Am i wrong?

[ammanda]

Okay so I had a concern with my childs safty.  My Df's lil sister has this thing with dating guys online and meeting them, and recently she met her "new boyfriend" in person and he stayed at her house all weekend. well i messaged her mom and said i cant have my son staying there if there gonna have strangers at there house.  Its my responsibility to protect my son right? so thats what im gonna do.  hes my baby and if i dont protect him, then no one will.  So i told her how i felt about it, and now shes upset with me and her daughter just attacked me for it.  Am i wrong.  You dont know who these guys are or what there capable of, i dont care if they want to put there selves in that situation, but i refuse to put my son in it.  Ugh this is too much, im supposed to be worrying about me and the birth of my son soon. i dont need this stress and drama

[LosingMyMindInGA]

You are ABSOLUTELY NOT WRONG.  Your SIL may see nothing wrong with it, and these may be the most respectable men.  But a) you just NEVER know and it's better to err on the side of caution than for something to happen b) It's not teaching your son well for him to see his aunt having random guys come over and possibly spend the night.  It doesn't send a good message to him about how a man is supposed to treat a women.  I think your SIL is so pissed becuase deep down she KNOWS she's not making very wise decisions.  As for your MIL well, let her be pissed.  This is your child, your decision. If it were me I'd tell her point blank "Can you gaurantee one of these men is not a child molester, rapist or murderer?  Can you tell me beyond a reasonable doubt that She (meaning sil) knows these men well enough to say with any level of certainty that they aren't?  I'm not willing to risk it and if the two of you can't understand that, well, Frankly, that's not my concern.  My concern is for my child and what his father and I feel is best for him"  It probably won't make them happy but who cares.

[kerriekab]

OMG you were so right to do this. You have to protect your son and they should understand that. These people could be anybody, you don't know them. Don't feel bad for doing the right thing.

[mom2ariana]

no definitely not. i know im repeating myself but no i think you were absolutely right to say something. and i read the message it wasn't mean or rude it was honest and thats what needed to happen. cole is helpless to defend himself and needs his mom & dad to protect him. and that is what you are doing..it's yall's job and i think you handled it appropriately. i know its hard to talk to them in person..and i dont know them so it might have been better handled over the internet then in person...some people take things better that way. don't feel guilty, don't stress about it. at the end of the day its YOUR decision whether or not cole goes over there. and if she cares about her grandson & catie cares about her nephew they need to understand your decision and support it. if not, then oh well. they wont see him as much.

[Ashelen]

No, you're 100% correct. You push this crap out of your head and focus on your body and your baby....ANY "new boyfriend" should have to prove himself (through time and actions) to be trustworthy before he's given the all-clear to hang around YOUR child without you there to keep him safe...and whether or not you ever become comfortable with him is UP TO YOU. And you're absolutely right, the internet aspect makes it that much more unpredictable. I'm not saying that the guys can't be perfectly nice and safe...but you are absolutely right it not letting your son stay there, away from you, with these strangers in the house. because that's what they are. strangers.

You're right, don't back down.