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1755520 tn?1330569826

Thoughts about getting your tubes tied!!

I am 29 years old and this will be my fifth baby...i am blessed to be able to add on to my family, i have four healty babies and wanted another one. I am 27 weeks pregnant and i have to decide on a birth control method. I am not good with the pill cause i always forget, I have had the Mirena and it worked good up until my second year of having it and it intertwined in my uterus and i had to take it out I am skeptical about getting my tubes tied because of all the problems i have heard woman go through. I have a three day period, with no cramps have been that way since i started my period i dont want to go from that to cramps and seven days of a mentrual cycle...I need advice!!
Best Answer
1035252 tn?1427227833
Personally I believe that if you are in a committed marriage, your husband should get a vasectomy. And it has nothing to do with feminism or personal preference, lol. The reason I say this is because for a woman, getting her tubes tied is a (minor) abdominal surgery with a few days - week recovery time, and can cause complications. For a man, a vasectomy is an out-patient procedure that requires an hour and only a day of home rest with the biggest complication being swelling.

Sounds like an easy choice, in my book. Vasectomies are also MUCH cheaper to reverse if you change your mind later.

So you could get your tubes tied, but I would recommend researching a vasectomy and seeing if your husband is up for it. We were talking about getting my tubes tied, but when my husband realized how much easier the surgery would be for him to get than for me, he immediately volunteered. We changed our mind later and decided to get the paragard IUD (copper, not hormonal like Mirena) after our 3rd baby is born in April so if we decide to have one more baby when our careers are settled in 5-7 years, we'll still have that option without an expensive procedure.
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Avatar universal
I'm 24 and have 4 kids ages 8, 4, 3, and 5 months. My husband and I went back and forth for weeks about me tying my tubes. I felt that if I did I would be denying my body of something and I knew I would regret it. So we agreed that if I got on a semi-permanent birth control he would back off on the tube tying subject. So I got the Implanon and I love it. I dont have a period, havent had any weight gain or anything. And now DH is nagging about having another baby. So good thing I didnt tie them. I would do what makes you comfortable. Marriage is about compromise and sacrificing for eachother. Thats what we did and it worked out perfect. Good Luck
Helpful - 0
743826 tn?1377892189
We are working on baby#4 and are in the tww. We have been having this discussion for awhile. Men worry about the pain and that it will affect their "manhood". Honestly, the hubby and I do not get to have sex as often as we'd like anyway, because of the kids and work. I know of one person who has had a vasectomy and he was swollen and sore for a week or 2. With the economy it's easier to opt vasectomy because of expense. My husband works at a hospital and even their insurance is awful! always has been! I guess we are still debating, but really if I had it done, my mother-in-law would have to come and stay with us and I would go crazy after 2 days of her there. LOL Not that she isn't good, but having someone else invade your house isn't fun, especially when you like things a certain way. I have ocd. ^_^
Helpful - 0
1755520 tn?1330569826
You are very young, and personally i wouldnt want my tubes tied at that age, who knows what your future have insto for you, you may get that little girl later in life, its just to permanant...just do your research on somthing else before you make a decision
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Im22 and pregaz with 4th. 4boys under 5. Im wantin a girl so bad BUT to scared to have anymre which leaves me with geting protected for a long time. I cant have the pill, inplant, injection or coil due to medical reasons so tying tubes was an opion. Would they do it with my age? And what do u think? Should i wait til babys here and older? Stuck for a few months n havent got a clue what i wana do! X
Helpful - 0
1911870 tn?1345419009
Sorry if I offended you. I was just expressing my opinion.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
If you get an IUD make sure they do an ultrasound to confirm placement. My doctor didn't do one and it resulted in my current pregnancy. Apparently most doctors do order an ultrasound but mine was confident she placed it right... 6 months later we found out she was wrong.
Helpful - 0
251790 tn?1317312867
the only thing about the copper iud is it tends to make your period heavier and longer.  I wasn't thrilled about that:(  
Helpful - 0
1755520 tn?1330569826
Thanks you guys he said no to me getting the procedure done and no to him getting his done....lol he basically was like get something to protect us maybe the merina copper..i am still not at ease to getting that either.
Helpful - 0
1901977 tn?1333991726
Maybe the nuva ring? I was on it once because I tend to be forgetful about daily pills, and you only have to change it out about once a month.
Helpful - 0
1194973 tn?1385503904
Anyone that claimed a vasectomy lowers a males sex drive is extremely inaccurate and very wrong. In a vasectomy the only thing that is done is they cut the vas that the sperm travel in to get out of his body. This DOES NOT affect his ability to have sex, his testosterone levels and in fact many men enjoy a more satisfying sex life because the worry of pregnancy is gone.

