scared and sorry

[jakesplum]

What is the likelihood of a man contracting genital herpes from a woman after having sex only once?? The woman was at the end of an outbreak after not having an out break for many many years..

[gracefromHHP]

You had an active lesion present so the odds are a little higher than usual for this situation to be honest. Have you talked to him about your herpes so that he can pursue testing to see what his status is now and then repeat his tests in a few months?

Odds are that 20 years ago you were never tested properly for herpes and just told you had hsv2. At this point , if you haven't already, it's well worth it to get a type specific herpes igg blood test to see if you have hsv1 or hsv2.  If you do have hsv2, shedding and odds of transmission have no correlation at all to the number of recurrences you have so you should be taking more precautions with partners. The herpes handbook at www.westoverheights.com is a terrific and free resource if you haven't read it already. Unless you've had more teaching over the years, odds are you really weren't given much info at all about herpes 20 years ago.  

grace

[jakesplum]

The passion was so overwhelming that we had unprotected sex and it was our first time together. We are both very mature older adults .I have not told him and I am praying he doesn't contract it. I have had no outbreaks in 20 years and have never passed it to any of my partners. Even when it was in the very active stage at the beginning I never used protection and no body has ever come back and said I gave it to them.But this time I think I was having an outbreak and didn't realize it until after the fact. I went to my Dr.and he confirmed it by culture. I am so stressed about this. He is married. I am just so scared. I have been waiting for a "bomb" to drop!!
How likely is it after only this once????

[Verysaddude]

protected or unprotected....I know the studies say its possible but the odds are very low.