baby in room

[shell0209]

I'm taking a poll on if for the first few nights having the baby in a bassinet by the bed or just starting right off having baby in own room.

Future mother in law doesn't like the idea of having baby in our room at all and asked why on earth I wanted the pack and play with the bassinet changing area. She's very opinionated

[angela418]

We kept my 17 month old son in our room in the pack n play for 4 months and then moved him to his crib in his own room.  He's been fine in there ever since - and we've even moved twice!  He's about to move to a "big boy bed" in his new room when we have this baby and she will have the baby room.  We'll keep her in our room for the first 2-4 months as well, as it's easier w/ nursing in the middle of the night and all.  Plus, as I am sure we aren't the only overly-worried parents, it's easier to just lean over our bed to make sure she's still breathing in the middle of the night.  
Do not let anyone sway you on what you feel most comfortable with.  This is what worked for us, as I nursed my son, so it was less we had to do in the middle of the night to just go to the foot of the bed to get him and change him and all that.  Good luck to you!

[jtaylor102481]

it is ur choice what u wish to do with ur lil one. I have kept the baby in the room with me in bassinet   by my bed I just found it easier when they are that lil  to have them close by to be able to  just pick them up nurse them and take care of what ever they need. but everybody is different and every baby is different so it is best to go with what ur gut tells u to and what works the best for u  good luck

[Michele, Katy, TX]

Ugh...drives me crazy when someone offers unsolicited advice.  I still get it and I am on #7!  As everyone here has said, it is YOUR baby and you have to do what YOU feel comfortable with.  Don't let someone, including family, "bully" you into doing something just because THEY think they know better.

I have co-slept with all of my kids and/or had them in my same room.  My 3rd was weird and didn't want to co-sleep.  I have no idea why, but I had to physically get up and stay up with her and I was exhausted.  I had a 9 year old and an 18 month old when she was born.  So I couldn't nap during the day unless the stars were aligned and she napped at the same time as the 18 month old.  LOL!  I was so tired, so I do whatever I have to to get sleep and to make me feel better from a mom's stand point, such as safety.

Go w/ your gut and do what you feel is best.  You will see with a little time and experience, what works best for YOU and YOUR baby :)  Good luck!

[vacuumprincess]

This is YOUR baby.  

I plan to put my newborn in her own room, but that is because I do not have a basinette.  I don't really have space for the crim in my bedroom, but that doesnt mean
I won't try to drag it in!

With my first child I had the crib in my room for the first few months.  I still got up & sat by her bed to make sure she was breathing!

Think about this... When your mother in law last had a baby she prob didn't use car seats (if you are as old as me she didn't).  parents held babies on laps when in the car.  Crib bed rails were far enough apart to fit a newborn head through!  Parents smoked like chimneys & then put the baby down on their stomachs to sleep with thick quilts.  They fed babies formula made up of corn syrup & evaporated milk.  

We have come a long way in knowing what is best for baby.  I certainly wouldn't mention ANY of this to her, but just tell her you appreciate her advise, but you feel more comfortable with the baby in your room.  You could even turn it into a joke saying, "yes.  I'm going to be one of those moms... the overprotective ones!"

You will know you are right about your decisions without hurting an elders feelings by telling her she did it all wrong when her son was a baby.

[sherrycoup]

I had my daughter in the room with us for approx 2 mths then moved her into her own room in the crib.  We never let her sleep with us(with exception maybe 3 or 4 times as a newborn who wouldnt go back to sleep) and still don't let her come into our bed.  Its a hard habit to get out of so never wanted to start that.  Sure its tiring getting up but we do it.  Just nap when they nap.  We all make it through.

[moni21]

It was the choice of my hubby and I not to have our children sleep in our rooms so they both slept in their crib in their own rooms from day one. I woke up very easily when they began to get fussy and I would go to their room to nurse/bottle feed. I stayed until they were asleep and then went back to my own room. This worked for us great. For this next child, we will do the same. But like the ladies stated before me, it is your choice and what you are comfortable with.

[HaYnSweetie]

My son sleeps in a bassinet right next to my bed. He'll be 4 months on the 28th. Sometimes i let him sleep in the bed with DH & i, when hes tired, but cant seem to fall asleep i lay down with him, he likes to cuddle against my chest...it puts him right to sleep and if not, he just lays there and smiles at me. He'll probably be sleeping my my room for a couple years lol, im so clingy to my baby that im with him 24/7...unless im at work. I even take him with me to the gym lol.

[babycrazy113]

I never had any of my children sleep in my room.  I wanted to get into a routine right away.  Plus my dh and I took turns every other night getting up and this way it didn't disturb both of us every night.  But like the other women on here said, it is totally your choice and this is YOUR child, NOT you mil's!  Do what you feel comfortable with and what makes sense to you!!  

[Ashelen]

I co-slept with both of my babies...my daughter slept in the bed with us for the first 16 months, and when we offered her her own bed she transitioned without a problem. My son co-slept with us for the first 9 months, but when we moved last month we set up his crib in our room and he had no trouble sleeping on his own.

I feel much safer and much more comfortable with the newborn in the same room, if not the same bed. My daughter slept in the same bed for a long time, but my son was put in his bassinet right next to my side of the bed after about 3 months.

studies are beginning to support co-sleeping as a way to PREVENT SIDS, if done correctly*. they say that the baby feeling the mother's breathing and heartbeat helps to regulate their systems and lowers the risk of the baby suddenly stopping breathing. but they say a bassinet in the same room is safer (for obvious reasons) and the mother becomes more in-tune with the baby's breathing and heart rythyms and is more likely to wake if there's a problem. not sure about that, but I read a study that stated that.


