in laws

[em_mummytobe]

I am only six weeks and already having trouble with the in laws. I want my mum and partner there but nobody else for my ultrasound. My partner said his mum has to go to one ultrasound but I dont want her there, I want my mum for support and obviously my partner but thats all. I can tell she is going to be controlling and I will not let that happen but I will end up looking like the *****. Any one else have similar problems?

[mitch_14]

I think if your partner wants her to the ultrasound and you are taking your mom she should be allowed. It would be different if you were giving birth but you have to realize she is his family to and will be the grandmother of your baby and you are setting yourself up for a lot of hate from his family by only letting your family to be involved and risk hurting your partner. Goodluck hope you find a way to make it work for all of you...

[RockRose]

em,  this isn't the way to start off your relationship with your partner's family.

Unless your partner's mother has done something to undermine you and harm you,  or unless she is absolutely unbearable to be around,  you need to be more welcoming to her in my opinion.

How would it feel to you if your partner was the one carrying the baby,  and he excluded your mother kind of just because he had the right to?  

Again,  if she's undermining you in some way or has evil intent,  that's one thing.  But if you're hurting her and your partner just because you have the ability to do it,  this is going to be one very long series of battles you are setting yourself up for.

[lwolfe520]

Maybe someone can record it so she can watch it later?

[hlouella]

At least she wants to be involved there is a limit to overstepping boundaries but one apt wont hurt. Its no diff than your mom being there. My babys father lost his mom if she were here and wanted to be involved I would let her. Her passing is hard I wish she were here.

[pumpkin_buns]

Maybe try to find another compromise so that you can have a good relationship with his family

[MommaKelleyy]

Maybe she just wants to go to one to see and not feel left out. Ask your partner why she's wants to be there

[lwolfe520]

My mother in law has decided to invite herself and her sister to come stay at my house right when I have the baby
shes Korean so idk how to say no I'm just going along but im so worried she is controlling and kinda koo koo
I worry she will tell me how to do things and judge me. My husband and I got married in Hawaii and at first she was excited but later tried for us to marry in San Antonio and when we said no she got mad and wouldn't talk to my husband
Later she gave in and begged us to let her plan the after wedding dinner well she had us go far to some Korean place the food was weird only her family from Korea liked it we played with our food and ate just to be nice
she is very generous when it comes to money or gifts like she sent us 2,000 to get what we needed for baby and pay bills but she is controlling too so I kinda know what its like to have to deal with this kinda thing

[xMommy2Be_]

You can tell your doctor to tell her she can't come in. Your partner should obey your decision.

[SamanthaUresti]

I am the EXACT same way. My fiancé has yet to be at an appointment because its hard for me to be comfortable with it. Its a private thing and it should be shared with who your comfortable with.  Your not over reacting it should be what you want

[em_mummytobe]

Thanks hun, its not that I dont want her around but I dont want her at my appointments or ultrasounds, I am a very private person. And my partner not so much, I dont want my ultrasounds to be a family event. But thanks I wasnt sure if I was over reacting and being a ***** about it

[SamanthaUresti]

Not exactly but similar. I dont talk to my fiancés mother because of drug use and I had to stand my ground until he realized I didn't want her around. So stand your ground and do what YOU want dont let them feel like she HAS to be there. Itll be tough but don't give up. My best wishes to you