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Pain meds and pregancy how dangerous?
Those of you that know me know that I have been through a rough patch lately. In the midst of this I have managed to gain 20lbs and all in my belly. I have an IUD so pregnancy is not likely but I am starting to wonder. I am more or less scared to dealth. If I were pregnant again it would be very dangerous because me pain is caused by Pelvic Congestion Syndrom. I have large vericous veins that pool with blood throughout the day and become huge and are extremely painful. My doctor (OB/GYN) told me after my last surgery that I could not have any more children, it would be far to dangerous. I went into a downward depression after hearing those words but pulled out of it. I got the IUD to make sure there was no room for mistakes as I get pregant when my husband winks at me. So, I have been in a lot more pain which I thought was stress related but pregnancy would also bring on more pain, I have gained weight in all the places I would, having leg and other cramps through the night, tired all the time, emotional, forgetful, pee all the time, headaches, etc. All of these could be symptoms of pregnancy for me but could also be just added stress from all I have been through lately. The weight gain I can not explain or the way it is all in my belly. I went from 100lbs to 125lbs so it shows on me!
I took three tests. Two of them nothing and then one this morning that I only looked at once and went back to bed. They were all negitive but when I went to throw the one away from this morning I saw a very very faint line. Now I am really scared. I should have never looked at it again. But........I am on round the clock pain meds, I have had one alchohlic drink, I have an IUD, I colored my hair, and I don't eat well or take vitamins and I drink caffiene all day to stay awake. If I am pregnant it would be really really bad for the baby. I am one of those women that never even drank a soda pop when I was pregnant. I was by the book with all three of my kids.
So question is has anyone been on pain meds during a pregnancy? If so was your baby ok? I am so worried. I hope for no reason.
I will be making an appointment with my OB/GYN for a blood test asap so they can take the IUD out just in case. I am currently taking Percacet, Tramadol, Valium, and Soma. Soma is the one that I think would be the most dangerous for a baby.
Any advice to help me not freak out. I am 98% sure I am not pregnant but if I am what will I do. It could be life threatening for me!
I took three tests. Two of them nothing and then one this morning that I only looked at once and went back to bed. They were all negitive but when I went to throw the one away from this morning I saw a very very faint line. Now I am really scared. I should have never looked at it again. But........I am on round the clock pain meds, I have had one alchohlic drink, I have an IUD, I colored my hair, and I don't eat well or take vitamins and I drink caffiene all day to stay awake. If I am pregnant it would be really really bad for the baby. I am one of those women that never even drank a soda pop when I was pregnant. I was by the book with all three of my kids.
So question is has anyone been on pain meds during a pregnancy? If so was your baby ok? I am so worried. I hope for no reason.
I will be making an appointment with my OB/GYN for a blood test asap so they can take the IUD out just in case. I am currently taking Percacet, Tramadol, Valium, and Soma. Soma is the one that I think would be the most dangerous for a baby.
Any advice to help me not freak out. I am 98% sure I am not pregnant but if I am what will I do. It could be life threatening for me!
Why don't we wait for the testing...In my opinion your not if two tests showed negative, but one never knows a 100% until confirmed by a doctor. You are stressing yourself out thus creating symptoms...
If your not prego, then try to find out why you are only gaining weight in the belly area. Maybe cushings.
If your not prego, then try to find out why you are only gaining weight in the belly area. Maybe cushings.
Well, first off if you are pregnant it will be okay. Try to take a deep breath. Secondly, from what I have read the Valium would be the most dangerous and if you are pregnant, you need to tell the doctor right away. Don't stop ANY meds CT as you could miscarry from withdrawls.
It would be the best idea to get a blood test from the doctor and go from there. I would not get the IUD out just in case, because you don't want to get pregnant if you are not pregnant. I am extremely fertile too. I had a miscariage in March of this year and became pregnant again a week later.
So to answer your questions. I am currently pregnant and have taken Soma and oxycodone during this pregnancy and also klonopin (there are other things but that's what was on your list and the klonopin is similar to valium.). The baby has been healthy and we have gotten good results on every test. I will be able to tell you in about 10 weeks if she is born with or without any dependence issues. My original plan was to taper off the meds at the end, but I'm just not sure if that's possible at this point. I have met other women online who have had babies while on meds and they were healthy and happy with no developmental delays, etc.
