I agree with grace, suppressive therapy with daily antiviral medication is the only way to keep virus level low. That combined with protective sex should diminish the risk for your husband. Also, you might try eating a low arginine diet such as avoiding nuts, peas, chocolate etc. and taking a lysine supplement. This has significantly cut down my symptoms and recurrences. I used to have them more than 6 + year, now only 1-2 year and they are more mild. I used to eat a lot of nuts and chocolate and had no idea it was triggering outbreaks.
I think the biggest thing is to be honest with your partner, take measures and precautions to protect them and then make the decisions together. It sounds like your husband is willing and you are lucky to have an understanding partner. Sex and physical intimacy are big parts of a loving relationships and I would hate to see you let your diagnosis stop you from living and loving!! Good Luck!!
have you tried daily suppressivetherapy?
grace