SAHM - poll

[LauraB78]

** I HATE MY JOB...  A LITTLE POLL**

I was just wondering how many of you are SAHM's? And if so, are you single or in a relationship, and how do you make ends meet and what do you do for health insurance? Thanks!

[LauraB78]

**BUMP**

[mami1323]

I'm a working mom, sorry.  I wish I could afford to be a sahm.  I get health insurance through my job and my fiance doesn't so I need to work.  Sorry, wish I could help but finances won't allow it on our end.

[LauraB78]

I am in the same boat. I am single and have  a *decent*  job (in terms of hours and health insurance). I am just feeling like the system is failing me. Once Jaxson arrives, I have no idea how I will cover all the new expenses and I have not qualified for WIC or short-term rental assistance. I also was never offered short term disablility when I started here, so my maternity leave is 100% unpaid. I am wondering if I should just quit, and go on assistance. I have never as much as collected 1 unemployment check and have been paying into all the "programs" for over 15 years.. It's interesting that people that actually need help while working, cannot obtain it..  Makes me crazy..

I wish I would hit a scratch ticket!

**SIGH** Then I could be a SAHM... Truth is, I don't mind working. I just wish I could get a little assistance to either go to school or just work part time.. Day care is ridiculous!!

[EAnthes]

Well, I'm not yet a mom but my hubby gets really good insurance through the army and once we get his pay straightened out we'll have money to spare to pay off all his student loans from before he joined up.  (Well, we'll have money to spare as long as my dad lets me stay here for $300/month at least.  Then I definitely need a job.)

[Avanaar]

I'm a SAHM ...and trust me ...it's tough on the pocket!  I wanted to get a job to get us some extra money, but DH prefers I stay home (he's afraid of losing another baby from miscarriage <3).  I had also been trying to start an in-home daycare, but I think b/c I'm pregnant, a lot of people don't want to send their kids here for a few months, then find another provider for the time I'll want to 'take-off' after the baby's born.

As for insurance ...I'm trying to get Medicaid going.  But I do agree with you, Laura, that people who are working and need assistance are turned down ...but if you sit on your butt and do nothing all day they'll pay you all you want.  It's stupid.  I hope you can figure something out ...if I lived on your island, I'd babysit for you!!  =D

[mami1323]

It's called being a person with moderate income.  We don't get sh!t.  We are struggling all the time just to make ends meet.  We live from paycheck to paycheck with nothing left to spare.  And that's two of us.  We don't get any help with WIC or medicaid because we make too much.  We make to little to afford moderate income housing but make too much to be able to get into low income housing.  It's really sad.  I know exactly how you feel.  

[justice6920]

I am a working mom and WOULD LOVE to be a SAHM..... I am married but make more money than dh..... so i dont know if we could afford for me to stop working.... and his company doesnt offer health insurance....so i am kinda stuck! It *****

[johannaviles]

Im working too.  I make good money, have goor insurance, but I would love to be a SAHM or have at least a part time job to be with my kids for longer periods.  I just get to see my daughter when she wakes up, drop her in school, and then see her like at 6:00 p.m. :(

[ashiepooh]

I'm a SAHM and my husband makes probably too much money.  And we have extremely good insurance through Regence Blue Shield.  I used to work at Boeing, and got to keep my insurance, and they have top coverage for me, because I have back issues.  So insurance for myself isn't cheap!  LOL  We have a back up insurance through my husbands company, through Promera Blue Cross (i think thats the name, lol)

I'm not trying to rub this in either, so don't think that way!  We had officially paid all my husbands bills on in July, so now we open 3 seperate college fund accounts for our kids!  I did make more then my husband, and i've been asked to come back to work after i have this kid.  

If I could, and lived near everyone i'd love to watch the kids!  I feel bad because I am watching my sister, and friend struggle but I try to offer out to them that i'll watch their kids for free whenever!  

[gokuangel]

Well i dont have kids but i do stay at home so not sure what you would call me SAHW? hmmm? lol! I have been very blessed let me say that not to rub anything in anyones face  i am not that kind of person! but my DH works with his family and is able to make decent  $$,get raises, and get paid every week. We were very fortunate that his mother gave us a house pretty much as a wedding gift so we owe nothing on it! but let me say its taken us over 2 yrs to get it ready to move (im moving next weekend) in to it it needed lots of work plus the land had no utilities. We also have no car payment my DH paid off the car i had when we first met but it doesnt run so i still owe in that sense. Insurance well we do not get insurance that is one bad thing about working for family (but in my town its the best job for the $$) there is no option for it so the only thing to do is pay out of pocket! which is bad cus i have some health issues as well as needing fertility treatments.  We also do not qualify for medicaid or any other help in that matter because my DH is a resident NOT a citizen and they wont give you no help!

[LauraB78]

PLEASE don't be offended, I am honestly just curious... I just want to make sure it doesn't come across the wrong way... =)

But if you don't have kids, why aren't you working? Are you a student?

[gokuangel]

Laura-I will try not to take offense to that sometimes i do but i wont this time. My DH just decided he did not want me to be working! I have offered several times but he always no dont worry about things i will do it myself.  I am not sure if its just his nature since hes hispanic and most hispanics believe the wife should be at home or it could also be we went through alot of problems in the beginning of our relationship (long story not going into details) and he decided that me being at home was best for us. Either way around it its what we have decided to do and what is working for us! I have no reason to complain either the first time i was married i worked and worked and i busted my A$$ needless to say and i never had anything EVER! I never owned anything and at the end not even a bed did i have and i supported my X!! I am not a student either i graduated business school in 2004 though.