I was really freaked out when I first found out but I've done a good amount of research and talking to other moms in PM. I understand how scary it is. I never would have intentionally gotten pregnant and it's been difficult to find doctors and make sure I have the meds, etc, but I know it will be worth it.
Please try not to worry too much! :)
Some women
It would be the best idea to get a blood test from the doctor and go from there. I would not get the IUD out just in case, because you don't want to get pregnant if you are not pregnant. I am extremely fertile too. I had a miscariage in March of this year and became pregnant again a week later.
So to answer your questions. I am currently pregnant and have taken Soma and oxycodone during this pregnancy and also klonopin (there are other things but that's what was on your list and the klonopin is similar to valium.). The baby has been healthy and we have gotten good results on every test. I will be able to tell you in about 10 weeks if she is born with or without any dependence issues. My original plan was to taper off the meds at the end, but I'm just not sure if that's possible at this point. I have met other women online who have had babies while on meds and they were healthy and happy with no developmental delays, etc.
I was really freaked out when I first found out but I've done a good amount of research and talking to other moms in PM. I understand how scary it is. I never would have intentionally gotten pregnant and it's been difficult to find doctors and make sure I have the meds, etc, but I know it will be worth it.
Please try not to worry too much! :)
Some women
I forgot to add to watch list. This is a topic I have a great deal of interest in. Totie is right that you could be so stressed about the worry of being pregnant that you get the symptoms. We also gain weight in our belly when we are stressed as our cortisol levels rise and send fat to the tummy. Cortisol is also not good for the baby.
Try not to worry too much about everything you're doing or not doing that you should for a pregnancy. Women have been having babies for centuries and some women don't know they're pregnant for months and months. You are a good mom and one alcoholic drink in the very beginning wouldn't be awful. There are women who do terrible drugs and have awful habits who give birth to mercifully healthy babies.
Hang in there! Here's some info about pain meds and benzodiazepines that I found. I also have this posted in my journal along with some of my personal story and some comments from other moms-to-be. I have more info and support groups if you need them!
http://www.anesthesia-analgesia.org/content/85/5/1074.full.pdf
Try not to worry too much about everything you're doing or not doing that you should for a pregnancy. Women have been having babies for centuries and some women don't know they're pregnant for months and months. You are a good mom and one alcoholic drink in the very beginning wouldn't be awful. There are women who do terrible drugs and have awful habits who give birth to mercifully healthy babies.
Hang in there! Here's some info about pain meds and benzodiazepines that I found. I also have this posted in my journal along with some of my personal story and some comments from other moms-to-be. I have more info and support groups if you need them!
http://www.anesthesia-analgesia.org/content/85/5/1074.full.pdf
Oops, all of that was for the "add to watch list" and I went off on a tangent and forgot the watch list. I need to go to bed.
Hi Jen,
You are most likely stressing for nothing. Those tests are NOT accurate after they have "laid around" for awhile. It was accurate when you read it.
I too was told I could never carry another baby. There was no maybes. It would cost my life well before term. My husband loved me enough that he had a vasectomy immediately. He said he didn't need sperm to make him a man. In fact I think he proved he was more of a man. We didn't want to be placed in the position that we would have to make a choice...even though I couldn't have carried the fetus long enough for it to be viable it was a decision that we didn't want to face.
Women do get pregnant with IUDs in place. Nothing is foolproof. You may want to consider that in the future. Call your physician right away to ease your mind. But I honestly think you are okay as long as the test was negative when you first read it.
Best of Luck to You,
~Tuck
You are most likely stressing for nothing. Those tests are NOT accurate after they have "laid around" for awhile. It was accurate when you read it.
I too was told I could never carry another baby. There was no maybes. It would cost my life well before term. My husband loved me enough that he had a vasectomy immediately. He said he didn't need sperm to make him a man. In fact I think he proved he was more of a man. We didn't want to be placed in the position that we would have to make a choice...even though I couldn't have carried the fetus long enough for it to be viable it was a decision that we didn't want to face.
Women do get pregnant with IUDs in place. Nothing is foolproof. You may want to consider that in the future. Call your physician right away to ease your mind. But I honestly think you are okay as long as the test was negative when you first read it.
