So I know it has been a month or 2 since I have been on medhelp, and I have missed the support thoroughly. Life has been rough here for a while. Conner was diagnosed with GERD and was put on Zantac and prevacid. He is doing much better, and has officially came off of the Prevacid and is only on Zantac now. He has also been teething for about a month now, drooling everywhere, and pooping nonstop lol. My husband and I have also been through the works. He quit taking his PTSD medications shortly after I had Conner, because they made him drowsy and he could not function to save his life. And due to him not taking his meds, we had a HUGE blowout, he downed several seroquel(sleepin/anti phsycotic meds) and was very aggitated. I had to call the police to come get him because he refused to go to the ER. They came and got him, took him to a regular medical facility, pumped his stomach, and held him for 48 hours. From there he went straight to the VA phsyciatric inpatient hospital, and has been there for 2 weeks now. He is doing better, they put him on different medications that help with his PTSD but still allow him to function properly. I have been on my own with all the kids this whole time. He is in the process of being transfered to the VA inpatient PTSD clinic for another 12-18 weeks. It will be a long haul, but well worth it. I am staying with him, because I know what he is going through isn't his direct fault. And because I love him whole heartedly. He isn't a bad person, just mentally sick.
As some of you remember my boxer puppy he got me(Ace), he had died right after my husband left. He had busted out of his doggy crate and ate a whole bottle of my vicodin(from mouth surgery) and passed away from an overdose over night. I found him the next morning. It was heartbreaking, he was such a huge part of our family. I was traumatized for quite sometime, and felt very lonely because not only was my husband gone, but after he left I used Ace as my kind of security blanket for comfort. Im still struggling with his loss to this day, I know he suffered a great deal and it just breaks my heart.
Knowing all of this was going on with Ace, my husband was allowed to come home for a visit one weekend(rare) but we had a family emergancy(Conner fell from his swing) and was hospitalized. He went out and adopted a 5 month old St. Bernard puppy. I wasn't quite ready to have another dog, especially one of this size lol. But Loki has grown on me something feirce. He is an absolute angel for being a giant breed puppy. Very laid back and relaxed, and is absolutely phenomenal(sp) with the boys. I am in total awe and in love with this gentle beast.He has made my loss of Ace a bit easier, and comforts me when I need him the most.
As for Conner falling out of his swing(I know you all are curious), we bought the jungle themed open front swing a few months back. It can swing from side to side and you can switch it to make it swing back and forth. Well Conner LOVED swinging back and forth instead of side to side, and one morning when I put him in his swing and switched it's position, the screw that holds it together fell out and I didnt know. I heard a THUD but no crying so didnt think much of it, figured it was the older boys playing. But about a min or 2 later I heard Conner screaming bloody murder, and so I went in to check on him, and to my disbelief and horror the swings seat had come apart, flipped upside down, and landed on the metal leg. I turned it over and noticed Conner had blood from his nose and mouth, wasn't moving his left arm, and had a huge goose egg sized bump on his tempel area of his head. So I called my step mom who rushed over to watch the older boys and I took Conner to the ER. They did a CT scan of his whole body, focused mainly on his head, and thankfully the CT scan came back normal and no head injuries. He did however dislocate his shoulder, and they put him to sleep to put it back in the socket, put a sling on him and taped his arm to his side so he couldnt move it.
It was a very scary ordeal. My mom called the hospital that DH was at and notified them and they let him come home to see Conner for the weekend, so My mom went and picked him up. I was home by the time she was. I felt so horrible, and like such a bad mother for not checking all the swings parts before putting him in it, I usually check it, because with my 2 yr old and my giant dog, they tend to bump into it and Aiden tends to play with the snaps, straps and toys. It was heart breaking and so effing scary to see my baby (4 months old soon) covered in blood and screaming. I think he lost conciousness because he didnt cry right away. They had me wake him up every 30 to 60 min for 48 hours for fear that they might have missed a small concussion.
Then one my way to see DH at the hospital I was in an accident. I was injured and neither was the other driver. I didnt have the kids because you have to be atleast 14 yrs old to visit. The man was in the left lane I in the right lane, and a car infront of me moved to the left and cut another car off, to keep from hitting the car in the rear the man switched lanes, but didnt clear my cars rear. I surprisingly didnt lose control, pulled over got insurance info, and my car was okay besides an off balance tire and a lost rivet holding the bumper together(easily replaced). So I carried on and went to see Barry anyways lol.
THEN 3 days later coming home from seeing DH, it was snowing something mad. Freeway speeds were down to 30mph, although living in MI people here act as if snow is a phenomonon(sp) and cant drive in it. I merged to the *very slow lane* as my little mazda s u c ks in winter conditions, and even in the slow lane someone infront of me decided to try and get off the highway, then decided it was the wrong exit and cut me off. I slammed on my breaks and my car decided to act as if it was a merry go round, and spun into the far left lanes. Thankfully no one hit me, and I didnt hit the retaining wall, so I just caught my breath, undizzied myself and continued home.
UHG! It's been an eventful few months. Im waiting a phone call from DH to see if they are letting him come home till the 21st before leaving another 12-18 weeks. Aiden and Michael's birthdays are the 16th and 19th, and we are having their party at chuck e cheeses on the 21st. I hope they allow him to come home. It will break their hearts if daddy missed it. Michael knows daddy is going to get his *head* fixed or so he calls it, and understands. But he has been begging DH over the phone to be at his party. We will see. I know DH wants to be there, but he also wants to get the help he needs to be a better dad and hubby, even if it means missing this years bday parties.
Anyways, thats my update. Im going to try to be on more often. It helps having support even though it is online. I know all is going to be okay. Okay I need to make the boys lunch.
OH BTW: Conner is now on baby food. Just about a tablespoon once a day to get used to it. He loves it! Especially blueberries lol.