Dr. HHH or other Dr. Please help

[Srt208]

Dr help please
I have had HSV 1 for several years. After my initial out break I did not have another for several years. Since November I have had 3 outbreaks. One in my nostrils.
Yesterday my partner and I engaged in intercourse and we had some oral play. Several hours later I noticed a sore spot in the crease of my mouth. I did not have any tingling or burning sensation prior to this, nor any pain during the beginning of my day when we had intercourse.
Upon inspecting the site, there was no visible redness not blisters or bumps. But, I started obsessing over it, knowing I had just preformed oral sex on him and he on I earlier that day. By the end of the evening it was more tender and red but I figured maybe because I irritated it.
This morning I inspected the site first thing. It looked like possibly an infected folicle but when I pushed on the site a clear liquid discharged. Now, there still were not multiple visible blisters, no itching or tingling but it sent me in a tail spin.

He has never contracted HSV and has never had a sore ever.
My question is this: what is the likelihood that I could have given him the genital form of HSV 1 when I had no leasion sore at the time of oral intercourse?
After sex we showered and as I always do had him was the genital area right after we had sex because I was told that greatly reduces a chance of transmission as is.
He is having a melt down as am I because neither of us has ever had an std and I am so extremely careful with this always. I contacted my physician and they said its a waiting game and offered no other advice.
Someone please help.

[HowardH]

Almost certainly neither your nor your partner has a new HSV. "Melt down" is an unwarranted overreaction!

Having had genital HSV1 for years, you are immune to a new HSV1 infection, anywhere on your body. For that reason, auto-inoculation (self transfer of the virus to a new location) can occur during initial herpes but is very rare in people with longstanding herpes. And dven if you had transmitted HSV1 to your partner, you can't re-catch it from him. So you can be sure the spot at the crease of your mouth isn't HSV1 a new HSV infection. And I also doubt it's an old one. Conceivably you have had oral as well as genital herpes all these years, and happened to have your first recognized cold sore. But it's unlikely.

So I doubt you exposed your partner and sort of agree with your doctor, i.e. it's a "waiting game" to see if your partner develops symptoms of herpes. But I see no reason to expect it. Another option is for him to have a blood test. Nearly half of all adults in the US have positive blood tests for HSV1, even amont those with no history of cold sores etc. So there's a 50:50 chance he already has it. If so, then he also is immune to a new infection, even if you and he have sex when you are contagious.

I hops this has helped. Best wishes.

[Life360_Dave]

The only for sure information about oral hsv1 to genital from oral sex is that is on the rise. Its a fairly new realizations and people may be most infectious a few hours before a sore appears. If this was a herpes outbreak the risk would be much higher than 1 or 2% but from how your describing the irritations and location it would not really appear as herpes. Youve had them before and most often they are the same as prior outbreaks.
Theres a person at work here and the sore is always in the same spot and always looks the same. Im not saying to to confirm in fact you were not having an outbreak but just trying to put things in some perspective.

He can test at the 8 week mark as a good indicator but at this point dont be having a melt down over this.

[asymptomatichsv]

Has he ever tested for hsv in the past?   Have you had your hsv typed?  The best thing to do is get blood drawn in the absence of blisters to see if either of you have been exposed.