hubby holding out :(

[frogs_n_butterfly]

We've had many issues over the years as he is/was an alcoholic well he's decided to turn over a New leaf and let go of hard liquor which has been a success for 4 weeks now. Well like I said we've had many issues and I'm trying to allow him back into my heart it's been very hard though, long story short he's upset I haven't forgiven him but I feel like he should be kissing my *** so to speak yes yes it sounds bad but anyway I really want sex from him and not just sex but making love like we used to, the last time was a couple weeks ago and no kissing no talking just in out done... Its really hard to talk to him and being 32 weeks prego I don't feel like I know how to be sexy with a big ol belly lol anyway if you're still reading... help please???

[LarissadeRuyter777]

I think sometimes you have to show him you forgive him. Love is a verb. It's what you do not what you say. He is showing you his love by quitting drinking. I'd spend some time thinking about how your honey likes to be loved. Cooking his favourite meal? A back massage? Look at him deeply, tell him you love him after you have shown him, give him a teasing kiss, smile put on some music and dance and do the dishes. He won't know what has gotten into you but he'll want some.
Guilt and fear are paralyzing. If he thinks you are still upset it may be hard for him to initiate. Extend Grace.

[Nicky53014]

Right,  but you stayed with him through it all. Trust me I've been where you are abd worse. My husband has done some pretty horrible things but when we finally went to counseling, I learned to forgive him and move on when he's now showing me he's changing because he didn't want to loose his family. I say this to say, move on And let the past be the past since you chose to forgive him by staying. But if you got it, good luck!

[frogs_n_butterfly]

I know it sounded bad but after years of pain he's put me and our kids through that's just how I feel. I'm trying very hard to encourage him and praise him but I don't want him to stop for us he has to stop for himself or it'll never work. I won't post our life story I just don't know how to ignite our flame again.

[mee25]

If he is trying hard to quit for you and the baby i think you should help and support him emotionally. It will boost his confidence and mybe knowing that you are here for him will make things easier.

[Nicky53014]

I agree^^^ he's showing you change and that should be enough in itself... marriage is compromise so let it go if you want him to make love to you!  And not just in and out

[RockRose]

Well,  first off,  if he's chosen to quit drinking for you that's a huge step.  I'm not sure he also needs to be kissing your *** as you say,  quitting in itself is a huge challenge and a gift to you.  

Sounds like he's trying really hard to improve.