Successful pregnancy after losing a baby at 22 weeks

[Shannybaby78]

On June 11th I gave birth to my first child..a son at 22 weeks of pregnancy.  He did not survive.  I have so many questions and I'm still so very sad.  Has anyone experienced something similar?  My pregnancy was fine until week 20 then everything went down hill.  20 week u/s was fine but I started having back pain.  The pain got very severe to where I could not sleep or eat and I ended up in the hospital to find I had hydronephrosis.  I was sent home with a follow up appt scheduled with a dr to talk about stenting my kidney.  Not even a week later I started bleeding and went back to the hospital to find I was 8 cm dilated already.  My severe back pain prevented me from knowing I was in labor.  Has anyone ever had hydronephrosis during their pregnancy?  How about pregnancies after having a preterm baby?  Any help or advice is appreciated.  I think I really just want someone to talk to who understands what I am going through :)

[MiaJones1]

My fiance and I are going through the same situation. I actually did not know that I was pregnant and I went into the E.R for heavy bleeding and extreme cramping and I found out that I was 22 weeks pregnant and also in labor already. I gave birth to our baby boy Oliver Matthew, and he survived for about 2 hours in NICU. We are heartbroken but being strong by the grace of God. I am so ready to get pregnant again, but we have not tried yet. Praying for all you ladies who lost your sweet little ones.

[allisa723]

I just lost my first child, my baby girl Corina at exactly 20 weeks. I tried to take such great care of myself for her. I wouldn't even have caffeine, but I somehow feel like its my fault. I started cramping and spotting on Monday and I went to the ER where the doctor didn't perform a pelvic exam or sonogram, checked my blood and urine and basically told me I was overreacting and sent me on my way telling me just to take it easy. The next day at work I used the bathroom and started bleeding excessively and rushed to the ER where they did a sonogram and my baby was fine and moving around, but my cervix was thin and opened and I was already dilating. They said there wasn't anything to do and less than 24 hours from my first ER visit I gave birth to a silent baby. My boyfriend and I are devastated. They think I have incompetent cervix but they don't know. I won't go back to the doctor for 6 weeks. Its my greatest desire to have kids but I'm so scared something like this will happen again. I'm also just scared that I won't be able to deal with my grief and it'll hurt my relationship with my significant other. We just buried our child yesterday. Reading all these stories helps me feel that I'm not alone. I just feel like I have no purpose in life anymore and I don't know how to move on with my life.

[kerarichie]

Hi, I'm so sorry for you lost. I lost my lil Angel as well on October 29, 2013, after 23 weeks of pregnancy he lived for 2 hours. I am so devastated not a minute goes by that I don't think of him I want to hold him so badly.. he looked so perfect his heart beat was so strong. I was admitted on Oct 14, with a cervix measuring 1.5cm and an infection.  I so badly want to  fill this void, I feel so empty.

[KaseyDJ]

I lost my sweet baby boy on October 27, 2013 at 18 weeks. I had been having slight bleeding and severe abdominal pains for a couple of weeks. I went to the emergency room on October 18. I was told everything was fine with the baby, but that my cervix was soft and that I was severely constipated. I was told to follow up with my Obgyn ASAP. Which I did. Unfortunately my OB was not enthusiastic or concerned about my cervix and refused to perform a pelvic exam on my follow up visit. He listened to my baby's heartbeat with the Doppler and told me my cervix being soft was normal and sent me on my way! 7 days later I was still experiencing bleeding and went back to the ER. This time I was told I was dilated to 9cm and my water broke a few hours later and I had a boy that 6.8 oz. I was DEVASTATED. What has helped me to cope is writing to my baby when I'm feeling sad and missing him. Talking to friends and family about my son and using his name out loud. (Kayden). I'm not yet ready to take out his urn and look at keepsakes that I have of him. It is still too painful. But I take solace that Kayden is in a better place and is watching over me and that eventually I will be with him in heaven. Plus Kayden will always be in God's memory. I have no doubt about that. I'm still looking for someone to blame (including myself) for my baby's death. I feel if I would have done anything different in my prenatal care my child would still be alive. Now I am having baby fever and want to get pregnant again. Not to replace my child, but to feel a void. I know it might sound crazy to some. Love and prayers going out to anyone who has ever had to go through something of this nature. God is with you. Take care.

[KarolineHope]

Hi, I'm sorry to anyone who has suffered from early/late misscariges or even stillbirths as I know how you feel. My pain is still so raw. I was diagnosed with pcos when I was 19 and then at 24 I fell pregnant with the love of my life. I had probably one of the easiest pregnancies known to man as everything was perfect, no morning sickness, no bleeding, no pain, no weight gain, no nothing, some people didn't believe I was pregnant until they saw my bump. My daughter was due 15/9/13, I made it all the way to 37weeks to the day where I went to the hospital as I didn't feel her move for a couple hours. Where it takes 3midwives for them to tell me that they couldn't find my daughters heartbeat. She had passed away 3weeks before she was due, born 2days later on the 28/8/13. After going for my hospital check up to find out that there's was nothing wrong with me or my daughter, our bloods were fine and her placenta was perfect, they believe that her heart skiped a beat and just didn't start beating again. Like I said its still so painful and raw and I'd do anything to have her back. I have already asked my partner if we could have another baby, not to replace Hope but to have what we've always wanted. He wants another baby as much as I do but both of us are so scared that it might happen again, neither of us nore our families can go through this again. I don't know if it will be easier to conceive after having Hope, regardless of my pocs which is not a bad case.
Has anyone been through something similar and had a healthy pregnancy and baby after a loss so close to the end? If someone could please help or reply I would be most grateful.

[Mommylovesherlilgirls]

I was 22 weeks 2 days pregnant with identical twin girls and I woke up with back pain and cramping a little and I got in the shower and it got alot worse. I had an ob appointment around 2 so I just waited it off. By the time I got to the dr I was 3 cm dilated. I went straight to the hospital and was fully dilated within 15 min. I had my babies that night and they passed away between 10 and 15 min. That was not even 3 weeks ago and I'm so devastated. My heart is broken and I don't know what to do. I wonder if having another baby would help but then I also wonder if that could make the pain worse??