Advice on Husbands sex drive

[dunappy]

A few weeks ago I posted reguarding my husband going from ALWAYS wanting to have sex to Never. To make a long story short He was a very sexual man, always grabbing, groping, wanting sex. Awhile back (several weeks) he just changed, it was not gradual at all, in the past 6 weeks we have had sex 2 times, both times great for me but the last time he didnt finish which is not like him at all. He works out of town mon-fri never in the same area so every weekend when we would see each other we would be all over one another, during the week when he was gone we would text naughty things and pictures to each other. We have been together for almost 8 yrs. Anyway I dont know what to feel, I have talked to him about it and he blows up, says things like "is that all that matters to you is sex" etc. No its not but just dont understand why the sudden change. I am approaching 34 and he is 36. I am very open minded and very sexual and have always had great sex. For awhile I was on the pill and i had no drive, Husband wanted me to get off of it so i did and now told me to go back on it so I dont bother him so much with sex. Isnt this weird??? I have a lot of male friends and they cant believe it, most men complain about married life and the lack of sex and mine is complaining just the opposit. This past week I have been dreaming about other men, I do not like this and it scares me. This is wrong and i feel very guilty, but i cant help what I dream. He is coming home tonight and I plan on talking to him about these dreams and telling him i dont know what they mean if anything but i shouldnt be dreaming about other men i have dated or been with, i should be dreaming about him. Any advice PLEASE to help me with my talk with him tonight. Am I over reacting? thanks

[SeriousSam]

do you have kids? bipolar is usually genetic.

I do believe sometimes it is also associated with sex dysfunction isn't it?

[SeriousSam]

Thank you mentat non compos!  You have revealed the great male conspiacy of secrets.

Actually we "min" have no secrets as a rule and you will go nuts if you try to figuring them out - That is the normal secret. "duh"

[RockRose]

dun - that's great that it's worked out well for you.  

[Jasmine205]

* hugs* Happy you guys opened up a good line of communication and he was understanding that you only have his best interests at heart when you ask him things.
Bonus on the rockin' sex there after *smiles*

[dunappy]

ok, we had a very good talk last night. He didnt blow up and listened to what I had to say and my concerns. He is very stressed out at work but he is working at the same place for 14 years and didnt understand why its so different now. He says working out of town all the time is wearing on him and he really would like to find a different job so he can be home more.  He makes very good money at his job and where we live their just isnt any good paying jobs. So we talked about selling out famr and moving closer to a place where job markets are better. He says he just dont feel good about himself and he dont know why. I guess we need to continue to talk and let each other know what is bothering us without the other one getting defensive. We had great sex last night and he text me today saying how he loved it. So guess we keep marching on and hopefully things will strighten out. thanks

[Jasmine205]

I only read your post, so sorry if I repeat anything others have said.
Has he had a dr visit recently to your knowledge, since he tapered off wanting sex?
He may have found out something and doesn't want to share it with you, and thats why he doesn't feel like sexing you up lately. And NO, I don't mean (std) but who knows?

I mean, heart illness life threatening whatever? Is he in good health?
Is his job stressful?
I know when I feel depressed I don't want to have sex at all, I just don't want to, I don't mind being held, but actual sex then, seems like it causes me anxiety :\

So what did he tell you off your talk with him? Anything helpful or did he blow up at you again for mentioning it? Can you talk to his dr? or best friend and see whats happening?