Aa
Is anyone pregnant and dealing w/heck of bad stress/death?
K, for those of you who know me, I'm 21, married 2 1/2 yrs, and i'm 12+ weeks pregnant, and recently my Stepdad OD'd on prescription drugs a couple days ago. He's been pronounced brain dead and my Mom is trying to decide on whether to pull the plug and donate organs or not.
The kicker is he just got custody of his daughter(Who he NEVER knew of until she was 12, 2 yrs. ago) in the last couple months here.
I feel so torn right now, I want to help my mom feel better, but don't wanna get too stressed. I'm also working a NEW full time job where I sit at a desk all day and work phones(Hilton reservations)
What have you all done in times of stress?
I confess... I had a glass of red wine, just 1. I'm past my 1st trimester so I felt safe, but I know I shouldn't do it. I don't plan on continuing it, so PLEASE ladies, NO JUDGMENTS, I really need advice and support in order to help support my mom and sis and bros'.
BTW... and uplifter, a friend from work (I met her 2 w. ago) got me my first baby gifts, a baby blanket and onsies!. lol, for both boy or girl.
The kicker is he just got custody of his daughter(Who he NEVER knew of until she was 12, 2 yrs. ago) in the last couple months here.
I feel so torn right now, I want to help my mom feel better, but don't wanna get too stressed. I'm also working a NEW full time job where I sit at a desk all day and work phones(Hilton reservations)
What have you all done in times of stress?
I confess... I had a glass of red wine, just 1. I'm past my 1st trimester so I felt safe, but I know I shouldn't do it. I don't plan on continuing it, so PLEASE ladies, NO JUDGMENTS, I really need advice and support in order to help support my mom and sis and bros'.
BTW... and uplifter, a friend from work (I met her 2 w. ago) got me my first baby gifts, a baby blanket and onsies!. lol, for both boy or girl.
Yes it is. and guess what??? HE FREAKIN MOVED TODAY! 7 times. The nurse tried to say he was posturing, BUT my mom has seen posturing before and thats not it.
She said at one point she was rubbing his stomach and a friend said "If you keep doing that I think he'll move" she did and moved her hand to his chest. She said he turned his head toward her!
heres to hoping!
She said at one point she was rubbing his stomach and a friend said "If you keep doing that I think he'll move" she did and moved her hand to his chest. She said he turned his head toward her!
heres to hoping!
Thank you. a bit of hope tho. Yesterday his heartbeat was normal, and BP too.
His temp started coming down, so SOMETHING in his brainstem has to be working if his temp is regulating. (thats what controls it.)
We're praying as hard as ever.
Cindie
His temp started coming down, so SOMETHING in his brainstem has to be working if his temp is regulating. (thats what controls it.)
We're praying as hard as ever.
Cindie
i'm praying for you and your family! i cannot even imagine how hard this is for all of you. i don't really have any advice, i just wanted you to know that i do care, and i wish the very best for you and yours.
thanks joy. I appreciate it. He hasn't responded at all, the last time my mom talked to him was at the house, and right when they got into the car. Then he stopped breathing.
So far he's still in a coma, braindead. all that. no change, no worsening. It's about as bad as it can get except he has a steady heart rythem @ 120 BPM or so.
At first I was fine, but the longer this goes on and I see my mom suffer, and my step sister silently suffer, it hurts me. And I get kinda mad like Why the F*** could he do this to them?
My brothers will be upset, but it'll be harder on my mom and sis. He was her REAL father, not just step. :(
So far he's still in a coma, braindead. all that. no change, no worsening. It's about as bad as it can get except he has a steady heart rythem @ 120 BPM or so.
At first I was fine, but the longer this goes on and I see my mom suffer, and my step sister silently suffer, it hurts me. And I get kinda mad like Why the F*** could he do this to them?
My brothers will be upset, but it'll be harder on my mom and sis. He was her REAL father, not just step. :(
So what is the update on your stepdad?
You have to do what you need for your baby right now. As much as you love your momma, you've got to worry about the little one.
My mom died when I was about 8-10 weeks pregnant with my first. I watched her take her last breaths and I was closer to my mom than any of my other siblings. When I got there she was reduced to winking or squeezing hands to respond to us. The last time she responded was by winking twice when my sister said, "Joy is here, Mom." She lasted 11 more hours but without any acknowledgment to us.
Anyway, the stress of the funeral arrangements, the visitation, etc. did not cause my baby any harm. But if you are worried that the stress is too much to bear, then don't cause yourself the undue stress! Just keep yourself distracted at work, with planning for the baby, get out and stay active. If you find your mind drifting, pop in a movie that really grabs your attention.
You're not heartless for trying to avoid the stress. Death is just a very depressing thing that can make even the strongest person very upset. HUGS!
You have to do what you need for your baby right now. As much as you love your momma, you've got to worry about the little one.
My mom died when I was about 8-10 weeks pregnant with my first. I watched her take her last breaths and I was closer to my mom than any of my other siblings. When I got there she was reduced to winking or squeezing hands to respond to us. The last time she responded was by winking twice when my sister said, "Joy is here, Mom." She lasted 11 more hours but without any acknowledgment to us.
Anyway, the stress of the funeral arrangements, the visitation, etc. did not cause my baby any harm. But if you are worried that the stress is too much to bear, then don't cause yourself the undue stress! Just keep yourself distracted at work, with planning for the baby, get out and stay active. If you find your mind drifting, pop in a movie that really grabs your attention.
You're not heartless for trying to avoid the stress. Death is just a very depressing thing that can make even the strongest person very upset. HUGS!
thank you, I appreciate it. I'm trying, but my mom will need major support, she's suffered from depression (not suicidal) for about a year... I'm wondering how badly this'll affect her. BUT I picked my bro's up from school and my step sis too, and was talking to them all and filling them in on what's going on w/my step dad and getting them prepared. I assured my stepsis it wasn't her fault just in case, and asked her if she felt that way, she said no. I assured her that he loves her Very much and loved having a daughter. I talked about him in present tense, just to keep the mood happy as possible.
Try just to focus on the good things like the baby gifts. I don't blame you for the glass of wine and you can find lots of research that says it's ok to have one once in a while. Take care of yourself and your baby first and then suppot your mom with what energy you left- if any
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