I am afraid I have cancer

[RedFlame]

I don't know if some of you know about some major problems with my mouth.  It began with a large lesion in August that has never healed and now I have additional ones.  Then my Parotid gland swelled in September and has never fully resolved.  

I saw a dental oral maxillary surgeon last week.  I was referred there initially for possibility of Behcet's.  

He found swollen lymph glands, many lesions (not Behcet's type), possible hyperplasia, lack of saliva, allot of petichiae and redness.  He used these words while talking to residents though not me.

When I asked him he said I had 'chronic ulcers'.  He scheduled me for a biopsy in 10 days after taking an anti fungal medication.  If there is any Candida in there that can mess up the results.

I'm really scared.  I'm afraid I will have cancer, I know it's stupid to say---but I'm scared.  I don't know what I will do if it is cancer.  If I am told that I have it my legs will buckle.  The biopsy is next week on the 14th.  


What do you guys think?  Am I just being over-reacting?  Maybe he was just saying those words to teach them and it didn't have much meaning?  He told me just chronic ulcers.  

I think I am panicked a bit.

Red

[michelleric]

HI Red,

Wishing you strength and good thoughts...
Michelle

[lovemy6monkeys]

Red,

I'm thinking of you! Lots of ((hugs))
~Jess

[jensequitur]

The waiiiiiting... is the hardest part, as Tom Petty would say.  Hang in there chica!

[RedFlame]

thanks to everyone.  I saw my PCP today, she confirmed that they are suspicious of cancer which of course is what I heard him say.  I guess I keep asking people because I want a different answer or something.  She also said, they weren't sure that I had it.

So, the biopsy next Monday---than wait.

I know you guys will pull me through and yeah, I'm very feisty

Red

[sllowe]

Hi Red!

I'd will your fear away if I could! But, know I can't :(  

Just reminding you that someone came on here in May of 10 and her user last is Flame, and 1st is Red! We'll help you burn through this (no matter what it is) too! With a name like that - I know your one tough cookie!

Until you can, we'll pull you through - totally understandable to be scared especially w/smoking. I think like that alot too and blame all my probs on it -

thinking of you!
-shell

[Saadbell]

You are in my thoughts, and sending positive vibes.  Just don't go to medical sites and start reading you will only scare yourself silly.  Just know you are never alone, we are all pulling for you and that they will find that it is not cancer.

[twist330]

Thinking of you, I always think the wait, however short, and weather it is for a test and or results is unbearable.
Big hugs
twist

While typing this I'am pretty sure I have spelt "weather" incorrectly in this context, I have a little thing on my computer you click right and it's meant to give you correct spellings and meanings. Well it was no help, but it did stop me from typing "wether" which apperently means a castrated male!

[Sparkysarah]

Dearest Red

What can I say that has not already been voiced. I am so sorry to hear that you are giong through this and can understand how worried you must feel..it is a natural reaction that will only be put to bed when the results are confirmed. I shall keep you in my thoughts and prayers and until your appointment I pray that you can find a way to help your anxiety.

with fondest love and big hugs

Sarah x

[shermay]

Hi Red,

Take a deep breath, and TRY not to think too hard, and please don't start googling around.

We are here for you, and that's all you need to know without doing your own research!

Just reach out anytime.

I had a scare myself a few years ago, when I had a large mole on my shoulder removed.  I had the biopsy and I was in the clear - but yes I too was scared.

The 14th is not too long a wait, how soon will you have the results?

You'll be in my thoughts,

Hugs,

Debs x

[supermum_ms]

Hey Red,

I'm not surprised your thoughts have run as they have, any test done to check for the big C is scary, seriously anyone would do the same in your shoes. Try and keep in your thoughts that more tests turn out negative than positive, small comfort but one to maybe hang on too for a while.

Your in my thoughts!

HUGS..............JJ

[RedFlame]

jen, paula, bob and doublevision:  

thank you so much for keeping me in your thoughts.  Having so much support makes it easier and soothes my mind.  And, I will keep all of you in my mind.

It may come back negative and that will be a good thing.

Red

[COBOB]

Red,

I started that thread about scary MonSters, but there are other monsters besides the MS ones.  We all get scared, but we don't always talk about it.  Maybe we should more often.

Your in my thoughts,

Bob

[drsdonthelp]

Red,

You are in my thoughts and prayers that everything will be ok. My mom just had a breast cancer scare and is going to have a biopsy on Friday. Her Docs. had her so worried until she saw her ( breast doc. ) LOL  I don't remeber what they are called right now, He said he's 80 % sure its not cancer. Phew!!!

