Aa
The next few weeks
I have mentioned that we will have to move out our house we have lived in for the last ten years. The next two weeks will be quite emotional, difficult to deal with. The bank will be taking ownership of our house and we have to vacate this place.
All the MS symptoms and the effects on my family will be painful for all of us these coming weeks. We have purposely left some of the moving tasks till after Christmas just to make the holiday a bit more enjoyable.
Our friends and family are for the most part being good to us. We will be moving in with two sets of friends with my youngest son living with close friends of his; my wife and I with some other fiends. My oldest son will be back at college.
Until an apartment of our choosing is available we will live in this separated manner. As soon as an apartment is arranged we will all rejoin as a single family unit.
All the MS symptoms and the effects on my family will be painful for all of us these coming weeks. We have purposely left some of the moving tasks till after Christmas just to make the holiday a bit more enjoyable.
Our friends and family are for the most part being good to us. We will be moving in with two sets of friends with my youngest son living with close friends of his; my wife and I with some other fiends. My oldest son will be back at college.
Until an apartment of our choosing is available we will live in this separated manner. As soon as an apartment is arranged we will all rejoin as a single family unit.
Things going to Salvation Army, some Book to Books by Chance, Some things on Craigs List, some in storage at a friends.
Our stuff is being divided as will we. As a family we will reunite when an apartment is available.
We decided to have an "empty house" party inviting all our friends and family when everything is gone, celebrating the dreams and memories we had in this place.
We will leave little cutout shadows of ourselves on the walls and floor for the mortgage company people to see when come to take over the house.
thoughts from my wife:
It is hard to do the work of leaving,
so we turn up the music.
We play Barioni, “Nessun Dorma,”
and Bjorling and Nicolai Gedda.
Earlier we went room to room,
picking through belongings, sorting.
I found a container of toy cars you loved as a boy,
a black Ferrarri and a black Murcielago.
You race them around the bedroom carpet, 7 again, not 18,
open all the doors to show how they work, open the hood.
I found a wooden rattle and a little purple felt mouse you stitched in school.
Georges Thill hits a high C and the note hangs in the air
touching every nerve in my shaking body.
Tenor voices
elevate our sorrow and we retreat to chairs .
Tired.
We talk about language. The safety of words about words.
If I could sing, I might break my own heart.
A friend said once, a person can live anywhere for a short time.
I'm living in the air where Georges Thill's voice soars,
over all this, over and through.
What will the new people hear?
Music leak out of the walls in the shadows of early morning.
Arias in the shower, a soft murmur from the basement vents.
Jusse singing “O Helga Natt” or the sound of ten years
compressed into one last climbing scale.
When we shut the door, it will be La Boheme I hear,
I'll hear Bizet, not a small voice saying “goodbye.”
Our stuff is being divided as will we. As a family we will reunite when an apartment is available.
We decided to have an "empty house" party inviting all our friends and family when everything is gone, celebrating the dreams and memories we had in this place.
We will leave little cutout shadows of ourselves on the walls and floor for the mortgage company people to see when come to take over the house.
thoughts from my wife:
It is hard to do the work of leaving,
so we turn up the music.
We play Barioni, “Nessun Dorma,”
and Bjorling and Nicolai Gedda.
Earlier we went room to room,
picking through belongings, sorting.
I found a container of toy cars you loved as a boy,
a black Ferrarri and a black Murcielago.
You race them around the bedroom carpet, 7 again, not 18,
open all the doors to show how they work, open the hood.
I found a wooden rattle and a little purple felt mouse you stitched in school.
Georges Thill hits a high C and the note hangs in the air
touching every nerve in my shaking body.
Tenor voices
elevate our sorrow and we retreat to chairs .
Tired.
We talk about language. The safety of words about words.
If I could sing, I might break my own heart.
A friend said once, a person can live anywhere for a short time.
I'm living in the air where Georges Thill's voice soars,
over all this, over and through.
What will the new people hear?
Music leak out of the walls in the shadows of early morning.
Arias in the shower, a soft murmur from the basement vents.
Jusse singing “O Helga Natt” or the sound of ten years
compressed into one last climbing scale.
When we shut the door, it will be La Boheme I hear,
I'll hear Bizet, not a small voice saying “goodbye.”
Another way to look at this...you are giving the opportunity for another to make merit by doing good deeds. The giver feels good about themselves. They are blessed to help another. You really wouldn't want to take that feeling away from them? I think most of us have been on both sides of the fence. When we hand money. food or other necessities to one in need, it makes us feel good to be of help. Surely, your friends feel the same way.
