Aa
ughhhh vent!!!!!
Ok so this is random. But I don't have anyone else to talk to about these things. My brother is 27 but is mentally handicapped and has the mind of maybe a 10 year old. He can't read, but he has completed a special kind of schooling up until he was 26 and is not dumb by any means. He is not physically disabled in any way. So anyways, ever since I got pregnant he has said things to me like, "Rosey are you mad that you ruined your life?" Or "dont you wish you never got pregnant?" Or "you should have waited till you were older" or "don't you just wanna jump off a bridge sometimes because you hate your life?" And I know he doesn't really understand but it really hurts my feelings! Especially because for a while I was actually considering termination and now that I am finally happy about this baby, he brings me down and constantly reminds me of how I fxcked up my youth... I have tried ignoring it, I have also tried telling him I am happy about it and wouldn't change it for the world. But he just said something about it just now (I am already having a rough night) and I flipped out. I said "yes josh, I wish I never would have gotten pregnant, I know my whole life is ****** up now, thank you for reminding me on a daily basis." And hes like "no Rosey I'm just tryin to say that you should have waited longer" and I'm like "yeah josh, I know that, but guess what, I didn't, I'm pregnant and there is NOTHING I can do to change it now. And this is YOUR niece or nephew that obviously you're not very excited to meet." We have had this discussion several times but tonight I was more rude about it because it is really getting to me. I know it sounds like I'm being harsh but it really hurts my feelings and he's just not getting it. Everytime I start to get happy about this pregnancy, he reminds me of how hard its gonna be and how I should have waited. And i deal with this everyday because we live in the sane house. Idk what to do anymore... :(
Just remember you are dealing with somebody with a lower mentality and maturity level, and as annoying and depressing as it may seem he probably doesn't understand the whole situation very well. All you can do is gently remind him of how happy you are and how everything is going great each time.Maybe when bub actually arrives it will be a whole different scenario, i'm sure he won't be reminding you of any negativity if he has no reason to :)
My sister is also mentally handicapped & is 11 years older than i am. I know how hard it is not to snap. But, i also know the joy she felt when she felt & seen my daughter move (in my belly) the first time & how excitex she got holding her the first time. It is hard. I was 20 when i had my daughter & my sister thought u could only have a baby if u were married & thats how u got a baby. U got married & asked for one.
Ok, so do you know anyone who has been pregnant at your age? If so, see they will talk to ur brother. It will get better & at some point in time he will understand but u also need to understand that he is not normal & did not go to the same kind of school as you. He doesnt know about sex or love or any of that except what he sees or hears.
Either way hun, it will be ok. Yes, you should have waited til you were older, financially stable & in a stable relationship. Well, if that was the case, there would be a lot less people on this earth. Just because your young & "not ready" doesnt mean u are too young or not ready.
Story for you. My mom had my sister at 16 didnt really want her but she got pregnant & decided to keep her. Because she kept her, she didnt go out & do drugs/drink. She joined the military. The military has paid for all of her college & my brothers as well (he is not in military, mom can now "pass down her educational benefits"). She is now 50 & works full time for the military. She is bringing home quite a bit of money. Shes told me many times if it wasnt for her having my sis so young, she wouldnt have joined the military.
no, im not saying join the military & it will solve ur problems. Im saying she was 16. The only reason mom tried was cuz she had a kid.
Either way hun, it will be ok. Yes, you should have waited til you were older, financially stable & in a stable relationship. Well, if that was the case, there would be a lot less people on this earth. Just because your young & "not ready" doesnt mean u are too young or not ready.
Story for you. My mom had my sister at 16 didnt really want her but she got pregnant & decided to keep her. Because she kept her, she didnt go out & do drugs/drink. She joined the military. The military has paid for all of her college & my brothers as well (he is not in military, mom can now "pass down her educational benefits"). She is now 50 & works full time for the military. She is bringing home quite a bit of money. Shes told me many times if it wasnt for her having my sis so young, she wouldnt have joined the military.
no, im not saying join the military & it will solve ur problems. Im saying she was 16. The only reason mom tried was cuz she had a kid.
If your got depression you need to see someone buddy they can teach you how to deal with this stuff. The stress is no good for you or your baby.
Hope you can sort this out in some way and be happy :))
Hope you can sort this out in some way and be happy :))
I'm not always happy with the pregnancy though... I have a lot of issues and am often depressed and he really hurts my feelings. Hopefully it does change after the baby is here but idk, we'll see.
That's a tough one. But if your happy with the pregnancy then that's all that matters. I know its hard but try to just focus on you, and not on what he's saying. I'm sure he doesn't mean to hurt you, he just doesn't understand. Stay strong and walk away when you need to. Besides, I'm your only pregnant for a little while and I bet he's going to be full of excitement when he sees the baby for the first time. :)
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