(*doing it correctly is the key...you have to observe all safety suggestions to minimize the risk of sharing an adult bed.)

[tiredbuthappy]

both were in my room until 6 and 8 months. Saved me a lot of sleep and gave me piece of mind. Neither had any problems going in to their own crib in their room after that.

[AMINOHIO]

With my previous two children, they stayed in my room in their bassinet until they slept through the night (about 3 months). Then, I moved them to the crib in their nursery. I never had any trouble with the transition.

I'm now pregnant with my third and this baby will be staying in my room as well. I actually just put her crib up in my room two nights ago. Due to space constraints, she'll be in my room longer than the other two.

[snagglepuss1]

I think it's best in the beginning to have baby in with you, my dd stayed in with us until 8 months, we had a moses basket in our room when ds1 was born but he outgrew it by 3 months and then went in with his sister, i wasnt ready for that and never felt really happy with it until he was 9 months. ds2 was in with us until around 8 months as well. currently ttc number 4 and same rules apply around the 8/9 month mark we disturbed them much more in the night so it made sense for them to go into a shared sibling/own room then. also if you are breast feeding its nicer to have the baby closer for night feeds!

[LosingMyMindInGA]

I have ALWAYS far preferred to have my newborn in my room, if not in my bed.  My oldest slept in a crib next to my bed for the first year (no choice there, I was living with my Mom and had to share a room).  My middle two had their own rooms with cribs, but ended up sleeping with us most nights the first few years.  My 4th slept with us the first couple of months, then when we moved and I could fit his crib in our room, he slept in there til he was two (again there were space constraints).  Now my 8 month old sleeps in her crib in our room.  She slept in her bassinett next to my bed until she was about 5 months then I moved her to the crib.  

I find that having them so close makes it MUCH easier for the middle of the night feedings or just simple wakings that only require getting up and giving a pacifier and a pat on the rump.  It's also less likely to disturb anyone else in the house.  

I think your mother in law may have well intentioned advice, but now is a good time to learn that advice, no matter how well intentioned, is just that.  Its not something you HAVE to abide by.  This is yours and your husbands child and the two of you decide what is best for you and your baby. Just thank you MIL for her advice but kindly let her know that while you understand her feelings behind it, that you and DH are from a different time and believe this will be best.  She may or may not understand, but frankly that's her problem.  

[FutureMom32]

I would say bassinet in my room because it will be easier for breastfeeding

[chapina]

I started off with baby in her crib and it was a hassle getting up feeding her, and then putting her to sleep; like Brittany said all that ordeal took too much precious sleeping time. Now I co-sleep (dh was against it @first but after I made him see and stay up with me he finally agreed) and its soooo much easier. But you have to do what you feel best for your child.

[chapina]

I started off with baby in her crib and it was a hassle getting up feeding her, and then putting her to sleep; like Brittany said all that ordeal took too much precious sleeping time. Now I co-sleep (dh was against it @first but after I made him see and stay up with me he finally agreed) and its soooo much easier. But you have to do what you feel best for your child.

[mami2karina]

I have to know my baby is okay! I put my 2 year old's crib up in his room but he's never used it lol. Won't even sleep in it now as toddler bed. I love having my babies right there with me.

[chantal21]

*2-3 hours...  sorry for the typo...must have been typing too quickly!!

[chantal21]

I have a co-sleeper that attaches to the side of the bed. It's nice to just roll over in the middle of the night and get the baby and nurse. I can't imagine having to get up every 2-3 house at first to go in another room. I kept my first with me in the room until he was 7-8 months. My second I kept with me until he was almost 11 months (he had health issues and has since passed) With this one, I plan on doing it again. I like to keep them close until I feel they are ready to be in their own room, which is usually once they sleep through the night entirely and every baby is a little bit different. But you have to do what feels right for you, not what others want you to do.

[mami2karina]

I co-sleep. All of my babies have slept with me. They start out sleeping on my chest and after that in the crook of my arm. I'm a light sleeper and don't sleep much normally anyways so I've never had a problem so no judgements please! So this baby will be sleeping with us. Our 2 year old is still in bed with us so we've gotta figure this one out!

[Clysta]

I agree with Brittny. You have to do what you feel is right for your baby and your family. I get criticism all the time from my DH's grandmother, and I just smile and say we'll do it when we want to.

[Brittny27]

Oh yeah just rememeber that this is YOUR baby not your MIL's. There will always be someone with an opinion on how you should raise your baby. You don't have to listen to them. Do what you feel is BEST for YOU and YOUR baby. What worked for her may not work for you. So much has changed in the past 20 years on raising children.

[Brittny27]

I had my baby in my room in the bassinet on the pack n play for the first 5 months. I then moved the pack n play into her room for about a week then moved her to her crib. She had no issues with the transition at all.

I breastfed and it was much easier to reach her and get her fed before her small little cry turned into a screaming cry causing her to wake fully up and take longer to go back to sleep. If you have the baby in your bed with you like I did many nights you can feed them while you sleep so you don't actually miss out on any sleep and are more rested and are able to function fine during the day.

[Clysta]

I picked bassinet in room. I personally co-slept (and still do), and I find with the baby in the room with me it's much easier to attend to their needs faster.