Earlier in treatment I would have Herxing that would not stop until I had both stopped medication and had allowed time (a couple of weeks) for it to clear out. I pretty much spent most of '09 feeling awful much of the time from Herxing or recovering from it!
Keep in touch with your LLMD about if/when to back down on treatment. I'm not medically trained, but it has been my experience that I had to endure some of the nasty Herxing to get past the worst of my illness. However, there is only so much one can take, and as you note this process is both physically and mentally exhausting. I learned my limits as I went along, and at times did need to stop/pause treatment and/or reduce doses.
And for your panic attacks, kava worked best for me until I had a CNS ADR from a drug and got hooked on benzos. Benzodiazepines initially work great for full blown panic, and is probably the most potent psychiatric drug for panic symptoms.
Something like Corydalis may work good for anxiety/panic and insomnia, but I haven't tried it yet. You can't get it from a health food store as far as I know.
And about your vision.... My visual contrast is not good during a big die off. I can walk from outside to inside and see nothing.
I am not sure if this is what your talking about. It sounds like you may be experiencing a little depersonalization/derealization type symptoms as well.
These are all legitimate concerns -- I'd suggest you call your MD in the morning, or even this evening if you think things are going south. If you can't reach him or his service, then the ER may be something you would want to do. No one on this site is medically trained that I know of, so you can't rely on us for advice at that level -- sorry!
You don't mention rife, but I seem to recall that you have been using it. I've been doing some reading on rife, and it sounds like the herxing can be substantial. You may be hitting it kind of hard and perhaps need to dial it back a bit, but that's where you need to talk to your MD.
I have read recently that Spring and Fall can cause an increase in symptoms, and I have experienced that recently -- either that or a coincidence. I had a quiet winter, then >boom<.
Also you might ask your LLMD if you should see an ophthalmologist for an eye exam. There are things an ophthalmologist can see that an MD without special equipment can't, as I understand it. I too have vision issues from time to time, and it can be alarming.
Don't be a hero -- call the MD if you have any doubt. Let us know what he says and how you do, okay?
It sounds like you have Bartonella. The anxiety and panic attacks can be nasty. I've been in the ER when I wasn't listening to my body on pharmaceuticals with attacks where my heart rate was about 200 bpm.
Lyme usually starts to flare around the a few days before the full moon for me. Bart flares about every 5-7 days, but in my case, it feels constant.
I haven't tried the Pekana drainage kit (heard it's good). I find that I grab for the activated charcoal most of the time. Sometimes I can't do anything but wait (and yes, the waiting can be several weeks till things calm a little).
Perhaps you have the real intracellular bart, and herbs are attacking your bart as well. For whatever reason, it doesn't require as much herbs/drugs (compared to most people who post) for me to feel a bart die off. I just haven't completely made it through one since it was too emotionally and physically scary for me.
Next time you have labwork done, if your bilirubin is elevated (not necessarily above normal), and your RDW (red blood cell size) is small and out of range or barely in range, whatever you are taking is probably constant killing intracellular pathogens (pathogens inside your red blood cells). This and the toxins from gram negative bacteria is probably what makes me have the constant herxing feeling, but we are all different. My liver/spleen has to constantly dump old red blood cells, and create new, healthy ones. My constant herx is getting better after a couple months of a natural protocol. I've stopped it for a bit when things were getting out of control, and I do feel better when I am not taking antimicrobials.