Devestated.. OT but an eye opener!

[K1990]

You always seem to think you've got it bad...  I found out yesterday that a friend from middle school and high school commited suicide on Monday night... she hung herself and her parents walked in and found her too late.  I don't get it... she was always popular, well loved, outgoing, smart, friendly, great person...  What could have been so bad to do that? It's just so heart breaking, I wish I could go to the funneral but it is tomorrow and way out of town...  I just can't stop thinking about it.  It makes me thankful for what I have and for knowing such a wonderful person!

[JoyRenee]

I also know someone who committed suicide. You never ever see it coming, even after it is too late to try to help them. You just wonder, "Why?!"

[martikadragoon]

I had a close friend who killed her self when we were 18, shortly after her birthday... the week prior to her memorial, her fiance hung himself. (she OD'd purposefully)

it was very tough.... However, I knew she was depressed and likely to do it considering she'd slit her wrist (DEEP) one time and had spiderweb scars all over her arms from cutting.

[Limonada]

That is awful.  My brother tried to kill himself a couple of weeks ago (no joke).  Just do what you can to be there for her family, if you feel you can.  Thankfully, my brother wasn't successful (and I pray he'll get the help he needs so he'll never try again) so I can only imagine how her family must feel.....but I'm sure they'll appreciate any and all support that they receive now.

[TARA1178]

Well, when it comes to extreme situations like this, I definately have some experience.  I am by far no professional, but I may be able to help a little bit, or at least put your mind at ease somewhat.  When someone gets to the point of contimplating suicide, it doesn't necessarily mean that thier social status, or what people see from the outside looking in is what is really going on.  Just because someone is high up on the social totem pole, doesn't meant that inside he or she is not batteling thier own demons.  9 times out of 10, even the people closest to that person don't know that they are suffering from some sort of issue.  As a matter of fact, the biggest signs to look for when someone is contimplating suicide, or planning on going forth with some sort of plan, is that they start giving away their most prized posessions, sometimes they start withdrawing from their normal routines such as calling in sick from work, staying in their rooms alot and things of that nature.  Not returning phonecalls, and such.  And then there's also a huge percentage of people who you don't even know they are having these thoughts, which makes it even worse when the time comes around that something devistating happens.  I myself have been in this situation.  I tried to overdose on a medication a couple of years ago, and no one in my family or that was close to me even knew that I was feeling depressed or was thinking about something like that.  I was not in any devistating situation, I had my 4 beautiful children, a loving husband, and my family.  The thing is, when you get to this point, you don't want to let anyone you care about know how you are feeling, because either you are embarrassed about it, or you don't want to cause any burdons on anyone.  It most definately is not a healthy situation, but uncontrollable on anyone's part but that one person.  They have to be able to realize and accept the fact that there is definately aproblem that needs to be dealt with, may it be a chemical imbalance in the brain, certain stresses that cannot be dealt with anymore or anything like that, but the person is the one who has to seek help for themselves, not anyone else.  It's kind of like an addiction.  There is not one thing on this earth that's gong to help cure this person without that one person realizing there is a problem and genuinly wanting to get help.  Even if the family or those that were close with her noticed that there was a problem, and had an intervention set up, yes, there could have been a way to commit that person to a facility to stop the act of self harm, but it wouldn't take away the fact that eventually she would get out, and life will go on as she intends.  And even when you are commited (that's what happened to me) there are definately ways to get around pleasing the doctors and professionals you deal with for them to clear you and let you out when you want.  Basically, that's why I say it boils down to only she is the one who can help herself.  So, yes you can most definately grieve for the family and the situation, but rest assured knowing that is was nothing that anyone could have done to change waht happened, or her status, or her life.  I am deeply sorry for your loss, and know she is in a better place now.  I will keep you in my prayers.  I hope I have helped even just a little bit.

Tara