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HOCD and the past

I've been with HOCD for almost 3 months. It's terrible. I've been seeing a therapist, but he doesn't have experience with HOCD and sometimes freaks me out. However, I've been trying Exposure an Prevention Response treatment for my own with seeing some tips in Internet. I'm feeling kinda better. I accept the homo thoughts and agree with all these thought, also i told to myself that "I'm gay" and after all I still being attracted to girls. But, sometimes, some thoughts from the past appear. Like a time in the gym seeing a man a lot, just because I admire him, but in my head pops a thought that tell me that I liked him and I was attracted to him and these freaks me out. Anyway, there are appearing a lot of thoughts from the past that make me think I has being gay since ever, but I doesn't knew it. I've been always attracted to girls; and never had an sexual "fantasy" whit a male before the HOCD started in my mind, anyway, this "fantasies" are unpleasant and disgusting. What can I do with these thoughts? The HOCD distort the past? Some other tips for HOCD?
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Avatar universal
Hey

Yeah probably best to find a therapist who can work with your OCD
Can you see a Doctor? I found medication helped a lot.
It doesn't really make it go away, but it sort of calms you down so that you can start to help yourself. That's my experience anyway :D
send me a message if u wanna chat more about it!
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Avatar universal
Nope. I have't tried any meds. My therapist doesn't know much about OCD. And he can't help me. I am searching a new therapist with experience in OCD. It's very hard break HOCD. :C
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Avatar universal
Hey there

Sorry to hear about your hard 3 months. Did your therapist tell you about intrusive thoughts? I found when i understood OCD better I was able to manage it much more.
Intrusive thoughts are unwanted thoughts that everyone gets but the problem is folks with OCD just take them on board too much, while other people would dismiss them as nothing.
A book called 'Break Free from OCD' helped me to understand the OCD pattern so i could get working on breaking it.
Have u tried any medications?
Helpful - 0
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