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how/when to tell your boss
At what point do you tell your boss? Do you wait to see what he offers as time off (mine would be unpaid) or tell him what you are planning to take? What did you guys do or plan to do?
Just a suggestion, but in order to get something like that from him, you could say you're reading some self-help book or taking a professional development course online or something and it is having you go through and track your progress and spot-check your goals and whatnot...
It will also help you over the next few months to make sure you meet expectations, as it may become difficult to do so as your pregnancy progresses. "Pregnancy Brain" was something i was wholly unprepared for this time around with a much more high-caliber job. The medical leave (short term disability) I'm on right now is actually a double-blessing as it gives me a chance to work on overcoming pregnancy brain and getting my head back in the game!
Just to give you another perspective also, I am not quite in your shoes, since my employer is huge, but my profession is VERY competitive and the director of my dept is not an easy person to deal with... plus my position is something necessary and specialized---it has to be done whether I'm there or not, and can't be done from home. So I'm terrified that even from this short term disability I will find myself replaced... I was about 18 weeks when my condition began and am now 28 weeks and it hasn't resolved yet. They don't know if it will or not by the time I deliver. If it doesn't, then I'll actually max out my "short term disability plus maternity leave" 4 wks after I'm due to deliver, heh.
So I feel your fear at least... let us know how it goes!! Maybe something in the unfolding of your journey can help those of us with similar fears and problems... hang in there :-)
It will also help you over the next few months to make sure you meet expectations, as it may become difficult to do so as your pregnancy progresses. "Pregnancy Brain" was something i was wholly unprepared for this time around with a much more high-caliber job. The medical leave (short term disability) I'm on right now is actually a double-blessing as it gives me a chance to work on overcoming pregnancy brain and getting my head back in the game!
Just to give you another perspective also, I am not quite in your shoes, since my employer is huge, but my profession is VERY competitive and the director of my dept is not an easy person to deal with... plus my position is something necessary and specialized---it has to be done whether I'm there or not, and can't be done from home. So I'm terrified that even from this short term disability I will find myself replaced... I was about 18 weeks when my condition began and am now 28 weeks and it hasn't resolved yet. They don't know if it will or not by the time I deliver. If it doesn't, then I'll actually max out my "short term disability plus maternity leave" 4 wks after I'm due to deliver, heh.
So I feel your fear at least... let us know how it goes!! Maybe something in the unfolding of your journey can help those of us with similar fears and problems... hang in there :-)
that is a great idea. I am just leary of it because he hired me saying that I have to make certain goals. I am doing fine but can see him saying that I am not. How do you ask for something like that with out him thinking something is up?
Kjbucher~ BEFORE YOU EVER BRING UP BEING PREGNANT WITH YOUR BOSS get something from him saying your doing your job... or a note about how good your conduct... etc. has been.
Because alot of times IF they fire you they'll say that its' due to your performance failing......
Heck....even call a lawyer in your area or something IF you think he might fire you...
Because alot of times IF they fire you they'll say that its' due to your performance failing......
Heck....even call a lawyer in your area or something IF you think he might fire you...
Thanks so much everyone!! I feel much better that at least he can not fire me just for being pregnant. Everything else I can handle! I feel much better. So I am thinking at about 15 weeks I will tell him. I get a huge commission check on 5/5 that is financing half of my unpaid leave so I want to make sure that is in my hand before I say a word. i cant jeopardize that!
I am sorry that you are in such a tough situation, but i would hope that your boss will be understanding enough to give a little time off. Especially if you can work from home, like you said you wouldn't need nearly as much time. I know it wouldn't be ideal, but i am sure do-able. I guess i would just try to give him as much of a heads up as possible just so it doesn't come as a huge surprise closer to the end of your pregnancy. I don't know much about the different laws and such, so i am not much help i that aspect - Sorry!!Once again, i am sorry you are in this situation and i wish you all the best!!
Well that's good :)
He cannot fire you for being pregnant, he would have to find another valid reason if he wanted to get rid of you. Unless the laws are different every state, pregnancy is not a valid reason to fire someone.
He cannot fire you for being pregnant, he would have to find another valid reason if he wanted to get rid of you. Unless the laws are different every state, pregnancy is not a valid reason to fire someone.
fortunately I will have enough money saved up that I can take two months unpaid leave, should he allow that. (Since I work from home, I dont need a ton of leave, I can do most of my job laying in bed!) Even if he tells me I dont have a job at the end of the two months that is fine too, because I can find something by then. My main concern is that I want to be nice and give him plenty of notice, but I dont want to find myself out of a job 6.5 months early or I will not have the money to take off 2 months!! I looked up FMLA laws in MD and it sounds like they dont apply to me, but my main concern is that not being covered under FMLA has nothing to do with him being able to fire me now. I was ill last night about this!!
