpes issue. have you followed up on this with your gyn?
no, you won't make your herpes worse. you already have the herpes virus below the waist. if you get ob's in new locations ( which over time, many people do ), it isn't because you spread the virus to new locations, it's just the way the virus acts.
if you are having ob's monthly, you should be on daily suppressive therapy. if your gyn won't prescribe it for your comfort, then it's time to find a new gyn who is up to date herpes on herpes and treatments and is more compassionate!!
if you had a lesion culture that was hsv2+, no reason for any blood testing.
grace
no, you won't make your herpes worse. you already have the herpes virus below the waist. if you get ob's in new locations ( which over time, many people do ), it isn't because you spread the virus to new locations, it's just the way the virus acts.
if you are having ob's monthly, you should be on daily suppressive therapy. if your gyn won't prescribe it for your comfort, then it's time to find a new gyn who is up to date herpes on herpes and treatments and is more compassionate!!
if you had a lesion culture that was hsv2+, no reason for any blood testing.
grace
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You are reading content posted in the Herpes Community
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
