Husband and porn

[adri1413]

Ok, so here's my situation. My husband has looked at porn before in the past and I don't agree with it. I feel like him looking at porn is in a way saying that I'm not good enough for him or satisfying him in that way. Like my body is not attractive to him so he has to look elsewhere. Anyway so I've explained to him how I feel about it and he apologized and said he understood. Today I found porn on his phone AGAIN. He said it's from the last time but that's a lie cuz the last time I deleted it in front of him. He is acting like he doesn't care and oh well. And the said thing is I just told him this morning how I feel distant from him and I didn't like how we weren't having sex and he said sorry and nothing's going on and he will make a
a better effort. But ugh it makes me so mad and I more upset he's lieing about it and shows no remorse for me. I'm 14 weeks pregnant. already gained about 8 lbs, have stretch marks galore showing from previous pregnancies, exhausted all day, working full time and taking care of kids now this is just icing on the cake. I feel like crying. Sorry so long, needed to vent. Thanks ladies!

[adri1413]

I didn't mean to turn this into a debate. Just wanted to vent. Thank you to the ladies who are understanding.

[tiaspilchuk4]

@skittles..A woman has every right to own her feelings and emotions just because porn doesnt effect or hurt you and your relationship doesnt mean it doesnt effect others.  I made the commintment to lust only for my husband the day i said my vows.  I excpect the same commitment from him.  The only difference between porn and real life woman is just a screen. No, he cant physically touch them but having the desire to look at them is just as hurtful.  

[jaloveslorelei]

It's really interesting that some woman define thier confidence and security as "being ok with my husband jerking off to other woman" I really hope you find a higher definition and source of confidence. All the girls I know that are so ok with these things, to the extent they brag and rag on women who arent, are the same girls whose husband's are out cheating. Its always with less attractive girls too. I dont get it. But I'm out grabbing a drink with some friends and your man is making out with some butter face across the bar, everyone except you knows it, but no one can tell you, bc you'll deny it or turn on those trying to help. Because your so cool and you trust your man... ha! You might think the whole self respect thing, the respect for women in which child abuse and daddy issues have driven to be apart of these films, and the expectations they have for man to meet are hillariouss... and that's really a shame Bc when your men are out screwing around, none of us think it's hillariousss. Wish the respect for other woman was a 2 way street here. To each thier own but don't know where any of you get off shaming other woman for having morals and standards. These women are generally products of incest, child sexual abuse, etc. Forgive us for not wanting to continue the cycle.

[Skittles_2_1_15]

That's boys who will see it like that as in non realistic sex just see and think sexual acts suppose to be like the movies he watch.. a Man wouldn't think like that because he know it's not realistic.. but you could be right for some...

[Chima7]

The problem with it is that if a guy starts watching it too often, then it sets these unrealistic perceptions of what sex is supposed to be like. And the more they seek it out, the more they need to get off. Over time, that translates to not being able to be satisfied be their real life partner which then leads to cheating on order to get that same kind of rush. It's a proven fact that this occurs often. There have been actual research studies about this. And the younger they were when they started watching it, the more messed up they are when it comes to truly understanding what real life sex is supposed to be like.

So, while I don't see it as cheating and I could care less about the way the girls look, my concern is with the long term effects of them seeing that and not having a realistic view of sex between normal people who aren't porn stars. That's the real problem with guys who watch porn.

[Skittles_2_1_15]

Yes it's something most of you ladies that posted should get over.. yea we all might feel a little insecure about our selves being pregnant duhh we pregnant and our bodies are going through changes.. now I see if you like uhh all he wanna do is watch porn an not touch me or have relations with me or what ever because he to busy pleasing himself and fantasizing over video vexins but that is not the case for any of the post I read tonight.. to me I just see jealousy because your man see another woman attractive come on we will always have another female that might have a sexier body than us that's just the way it is.. you don't have to agree with his video watching but I would rather him watch it with me or with out me but make sure he don't go out an cheat on me physically.. because then that's way different compared to just watching videos as I said in a prior post.. but every woman on here is entitled to there own opinion or expectations.. I just feel as I said before this is minor choose your battles because that's when the lying and sneaking will happen and for what.. just to please his lady when all he wanted was to Please himself mentally with a pointless video...