Before you make such claims, please have a good understanding of what you're talking about.
Helpful - 0
1806883 tn?1458321004
I personally wouldnt do it, I was going to after my 6th  baby (10 yrs ago) as I didnt want anymore, thank goodness I didnt as my relationship broke down and I have since got  re= married and we now have 4 children together :)
Helpful - 0
1927809 tn?1324698400
Agree with morrisfamily2012...
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Lol sorry bout the wrong words my phone writes what it wants oh and as far as the vasectomy I wish y'all would tell my bf that maybe he would get one then we would both b fixed lol
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I had my tubes done and my Dr said that it disentangle cause problems and that if ur period was gonna get worse or last longer it will regardless if I tie ur tubes or not. There r side effects and risk 2 all birth controls. Mine didn't work lol but I plan on doing it again after I have this baby.
Helpful - 0
889551 tn?1416184483
I actually agree with Ashelen on this one.

I know quite a few people who have had their tubes tied, and half of them a much lower sex drive then they did before the tubal. And half of them had their cycle impacted. Of the men I know who have had a vasectomy, they've suffered no ill effects, and it has no bearing on the amount of testosterone produced. Also, their sex drive wasn't lowered in the slightest.

None of the doctors where I am do that procedure that you're talking about with the foam. I'm not sure I would even want to try a new procedure, to be honest.

Out of the two, the vasectomy is the least invasive. And I don't think it's selfish to ask your husband to get a vasectomy if you're both on the same page regarding your family size. After all, someone is going to have to be sterilized or go on birth control in order to not get pregnant again. I don't feel like birth control options, including sterilization, should be rested solely on the woman's shoulders. It takes two to get pregnant. If the man doesn't want a vasectomy, then the woman can consider a tubal or pursue other birth control options. It isn't as though anyone is being forced into sterilization.

Just my two cents...
Helpful - 0
1035252 tn?1427227833
Actually vasectomies don't affect the amount of testosterone a man produces. I know two men who have had vasectomies in the past 5 years, and neither have noticed a decrease in their sex drive. I have a friend who had a tubal done 2 years ago and she has had to go on HRT therapy at age 30 because of the effect it had on her cycle.

So I would say in the experience of my friends, the reverse is true.

I think it's rude of you to say that a woman is selfish to ask her husband to have a vasectomy; after all, a woman is free to ask and if he does not want it he is free to refuse.

Let's remember to respect everyone here, and appreciate other points of view.
Helpful - 0
1911870 tn?1345419009
Men that have vescestmies have lower sex . drive due to lack of testoserone. Also I read an article that men that have vescestmies live shorter lives than the ones who don't. Having your tubes tied does not change a thing with your cycle your, sex drive, and you still produce eggs. I think it's veryy selfish to ask you husbend/bf to have a vescestimy.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
There's a new type of tubal they go in thru your cervix and inject a foam that hardens in your tubes. Its noninvasive and an out patient procedure. They don't even knock you out. No incision no cutting the tubes 1 day recovery.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I'm 22 and my husband is 23. We are on our second child and we've decided to have my tubes tied because of how hard pregnancy is on my body and other health reasons. Since I'm having a repeat c-section it was an easy choice since I'll already be open on the table. We don't see ourselves wanting more children and if we do we are open to adoption. My husband was a foster child who was bounced to multiple homes and if we find ourselves in the position to help we are willing. It's a personal choice that you should discuss in length with your partner. Together I'm sure you'll make the right decision for you. Good luck!
Helpful - 0
1194973 tn?1385503904
How young you are doesn't always matter. I'm 22, my husband is 25 and he just got sterilized Nov. 17th. We only have one child. For us, we didn't want more children, regardless of what happens. Pregnancy was too hard on my body, and it's not something we want to leave to chance. You both need to think long and hard about if you're done. Many women get sterilized and later regret it because they want more. Reversal is not cheap, and is not a 100% guarantee. Try looking into long term birth controls-more easily reversed and not quite so permenant
Helpful - 0
1905116 tn?1444425264
I had my mind made up that i would have no more 5 yrs ago....but here i am 9 wks on. i think when the kids are little its easy to imagine you dont want more as it is hard work and life is chaotic, but now im older and my kids are at school, im shocked at myself but cant wait to have another baby! Dont do anything permanant untill your youngest is at least 5 would be my advice, then you have the option x
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I'm only on my second and I'm thinking real hard to get my tubes tied I'm only 23 but my husband has four kids from prior relationships n I have one from prior this is our first together do u guys think I should do this or not my Drs only concern is that I am so younger and in the near future I may want another but I have my heart set on no more babies
Helpful - 0
1755520 tn?1330569826
i will mos def spread the word i am looking into somethng that will work but not permnant i am not dead said locked on just five kids but for rite now i think five is my limit i have always wanted seven..I KNOW BLESS MY LITTLE HEART..but i want a big family so i will let you know ASAP!!
Helpful - 0
251790 tn?1317312867
I am in the exact same situation.  on my fifth baby and I have a step son.  my husband is not willing to get a vasectomy so I have to make a decision.  birth control hates me!!  I'm scared about a tubal tho..  let us know if you find any thing interesting out on your research:)
Helpful - 0
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