Aa
we had a fight....can I get some support from you guys?
Im 13 weeks. Ive been pretty calm, but me and ********* (babys father) just had an argument. It got pretty heated. I stomped around and tried to punch him. I was able to calm myself down after our fight that lasted like 20 min. I dont want to hurt my baby. Am I a bad mom? Is my little one ok
I had the exact problem the other night with my boyfriend. Exact same.... he was drinking and just being a jerk. I think he is really stressed about the baby. It came scarily close to being a physical fight. I got very stressed out and really wanted to leave and stay at my girlfriends place for the night. We have never caught like that before. I've also never seen him act that crazy before. It really scared me. The next day I felt horrible from the stress. And he sure felt like an idiot. He doesn't drink often, but I told him that he can't drink anymore because its not safe for our child. I also told him if an incident like this took place again I would leave him. I won't put up with that craps for one second!
And tom os normally amazing. Very good to me and supportive. Tonight he had some liquid jerk in him. We will be fine. I dont take crap so im going to stay at my moms for a few days and let him center himself because I wont allow alcohol to be an excuse
Thank you ladies. He had some drinks tonight and was just being argumentative. @specialmom I do have a history of anxiety due to battling ptsd. I regularly see a therapist and I have it under control. I havent had a panic attack in over a year. But it seems with the onset of these hormones, I get upset easier.I have gotten so used to living a much more peaceful life, but its getting hard sometimes. I am just glad I recognized it and was able to calm down fairly quickly.
Oh and PS: we all lose our temper from time to time. We all aren't perfect and I'm definitely mad at your boyfriend for upsetting you so much!!
Your baby is fine... my hubby and I fought quite a bit when I was first pregnant... but we get to blame it on the hormones... just try not to stress yourself out to much they feel (the fetus) your emotions...plus when the baby starts being able to hear from inside the womb it'll recognize the father's voice, if he's angry and yells a lot the baby may become frightened of him.... but things will get better
Hi there. Your baby is fine but the question is, how are you?? How is your boyfriend?? I always get worried when a couple is having volatile fights that even escalate to almost being physical. I think some self help reading on managing emotions and anger could really help you. Hormones certainly don't help but also can't be blamed for out of control behavior entirely. If there is any pattern for how stress and anger are dealt with that is negative, we have to teach ourselves how to handle it better. This does help us be better partners to our significant other and better parents to our children.
Don't feel alone. So many have to work on these skills!! It's a common subject that psychologists and therapists deal with on a daily basis.
Have you ever practiced yoga breathing or any things like square breathing? This is when you breath in for four, hold four, breath out for four, hold four and repeat. This helps slow our blood pressure down and calms our nervous system when we are 'exploding' with anger. Do this first before reacting. Slow down the process of anger. When you start to feel it bubble up--- there are often some little warning signs that you are going to blow . . . actively stop the process. See it coming and then have things you do to stop yourself from blowing up. These are the things I think I mentioned on another post like taking a walk, breathing exercises, writing in a journal, cleaning a toilet, whatever.
Then you can come back to address whatever issue there is with you and your boyfriend. I'm sure he is no angel either in terms of how he handles things but we can only control ourselves. Then long term, work on things you have fights about all the time to fix those so they stop coming back up over and over (as many couples fight about similar things often).
lots of luck. Your baby is just fine but I want you and your boyfriend to be fine. :>)
Don't feel alone. So many have to work on these skills!! It's a common subject that psychologists and therapists deal with on a daily basis.
Have you ever practiced yoga breathing or any things like square breathing? This is when you breath in for four, hold four, breath out for four, hold four and repeat. This helps slow our blood pressure down and calms our nervous system when we are 'exploding' with anger. Do this first before reacting. Slow down the process of anger. When you start to feel it bubble up--- there are often some little warning signs that you are going to blow . . . actively stop the process. See it coming and then have things you do to stop yourself from blowing up. These are the things I think I mentioned on another post like taking a walk, breathing exercises, writing in a journal, cleaning a toilet, whatever.
Then you can come back to address whatever issue there is with you and your boyfriend. I'm sure he is no angel either in terms of how he handles things but we can only control ourselves. Then long term, work on things you have fights about all the time to fix those so they stop coming back up over and over (as many couples fight about similar things often).
lots of luck. Your baby is just fine but I want you and your boyfriend to be fine. :>)
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