[ashiepooh]

Laura - what do you do for a job?  

[sweetangel7]

I never thought about being a sahm...until I became pregnant and it is very attractive to me HOWEVER it is a total pipe dream so I don't think about it too often!  I make more than dh and I carry the health insurance.  Unfortunately we have a fair amount of bills which we are trying to pay off and student loans and a mortgage and all the taxes and insurances that come with that.  Although I gripe about money, we have two cars that are paid off, a Harley, a nice home, luxeries like a plasma flat screen tv, money for extras (going out to eat 2x week...clothes, dvds, whatever).  I have to remind myself that things could be much worse and I am truly grateful for what we have.  It is soo easy to get caught up with the Jones.

[kikicoates78]

Well I am a nurse and I do love it, BUT I did just cut my hours back to 2 days a week and I won't work over an eight hour shift, I have a history of pre-term and we are not taking the chance. I am VERY fortunate to have such a supportive husband, and he is all for me staying home after the baby. The problem I face is I have 16 patients all with mental handicaps, and I love them all. They are already sad that I cut my days back. I am their family in their eyes. Some of them have no one, and the ones that do have family Well ... I wouldn't call that family. So the staff is all they have. I returned to school to get my BSN, which I have already said I still wouldn't leave my job, So after baby IDK maybe I will stay on one day a week, they love my nursing groups( really we just do crafts!) So I might just do that for a couple of hours a week, IDK. I am also wondering too how much the short pockets will effect me, I'm a BIG spender to say the least :(

[leetlebeanweasle]

I work now and might get a part time job after this little guy is a little older (3 or 4 months). I will stop working at the end of this month (Oct. 31st is officially my last day)
We are TRYING to sell our house so that I can be a SAHM totally but so far..nothing. The market stinks. The Mr. might figure out a way for me to stay home with little bean but its not going to be easy. (he just opened his own business a few months ago..so its just getting started)
We will also have to start paying for insurance (which I now have through my work..my boss has just paid it no questions asked and will continue through the end of December..but after that we are on our own.-I totally appreciate him paying through Dec. such a great boss!-)

Anyway long story short I will definitely be a SAHM for about 3 or 4 months then after that who knows.

[ashiepooh]

LauraB78 ~ I would contemplate it.  I mean your going to have unpaid maternity leave?  How will you afford anything?  

For me, I guice besides to think about your options and what other jobs would be available.  For me I don't have to pay full daycare when I go back to work because my work has a daycare in it, and they pay half of it.  But part of that is for them to get me to work more hours which is no problem for me.  Part of those big government corporations.  

Make out a list of pros and cons I guess.  Really think about it.  Maybe stay with your job now, and when you go back to work really start looking for another job!  I would think that maybe dshs would help while your out on leave with no pay!  I could be wrong, but maybe check with it?  I know my friend quit her job, she has two kids 2 and under, and went to dshs got on medical, applied for food stamps and got into this program where they help you find a job!  And they give you money while your looking for the job!  Maybe check into that.  

[casandbaby]

I am very fortunate to be a stay at home mom, especially the way the economy is turning. DH works full time an average of six days a week about 14 hours most of the time. He gets insurance, dental and vision through his job! I wouldn't say we are well off but we arn't struggling. It ***** that not everyone can be a SAHM. I am very lucky and appreciative that my hubby doesn't want me to work.

it ***** that you don't have the option and it seems your stuck in a bind whatever you choose. i'm sure we can help you come up with a solution and help you figure this out =]

[leighanne143]

i think i will still have to work once the baby is born due to both my fiance and i surviving from both of our pay checks.  i would love to open a day care though.

i agree that we middle class just struggle to make it get shafted.  that is why we need some changes in politics somehow to help us.  there is so much help for the low income and the wealthy.

[alaysha]

I'm single and a SAHM. I get grants and scholarships for school which total to about 22000+ a year so I go to school for about 2-3 hours a day and then get to be with Aspen the rest of the time and my housing is covered through the scholarships (nice little 3 bedroom). For insurance and dental I'm on medicare but I do the paid medicare where I pay a small premium.

[kjbutcher]

I work from home so I have the best of both worlds.  I would never be able to be a sahm with no income.  Currently I have a daycare but on 11/15 (hopefully) I will be working for state farm from home selling insurance again.  i will have to do some marketing at apartment complexes but I can take DS with me.  DH carries the insurance, but state farm also has an insurance plan should I suddenly become single.

[LauraB78]

I work in insurance.. (WHAT AN IRONIC JOKE, HUH?!)

I do workers comp and general liability and work for a small agency...

Being a SAHM is totally a pipe dream for me too, but I wanted to see what everyone else's situation is and how we all make it work!! =)

GREAT input ladies! Thanks so much!

[jenntanis]

Well, I don't have kids yet (unless you count my dog and DH), but I currently have the ability to work from home 5 days a week.  My DH and I make about the same, and because I'm a RN case manager for an insurance company, I have very good benefits.  When we do have children, I will have to put them into daycare or have to get a nanny because I'm not allowed to have outside noises while I'm working (I call patients all day).  My mom was a SAHM when I was young and I would love to be able to do it, but I don't think I will be able to.  There are lots of ways to be a nurse and work weekends only, but I can't work in the hospital anymore because I cannot lift, so I'm stuck.

[ashiepooh]

LauraB78 -  Maybe ask for a raise, and complain a bit.  I wish there was something I could offer to help.  Hang in there though!