Please try to receive their gifts with joy. Remember that feeling you had giving to another. Don't take that feeling from them. Besides, from what you have told us about MCBCON, once he is on his feet, I see a twenty dollar bill being handed to another in need.
Again, McBCON, it is harder for men to accept but use that beautiful mind and consider how the giver feels.
Hugs for you,
Sumana
Please try to receive their gifts with joy. Remember that feeling you had giving to another. Don't take that feeling from them. Besides, from what you have told us about MCBCON, once he is on his feet, I see a twenty dollar bill being handed to another in need.
Again, McBCON, it is harder for men to accept but use that beautiful mind and consider how the giver feels.
Hugs for you,
Sumana
I am so happy to hear that people are helping you! I have heard that it is humbling to receive. Is that how it feels to you?
I cannot figure things out. Some people keep giving to us and are not asking anything in return.
How can we accept so much knowing these debts are actually real gifts being given to us so openly. In other words I know we will not be able to repay their kindness.
When I used to work in Detroit. It was so easy to find people in real need. There were/are so many people in need and living on the streets it was hard to figure out how to begin to help. Giving was easy though because we were blessed with talents and financial luck.
I got to know people living on the streets; I was able to figure out who really need help and who was mostly trying scam. When I figured out who was in need we found ways of supplementing their income. For a couple people we simply found them an apartment and paid their rent in order to get them off the street. We never worked through social organizations because of the politics and overhead in both time and money.
Now we are in need, but not in the dire need of having to live on the streets. But, my wife and I are much more impoverished than before and we are both chronically ill.
It is so strange to have to accept help from others instead of being the one giving the aid. I feel embarrassed having to accept help from these gracious people. Yet, all I can do is say thank you over and over.
Because of my work before the MS, I have earned enough hours and financial credits to receive enough money from disability, SSI and Medicare that we will be able to afford a decent apartment. In a couple weeks we will be out of this house. After a short while of living with friends we will be able to get an apartment.
How can we accept so much knowing these debts are actually real gifts being given to us so openly. In other words I know we will not be able to repay their kindness.
When I used to work in Detroit. It was so easy to find people in real need. There were/are so many people in need and living on the streets it was hard to figure out how to begin to help. Giving was easy though because we were blessed with talents and financial luck.
I got to know people living on the streets; I was able to figure out who really need help and who was mostly trying scam. When I figured out who was in need we found ways of supplementing their income. For a couple people we simply found them an apartment and paid their rent in order to get them off the street. We never worked through social organizations because of the politics and overhead in both time and money.
Now we are in need, but not in the dire need of having to live on the streets. But, my wife and I are much more impoverished than before and we are both chronically ill.
It is so strange to have to accept help from others instead of being the one giving the aid. I feel embarrassed having to accept help from these gracious people. Yet, all I can do is say thank you over and over.
Because of my work before the MS, I have earned enough hours and financial credits to receive enough money from disability, SSI and Medicare that we will be able to afford a decent apartment. In a couple weeks we will be out of this house. After a short while of living with friends we will be able to get an apartment.
This is so horrible, such a glimpse of the greedy and preying state of our country.
This is a devastating trauma to all of you! I am so sorry.
This happened to me in 2008. I/we were the first wave of people to lose our home through the Wall street greed we now call subprime lending.
I won't get into that now.
It's not that the things are little that you are getting upset about....it's about the excruciatingly painful life/dreams you have now been forced to leave behind. Those 'little' things are triggers. Allow yourselves to grieve this together. Take the things that can't be replaced and leave what you can't take....don't let anyone guilt you about this either.
We left so much behind.
When our time ran out, we loaded what we could in our cars. We sat outside sobbing and holding each other----I kept saying..."what a dream we had...what a time we had" over and over.
Let yourselves cry.
There will be people..friends...and family who may judge you. Tell them to shove it.
Please tell us how things are going if you can even throughout the day. Just a few words if you can
((((Hugs))))
Red
This is a devastating trauma to all of you! I am so sorry.
This happened to me in 2008. I/we were the first wave of people to lose our home through the Wall street greed we now call subprime lending.
I won't get into that now.
It's not that the things are little that you are getting upset about....it's about the excruciatingly painful life/dreams you have now been forced to leave behind. Those 'little' things are triggers. Allow yourselves to grieve this together. Take the things that can't be replaced and leave what you can't take....don't let anyone guilt you about this either.
We left so much behind.
When our time ran out, we loaded what we could in our cars. We sat outside sobbing and holding each other----I kept saying..."what a dream we had...what a time we had" over and over.
Let yourselves cry.
There will be people..friends...and family who may judge you. Tell them to shove it.
Please tell us how things are going if you can even throughout the day. Just a few words if you can
((((Hugs))))
Red
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