I know its easier said then done, but rest your beautiful mind and things will turn out ok. :)

Please know that we are all here for you,
Hugs,
Pam

[doublevision1]

It isnt stupid for you to voice that fear.  I bet 90% of us in this forum would allow our own minds to go exactly where your mind went.  Very hard not to worry until the tests are done, but try to reassure yourself by remembering that there are many other less serious, less scary things that this could be.  Biopisies come back negative all the time; it is great that you have a doctor that is being thorough.  It is hard not to think of much else until you know, but I find the best way to bide time like this is with distraction, maybe hang out with a friend you havent seen in a while, someone who makes you laugh.  Take care, keep us posted and dont forget to breathe.  Will be thinking of you.

[figuerpa]

Red,

I will be thinking of you through this process. Let's all hope that you are just over analyzing what you heard and that it will all be ok.

No one wants to hear they have cancer so I can only imagine how you are feeling thinking that you may.

You are always in my thoughts and prayers but you will be more so now.

Take Care and BIG HUGS for you
Paula

[jensequitur]

Scary...  Thinking of you honey.  Stay busy and try to keep calm.

[RedFlame]

thanks Alex and Kelly.  It probably will come back negative the odds are in my favor.  I think I have worried about that too because I smoked for 30 plus years and the 'ulcers' are on the sides of the tongue where I inhaled.

The thought of that kind of cancer is horrible.

I don't know how long it will take to get the results after it's done.  I wouldn't think it would take long.  I am going to just keep myself busy
Red

[anon07072023]

I'll be thinking of you, especially right now.

I could see how you could come to that conclusion - that it may be cancer. At least it sounds like you're in good hands and they are listening to you. I will definitely be hoping that it is NOT cancer.  Maybe they're just taking extra precautions, just in case.  You don't need any more stress in your life than you already have right now.  

I understand that it's going to be a long 10 days for you. Will you know the results on that day or how long does it take for them to examine the biopsy?

Try to keep yourself extra occupied so maybe you'll think about it less.  
-Kelly

  

[HVAC]

I am sorry. The word Cancer scares anyone. They had thought I had oral cancer twice. I had the biopsies and it turned out to be nothing. They never really figured it out. I went through them thinking I had cancer of the gallbladder last year. I decided not to worry about it until they knew for sure and I did not have it. I now take the attitude not to worry until I know for sure. I think of how many medical tests I have had which come out negative. I sure hope you do not have Cancer. Hang in there.

Alex

[RedFlame]

I forgot.

For those who have asked:

my PCP referred me to a rheumatologist to investigate the possibility of Sjogrens which is still investigating.
during this it was discovered I have the gene for Behcet's, another autoimmune disease seen more in the middle east. it involves oral ulcers---hence the referral to look at the ulcers.

[RedFlame]

thanks everyone!  I have to take it one day at a time just like all of us do.  The doctor didn't say I had cancer, he just want's to make sure....That's when I asked him what I had.  

The lymphadenopathy didn't really surprise me, since my Parotid gland has never fully receded.  I think the lymph glands and the other words scared me.

I need to keep this out away from myself from now.  

It will probably come back fine and then I will slip back into this insane world that all of us are living in.

thank you for reminding me that you support me and are here for me

hugs
Red

[candy158]

Hi sweetie, I know we are all afraid of Cancer, one type or another.  I will pray that that is not what you will be diagnosed with.  

Try not to panic though, ( easier said than done, for sure), and put your faith in your doctors, and knowing that they will take care of you.

I can't imagine what you are going through, I went through similar feelings when I had my tumor removed last September, I thought I had cancer too, and was petrified, so I do understand your feelings.

I was also told " try not to panic", and I thought, " ya, right" , but it was good advice for me, and the extra worry will just make the other things worse.

So, I will be praying for you, and await your results.  No matter what the verdict is, you always have people here to lean on and that love and support you, so don't forget that.  OK???

gentle hugs to you,
Candy

[daisy.girl]

I am sorry you are afraid of this being cancer, I understand your fear. That fact that he told you chronic ulcers....may mean just that, but to be safe, he wants to biopsy just to be certain.
The words he used mean:
hyperplasia means overgrowth of tissue or increased cell production; or MAY be a precancerous changes.
petichiae just means small  (pin point size) broken blood vessels

I pray that your biopsy comes back clean....you are in my prayers

[Wobbly]

Oh my, I can imagine how you must be feeling.  Try not to panic I know it's easy said then done.  Is there any way you can call the Dentist and ask what he meant and ask what he think??  He probably won't say though!!  And I know when they are training they say all the option that it could be so maybe this is one of those times.

this is the time for you to be strong and know that we are here for you, your not alone honey.  My prayer are going out for you and breath..

take care friend and let us know how your doing... if you need to chat ... just chat..
wobbly