Best of Luck to You,
~Tuck
I agree that you probably have nothing to worry about. But if you ARE pregnant (unlikely IMO) ...your baby should be just fine. I had to take tylenol #3 through the beginning of my pregnancy with my 2-month old, lortab through the middle, and near the end I was having to take dilaudid and percocet...and my baby was born completely without withdrawals (and full-term at 39w4d) because the doctor and I were very careful to adjust my dose near the end. he's very healthy and bright so far :).
I also had to take pain meds while pregnant with my daughter because of kidney stones...we're talking high doses of morphine and dilaudid twice. I did stop taking them after 34wks and passed 3 stones without pain meds (don't recommend that, lol) and my daughter was born perfectly healthy and perfectly full-term (exactly 40wks) with absolutely no dependence issues...she's now a VERY bright and healthy 2 year old who can speak in 6-word sentences and is learning how to draw faces and write her ABC's.
So babies can be born completely fine if you are pregnant and have to take pain meds. remember, taking care of mommy is how you take care of baby when pregnant and too much pain is NOT good for a baby. But I still think that you most likely don't have anything to worry about...but the best thing to do would be to see your doctor ASAP to put your mind at ease :).
I also had to take pain meds while pregnant with my daughter because of kidney stones...we're talking high doses of morphine and dilaudid twice. I did stop taking them after 34wks and passed 3 stones without pain meds (don't recommend that, lol) and my daughter was born perfectly healthy and perfectly full-term (exactly 40wks) with absolutely no dependence issues...she's now a VERY bright and healthy 2 year old who can speak in 6-word sentences and is learning how to draw faces and write her ABC's.
So babies can be born completely fine if you are pregnant and have to take pain meds. remember, taking care of mommy is how you take care of baby when pregnant and too much pain is NOT good for a baby. But I still think that you most likely don't have anything to worry about...but the best thing to do would be to see your doctor ASAP to put your mind at ease :).
JadedSweetheart - Thank you so much for all the much needed information. I am in information junky. It is a well known personalitly flaw of mine. I have to know everything about everything that might have to do with what I am dealing with at the time. Anyhow, I really needed to hear that I would be ok taking pain meds if I am pregnant. I took them maybe 5 pills a week in the last part of my pregnancy with my third baby but never more than that. This pregnancy would be a whole new ball game for me if I am in dead pregnant.
I took a blood test today should have the results tomorrow. I have no idea how far along I would even be but I would guess not too far. I of course have all kinds of symptoms today because I am thinking about it. I have thought I was pregnant before so I'm sure all of this is for nothing. Although I still have to figure out why my belly is so big. I took milk of mag last night to clean out my system which it did indead. So that rules out that I am just backed up from my Celiac Disease. All of my "weight gain" is very low in my belly. Not like belly fat I would normally get. Stressed I have been for sure though so I am going to still hope it is just fat. I lost two grandmother's this month and another is in hospice so my stress is what I thought was causing all the extra pain.
I did stop taking my valium and tramadol. The thought of it messing with a baby was too much for me. I am having some withdrawl but not enough that I think it would hurt the baby (if there is one).
Now it is all just a waiting game.
I will let you all know when I do either way and what the next step is.
Oh and all the research I have done and from what my OB said a pregnancy would not be life threatening. It would increase my pain a lot both during and after pregnancy due to the PCS getting much worse with each baby. I already knew that so......... clock it ticking until I get the call.
Thank you all so so so much for being here for me during this waiting game. I hate waiting.......another personalitly flaw! Oh and my spelling of course ;)
I took a blood test today should have the results tomorrow. I have no idea how far along I would even be but I would guess not too far. I of course have all kinds of symptoms today because I am thinking about it. I have thought I was pregnant before so I'm sure all of this is for nothing. Although I still have to figure out why my belly is so big. I took milk of mag last night to clean out my system which it did indead. So that rules out that I am just backed up from my Celiac Disease. All of my "weight gain" is very low in my belly. Not like belly fat I would normally get. Stressed I have been for sure though so I am going to still hope it is just fat. I lost two grandmother's this month and another is in hospice so my stress is what I thought was causing all the extra pain.
I did stop taking my valium and tramadol. The thought of it messing with a baby was too much for me. I am having some withdrawl but not enough that I think it would hurt the baby (if there is one).
Now it is all just a waiting game.
I will let you all know when I do either way and what the next step is.
