Divided House?

[Wheatbread]

First of all I apologize for the long backstory.
So, me and the father of my child broke up before I discovered I was pregnant. He said he still wanted to be a part of her life and help with anything that I might need. Well, there were a lot of things that happened within the first few months of my pregnancy which essentially lead to me not trusting him or wanting him around me. All he did was cause constant stress and it seemed that he would always find a way to pick a fight over the smallest things. So we went about 2-3 months with no communication. During this time he in no way made any attempt to contact me or anyone about how the baby was doing or whether I was even still pregnant. Now, I understand that I had told him I'd rather he not come around, but for someone who talked so much about 'fighting' for their child, he made absolutely no efforts. It seemed to me as though he was content with not being around. Anyway, he eventually messaged me just a few weeks ago and I put everything behind us and we began to discuss things that were going to have to be done. One thing we kind of disagreed on was visitation. I do plan on letting him see her and spend time with her, but I told him she wouldn't be spending the night with him for a while. At least not while she is an infant. I want to wait until she is at least 2 before she stays the night with anyone besides me...he got pretty angry and told me she will be staying with him. It's not a matter of pettiness or 'ownership'. I still just don't really trust him, and I want her to be safe. I honestly don't feel that he can be trusted with an infant... Am I wrong to feel that way? What would you suggest I do?

[ciaramarieg]

If you don't trust him don't take the risk. While she's an infant especially. I'm in the same boat kind of with my baby daddy. My best excuse is that I'm breastfeeding her for the first year.

[FloridaMommyof2]

You have full rights to your child. However unless y'all go to court and a judge says that she can stay with him then it's up to you. Even if his name is on the birth certificate its still up to you unless a judge says other wise. Now being that he hasn't been around there's no reason for him to have her that young. And as a mother we care for the safety of our children over everything else. If you don't feel like he is able to do it then don't let him. The only way he gets what he wants is if a judge says so.