I hope that didn't sound sassy, I didn't mean for it to. We really would be in a great deal of financial trouble though with no money coming in from me so I dont really want to hear negative comments from anyone.
sweetangel- You are entitled to your opinion but I am doing what is best for me and my family, without my unemployment we wouldn't be able to pay rent.
Also, maybe it is different in every state but right now the job search portion of unemployment is being waived.
Also, maybe it is different in every state but right now the job search portion of unemployment is being waived.
Just thought I'd share...FMLA only guarantees you 12 weeks off and guarantees that your company will contribute to your benefits system as if you were still a working employee...it has nothing to do with paid time...I WISH!!! I have to go a month with no pay!!!!
And, this might sound negative, but I don't think people should be asking to get laid off especially in this economy where unemployment is at its highest and there are people who TRULY were laid off due to no circumstance of their own or in their control and they are struggling to get benefits. ALSO, you have to fill out paper work everyweek saying that you are looking for work and no one will hire you. IF you are just out with your baby and not actually looking for work and filling out your paperwork as if you were, this would be fraud.
Good luck...I hope you can work something out with your boss!
And, this might sound negative, but I don't think people should be asking to get laid off especially in this economy where unemployment is at its highest and there are people who TRULY were laid off due to no circumstance of their own or in their control and they are struggling to get benefits. ALSO, you have to fill out paper work everyweek saying that you are looking for work and no one will hire you. IF you are just out with your baby and not actually looking for work and filling out your paperwork as if you were, this would be fraud.
Good luck...I hope you can work something out with your boss!
NO he cannot fire you, that is illegal even if you aren't covered by FLMA. I am also employed by a small company and I do not get any kind of leave. My employer said for me just to let him know when I am unable to work. Luckily, my boss is kind enough to lay me off so that I can collect unemployment, you may want to discuss that with your boss.
No he cant legally fire you because you are pregnant, but becuase the company is so small there are certain plans like the FMLA or even medical benefits that he does NOT have to offer because of the number of employees he has...... so worse comes to worse you will probably just end up taking your leave unpaid (Man that *****!) like you said.... Hey maybe he will be really great about it! Ya never know
Well, unfortunately if there are only 5 employees, you are not covered by FMLA. If I were you, I would tell your boss as soon as possible to open up a dialog between the two of you about your needs and expectations as well as his. I think if you give him more time to prepare etc. he will be more generous to you in the long run as well as more understanding if you have complications.
Good luck...
Good luck...
my employer only has 5 employees. He IS the HR dept. haha. He has also never had a pregnant employee. He took all of us once we had our babies.
In the united states you LEGALLY do not have to tell your boss your even pregnant until you take maternity leave.
Your in Baltimore~ It's federal law if your employer has more than 50 employees that he/she offer maternity leave of MINIMUM 6w for normal birth, 8w for csection.
There's also a provision I believe that says you can get up to a month off DURING your pregnancy, as well as extra breaks if you deal with Morning sickness. etc.
They don't have to be paid, but they have to be offered.
I live in California, the law is a bit different. You need to speak to your HR dept. about it. OR go to your local Unemployment center to find out the rules. They should have them there.
When I was pregnant with TJ I delt with HG so I HAD to get up to 4 extra breaks a day to throw up. I had a dr.'s note saying it would go to the end of pregnancy. Then I got off a month early due to complications. by the end I wound up not going back due to TJ's health issues.... but they'd rehire me if I wanted a job there again.
Your in Baltimore~ It's federal law if your employer has more than 50 employees that he/she offer maternity leave of MINIMUM 6w for normal birth, 8w for csection.
There's also a provision I believe that says you can get up to a month off DURING your pregnancy, as well as extra breaks if you deal with Morning sickness. etc.
They don't have to be paid, but they have to be offered.
I live in California, the law is a bit different. You need to speak to your HR dept. about it. OR go to your local Unemployment center to find out the rules. They should have them there.
When I was pregnant with TJ I delt with HG so I HAD to get up to 4 extra breaks a day to throw up. I had a dr.'s note saying it would go to the end of pregnancy. Then I got off a month early due to complications. by the end I wound up not going back due to TJ's health issues.... but they'd rehire me if I wanted a job there again.
In Canada we get an entire year off for maternity leave, so I can't really help you with the "see what he offers" part of your question....Basically, when I was PG, I couldn't tell my former boss until I was 16 weeks and starting to show - I was covering a contract at work (ironically, another maternity leave) and the girl was due to come back about the same time that I would have liked to make the announcement. But then she said she wasn't sure if she was going to come back and requested (and received) an unpaid leave of absence, an extension of her maternity leave. Finally, I had to say something...and luckily for me, she ultimately decided not to come back and I was made full-time a month before I was due to go on mat leave.
Good luck - telling your boss can be difficult, especially if you unsure of how he/she will react.
Good luck - telling your boss can be difficult, especially if you unsure of how he/she will react.
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