Oh and all the research I have done and from what my OB said a pregnancy would not be life threatening. It would increase my pain a lot both during and after pregnancy due to the PCS getting much worse with each baby. I already knew that so......... clock it ticking until I get the call.
Thank you all so so so much for being here for me during this waiting game. I hate waiting.......another personalitly flaw! Oh and my spelling of course ;)
I completely understand about being an information junkie. I have to limit myself to basic research because I tend to become a hypochondriac if I get into anything too much. I am also terribly impatient when it comes to test results. I am always the one to pick up the radiologists report before the doctor.
I'm happy to do the wait with you as I know how it feels. When I first found out I was pregnant (the first time just before this pregnancy) I had a major breakdown because I had no idea what to do about the meds. I found a site with a thread that a woman started after her pregnancy, CP and PM journey and I cried when she told me it would be okay. As moms there's just nothing worse than fearing for our children (or potential children).
Unfortunately, many in the medical profession are behind the ball when it comes to treating pregnancy and CP. It seems like every time I make headway in one area, I meet a brick wall in another. I hope you don't have a hard time with it all if you do turn up pregnant.
Ashelen- It's so encouraging to know your baby is healthy after having to take pain meds. I have heard some great success stories from other moms. If only more doctors understood that taking care of mom is taking care of baby. Sometimes I think I could walk in to an ER and pass out and they'd just stick a fetal monitor on my lifeless body and try to "explain" things they don't think I already know.
Sorry for being Debbie Downer. I'm just stressed out today.
I can't wait to hear your results! I'm always here to talk to if you need some distraction from the waiting!
I'm happy to do the wait with you as I know how it feels. When I first found out I was pregnant (the first time just before this pregnancy) I had a major breakdown because I had no idea what to do about the meds. I found a site with a thread that a woman started after her pregnancy, CP and PM journey and I cried when she told me it would be okay. As moms there's just nothing worse than fearing for our children (or potential children).
Unfortunately, many in the medical profession are behind the ball when it comes to treating pregnancy and CP. It seems like every time I make headway in one area, I meet a brick wall in another. I hope you don't have a hard time with it all if you do turn up pregnant.
Ashelen- It's so encouraging to know your baby is healthy after having to take pain meds. I have heard some great success stories from other moms. If only more doctors understood that taking care of mom is taking care of baby. Sometimes I think I could walk in to an ER and pass out and they'd just stick a fetal monitor on my lifeless body and try to "explain" things they don't think I already know.
Sorry for being Debbie Downer. I'm just stressed out today.
I can't wait to hear your results! I'm always here to talk to if you need some distraction from the waiting!
Don't stress out! Both of my babies are very healthy and happy and I can only gurantee that the 2-year-old is showing no delays but so far my 2-month-old is as bright and on-target as I could possibly dream as a mommy....I admit I was scared the whole time with both pregnancies, but there are hard choices we have to make and treating intense pain while pregnant is one of them.
I had a rough time with one midwife when I was pregnant with my daughter....but when I was pregnant with my son the partners' practice that I went to for OB were AMAZING. they were offering above and beyond the pain control that I felt I needed just to make sure that baby and I were both healthy and happy...and they ran all sorts of tests and ultrasounds to make sure that everything was perfect. I know what you mean about the ER; quick story. When I was pregnant with my son, I went in for a debhilitating migraine that had kept me from keeping food down for 2 days....they gave me a shot of morphine and some zofran and sent me home feeling better, but it came back about 4 hours later. So I returned (like they said) but it was a different doctor on staff...he gave me a nice long lecture about pain meds and pregnancy and said that I could take nothing but tylenol. refused to call my OB for a consult and refused to look at the records from FOUR HOURS PREVIOUS to see that I had in fact been given morphine....when my OB found out, he was horrified and called the hospital to tell them in no uncertain terms to treat me if I ever returned and that he would vouch for me if they ever needed it.
the key to treating pain during pregnancy is open communication with your doctor and honesty. Good luck with your test results, luv2bmomjen....I'm on pins and needles for you!
