Your post is very difficult to read, and the topics are mixed together.
Does your current doctor know you are taking 3 oxycodone and 3 valium at the same time?
You are VERY LUCKY you have not overdosed.
You should NEVER take more of any prescribed medication than your doctor directs you to take. You should also not be taking more per dose or per day than prescribed.
As far as why the doctor won't prescribe norco over the oxycodone, perhaps it is because of the tylenol in the norco.
I am sorry you feel that way. I have been in pain management for more than 25 years, living with multiple chronic pain conditions, and have been through just about every aspect of pain management treatment out there.
In my opinion and experiences, any doctor who was giving you 10 doses of oxycodone per day was prescribing FAR TOO MUCH for you or any patient. Any patient requiring 10 doses of oxycodone per day is not receiving proper or even effective treatment, and the doctor is putting the patient at risk of addiction, respiratory suppression, and overdose.
I would have some idea of when doctors prescribe too much, since it happened to me long ago.
Pain management properly done, is about reducing pain to manageable levels, not eliminating all pain, which can not be done when dealing with chronic conditions.
If the oxycodone was not working for you at 4 doses per day, then another treatment option, different medication should have been tried, until a successful treatment protocol was found. One option should have been an extended release opiate, if an opiate was used, medications that specifically target headaches, botox injections, and many other options.
Opiates and benzodiazepines are notorious for causing rebound headaches, which is why they are seldom used to treat chronic headaches anymore and haven't been commonly used for years now.
There are other medications far more effective at treating, reducing and even largely eliminating chronic headaches than opiates/benzodiazepenes.
My comments are not intended to offend you, and my hope is that you will consider what I said.
Perhaps it is time to explore other treatment options to treat your headaches that may be far more successful in helping you manage them, and less likely to take you down a path to addiction and risk.
Unfortunately, in todays environment, and the recommendation guidelines issued regarding opiates, the restrictions in maximum daily dosing, and concerns about overprescribing, doctors and pharmacies are even more wary of prescribing higher doses of opiates, and especially when patients are saying that high doses aren't effective, they are only using them to avoid withdrawal. There are major concerns about prescribing poly pharmaceuticals- opiates/benzos, opiates/stimulants, etc to patients, even at low doses. Too many deaths have resulted from opiate/benzo combinations, and adding high doses of either or both, make an accidental overdose more likely.
Many patients have been cut back on their daily opiates, and/or been taken off either the benzo or opiate.
No doctor has to continue any patient on a medication regimen that another dr. had the patient on. Every doctor is supposed to examine, diagnose, and establish a treatment regimen they feel is best for that patient.
Likewise, going to the ER for non emergency pain flares usually results in referral back to your doctor, and perhaps a shot of toradol or similar anti inflammatory.
My suggestion is again, to find either an E,N,T specialist, oralmaxiofacial specialist, or dentist who treats TMJ, a consult with an orthopedic spine surgeon to see if surgery or other treatment option might be helpful.
Those appear to be your best options at this point.