6 year old cries

[pleaseadvise1975]

I got divorced a couple of years ago and we share custody of 2 daughters. My 6 year old concerns me. She is definitely a daddy's girl and this stops her getting close to my boyfriend who now lives with us. On the whole her fatther and I get along fine and have a joint parenting plan, but he tends to spoil her. She used to be so happy but now she gets moody, often the cause is if she does not get her way. She also calls herself stupid when she can not get things right first time. I admit I loose patience because she gives up but I am working on my patience but I can't seem to win. She often says I don't love her when I tell her off.. help. What is the best way to stop encourage her and to stop the crying without giving in and spoiling her. It is driving a wedge between my boyfriend and her because of how she acts and this makes it worse because I worry about this.. he is close to my youngest daughter because she does not act like this... Please advice

[margypops]

This kind of situation would affect a young child 's emotions, ask your Boyfriend to play games with both of the girls its possible he is Favouring the younger one , younger children are easier to please, maybe a good thing to "spoil " her I dont think that hurts its nice to let children do and have exciting things, her Dad obviously does ,This is a matter of better Parent/child Interaction.When she says "you dont love me' she doesnt mean it , she feels left out as she sees you probably being loving with someone other than her Dad ,Divorce is very hard on children and it is a good thing that you and her Dad share her and her sister they need both of you in their lives.Cut her some slack, 'spoil'her and get your friend involved aswell.

[jdtm]

Your daughter feels left out - and frankly, she is.  How else do you expert a six-year old to feel?  Maybe she would be better living full-time with Daddy - at least until you decide whether the "boyfriend" will be a family member or not.  Right now, he is a guest in your home (and to your daughter, an uninvited and unwelcome guest).  I think I would be upset, too.