I had a rough time with one midwife when I was pregnant with my daughter....but when I was pregnant with my son the partners' practice that I went to for OB were AMAZING. they were offering above and beyond the pain control that I felt I needed just to make sure that baby and I were both healthy and happy...and they ran all sorts of tests and ultrasounds to make sure that everything was perfect. I know what you mean about the ER; quick story. When I was pregnant with my son, I went in for a debhilitating migraine that had kept me from keeping food down for 2 days....they gave me a shot of morphine and some zofran and sent me home feeling better, but it came back about 4 hours later. So I returned (like they said) but it was a different doctor on staff...he gave me a nice long lecture about pain meds and pregnancy and said that I could take nothing but tylenol. refused to call my OB for a consult and refused to look at the records from FOUR HOURS PREVIOUS to see that I had in fact been given morphine....when my OB found out, he was horrified and called the hospital to tell them in no uncertain terms to treat me if I ever returned and that he would vouch for me if they ever needed it.
the key to treating pain during pregnancy is open communication with your doctor and honesty. Good luck with your test results, luv2bmomjen....I'm on pins and needles for you!
I came across this actually while sitting here, after being awakened by pain, and trying to distract myself from it long enough for my pain medication to take effect (and hopefully get more sleep!). As you can probably tell by my pic, lol, I am also pregnant. I have also had to manage my pain with prescription medications during what is now my third pregnancy. I will concur with the other ladies and can verify that my children are happy and healthy! My son (9 yo) is even in the gifted program in school (and believe me, I was terrified while pregnant with him that something horrible would happen to him or he would be born with delays, etc). He is a wonderful, loving and smart boy! My daughter (almost 4 y/o) was also born with no issues or medication dependency and to this day shows no indication of being anything other than a healthy and happy little lady! I have had several ultrasounds during my pregnancy and all have come back showing that the baby is doing just great (praise God!) So, if you are pregnant, you are not alone in this. Your concerns show just what a loving and caring Mom you are, and what a great start that is for your (possible) baby. Wishing you the best of luck, whatever the result is!
I am trying to organize the house in order to make the hours pass. It is something I HATE with a passion (organizing) and waiting for that matter. I think today will be long. My stomach is a bit smaller today. I had lots of front and back cramping last night even through the max pain meds so I was sure I was either going to start my period or have a miscarriage. But nothing. It is hard for me because I have pelvic pain 24/7 so I can't tell if this is the Pelvic Congestion or possible stretching of my uterus or a mix of the two.
I woke up the last two days in withdrawl because I cut out my tramadol ER that I take at night two days ago. I couldn't stand it this morning so I took one 50mg pill instead of my 200mg ER. At least it was less medication.
So I know we have talked about meds being safe but at what ammount. I was moved a couple months ago to 8 10/325 percacet a day and one 30mg Roxicodone, also 4 soma and two valium and one tramadol. I stopped the tramadol and valium a couple days ago because they are a D drug during pregnancy. Is that actually a safe ammount during pregnancy or am I likely going to need to wean down if I am pregnant? I think I would anyway just because I would be so worried but I have NO idea if my pain doc will even treat me pregnant or my OB will keep me on this high of an ammount. What do you think.
I woke up the last two days in withdrawl because I cut out my tramadol ER that I take at night two days ago. I couldn't stand it this morning so I took one 50mg pill instead of my 200mg ER. At least it was less medication.
So I know we have talked about meds being safe but at what ammount. I was moved a couple months ago to 8 10/325 percacet a day and one 30mg Roxicodone, also 4 soma and two valium and one tramadol. I stopped the tramadol and valium a couple days ago because they are a D drug during pregnancy. Is that actually a safe ammount during pregnancy or am I likely going to need to wean down if I am pregnant? I think I would anyway just because I would be so worried but I have NO idea if my pain doc will even treat me pregnant or my OB will keep me on this high of an ammount. What do you think.
I have no idea about the amount, but I would caution you not to stop taking anything suddenly and I didn't even think of it until you mentioned the cramping. I have read that stopping any medication CT can cause a miscarriage so I think it's good that you took the tramadol today just in case. Hopefully if the doctor will not see you during pregnancy he would help you taper off. You also have the OB who sees you for the PCS who may be able to help and in my case I just called everyone to find a doctor who would see me. It's always better to have that in place before hand but when it's a surprise, there's not much we can do.
I have known other women here and elsewhere who tapered off the meds before pregnancy or as soon as they found out they were pregnant and did okay as well. I hope the time goes quickly for you!
I have known other women here and elsewhere who tapered off the meds before pregnancy or as soon as they found out they were pregnant and did okay as well. I hope the time goes quickly for you!
I am going crazy here. I called the OB office and my nurse doesn't get in until 1:30 so who knows when she will call. Then I called the lab and they refused to give me results because they can't varify they are talking to me with out a fax of my drivers license and I don't have a fax machine auughhhh!
I think most of it really is that I have not had my valium in three days. I am very very anxious. Wondering if I shouldn't just take one half of one to help me deal today. I'm so scared though so so scared. I hate the unknown.
I weaned before I had my third baby but after having him my pain is crazy bad and I can't see me ever being off meds all together. What I am on now is actually a wean down believe it or not and doesn't always cut the pain.
Until later..........
I think most of it really is that I have not had my valium in three days. I am very very anxious. Wondering if I shouldn't just take one half of one to help me deal today. I'm so scared though so so scared. I hate the unknown.
I weaned before I had my third baby but after having him my pain is crazy bad and I can't see me ever being off meds all together. What I am on now is actually a wean down believe it or not and doesn't always cut the pain.
Until later..........
Hey guys,
Doctor just called the lab forgot to run my test but she just got it in.
It is NEGITIVE!
I must say I don't feel all that relieved. Actually a little sad. Even though it isn't the way I would have wanted it to go and it is not the best thing for my body I would have SO enjoyed another baby.
I always have granchildren to look forward to I guess.
I will be going in for an ultrasound and then we will take whatever steps needed from there. There has to be a reason my belly is huge!
Thank you all for doing this wait with me {HUGS}
Doctor just called the lab forgot to run my test but she just got it in.
It is NEGITIVE!
I must say I don't feel all that relieved. Actually a little sad. Even though it isn't the way I would have wanted it to go and it is not the best thing for my body I would have SO enjoyed another baby.
I always have granchildren to look forward to I guess.
I will be going in for an ultrasound and then we will take whatever steps needed from there. There has to be a reason my belly is huge!
Thank you all for doing this wait with me {HUGS}
I'm sorry I didn't respond until now! I'm sorry about it being negative, since you were looking forward to maybe having another child. If it makes you feel any better I can tell you that this pregnancy with conditions and meds is nowhere near as enjoyable as my first two. I really loved being pregnant, to the point I wanted to be a surrogate. This pregnancy is just so much harder and so stressful with worrying about pain and meds all of the time.
I'm sure it's possible to have a good pregnancy while taking the meds, but I really wouldn't wish it on anyone from my personal experience.
I do know what you mean about being disappointed, though. When we miscarried right before this pregnancy I was devastated, even though I knew a pregnancy would have been hard, if I hadn't gotten pregnant again DH and I never would have decided to purposefully become pregnant so in that way it's been a blessing I didn't think I'd ever have.
I was happy to wait with you and I'm sorry you are disappointed. I hope you find the cause of the belly swelling and are feeling better now that you can take all your meds again. ((Hugs))
I'm sure it's possible to have a good pregnancy while taking the meds, but I really wouldn't wish it on anyone from my personal experience.
I do know what you mean about being disappointed, though. When we miscarried right before this pregnancy I was devastated, even though I knew a pregnancy would have been hard, if I hadn't gotten pregnant again DH and I never would have decided to purposefully become pregnant so in that way it's been a blessing I didn't think I'd ever have.
I was happy to wait with you and I'm sorry you are disappointed. I hope you find the cause of the belly swelling and are feeling better now that you can take all your meds again. ((Hugs))
Thank you again. I am feeling better. Just getting the house organized and eating healthy. Working out a lot. See if I can get some of this belly fat down so I can tell what is going on. I only weighed 100lbs a month ago and I just weighed myself and I am up to 125lbs. That is a lot of weight for someone my size. I will just watch it close and hopefully figure out what is going on. I know that a baby would not be practical now or ever for me. Just hard to face it again.
Wow, that IS quite a weight gain. 25% of your body weight. Definetly worth seeing the doctor about. Although you have been going through A LOT lately so it's possible it could be from stress. Do you think it could be fluid retention or swelling? I don't know much about PCS, but maybe it can cause fluid retention in the abdomen as it causes the veins to swell and all.
I applaud your eating right and exercising! I need to get some of that motivation! I'm sorry it's been hard for you. I wish it was something we could help you with!
I applaud your eating right and exercising! I need to get some of that motivation! I'm sorry it's been hard for you. I wish it was something we could help you with!
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